Guys Who Lie About Their Age... Online... or Like Anywhere

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2011 3:37 AM GMT
    I had dinner with friends this weekend and the conversation went a little (or a lot) like this:

    Wilson (32yo): I am starting to really like Danny.

    Fidel (33yo): Really? Thats good. He seems like a good guy.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah, but I lied to him about my age. I don't know how to tell him the truth now.

    Fidel (33yo): *laughs*

    Me (29yo): Wait, what? What did you lie about?

    Wilson (32yo): My age! I told him I was 28.

    Fidel (33yo): Oh. my. god. *laughs*

    Me (29yo): *laugh* First of all, you soooo do not look 28. Maybe in the dark. hahahaha.

    Fidel (33yo): *laughs*

    Wilson (32yo): Fuck you bitch.

    Me (29yo): Why the hell would you do that?

    Wilson (32yo): Because he is 26. I was afraid he wouldn't be into me because I am in my 30s. Its only 3 years.

    Fidel (33yo): No, thats FOUR years! hahhaahha.

    Wilson (32yo): No, I don't turn 32 until towards the end of this year.

    Fidel (33yo): dude, 4 months, you're practically 32 now.

    Me (29yo): So, wait, what are you going to tell him?

    Wilson (32yo): I am going to tell him the truth. I am going to tell him that I was afraid that he would not be interested in me because I am a lot older than him but I am starting to really like him so I had to confess. Its really been bothering me so.... I dont know... how would you guys respond?

    Me (29yo): I would say PEACE OUT.

    Wilson (32yo): WHY? I am confessing because I like him and feel guilty about it.

    Me (29yo): Cause you lied.

    Fidel (33yo): Noooooooooo, they met online. He should know that most guys lie about their age online. You have to take the guys age and add at least 3 years to it to get the real age.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah....

    Me (29yo): NO. NO. NO. That is wrong and just because other guys do it doesn't mean its okay. thats so rude. I don't do that.

    Fidel (33yo): Watch, once you hit 30 you will understand. Once you hit a certain age certain guys will not talk to you anymore. When you hit 30 you'll see that some guys in their 20s will not be interested in you when you tell them your age.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah its true.

    Me (29yo): I am not hearing this right now. You guys are justifying lying about who you are.

    Wilson (32yo): Its a white lie.

    Me (29yo): No, because if a guy lied to me about his age I would wonder what else he could be lying about. Like what if he really has like an STD and says he doesnt?

    Fidel (33yo): That's totally different because thats a reckless lie.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah that isn't the same.

    Me (29yo): But if he is capable of lying about something as important as his age then he could be lying about anything.

    Wilson (32yo): Don't tell me you've never lied before because that would be a lie. I am sure you've lied before when you thought it would be harmless. This is the same thing.

    Me (29yo): But you're being deceiving from the beginning. If you didn't lie he would perceive you as someone completely different.

    Fidel (33yo): No, the lie is to have Danny give him a chance and it worked and now they are into each because of their personalities. They might've never even talked.

    Me (29yo): But how do you know Danny would not like you if you told him your real age from the beginning?

    Wilson (32yo): From my experience with other guys. I know there are guys in their 20s that get turned off by guys in their 30s.

    Fidel (33yo): Wilson, I know how you feel because it happened to me. After I turned 30 the guys in their 20s weren't as interested anymore. Wait, until you turn 30 in a few months. Actually, you might as well be 30 now.

    Me (29yo): Ugh, gross, shoot me now. I know I would ever lie about my age.

    Wilson (32yo): You just wait. The 20 something year old guys will not talk to you anymore.

    Questions:
    1. Guys over 30. How often have you been turned down by guys in their 20s because of their age?
    2. Is it okay to lie about your age and it is a white lie?
    3. Would you forgive a guy who lied about his age but confessed on his own?

    BTW, my friends are really great guys. very good people.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2011 3:37 AM GMT
    OMG I HAVE BEEN WONDERING WHERE THE HELL YOU DISAPPEARED TO.
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    Apr 19, 2011 3:42 AM GMT
    Also in reply to the question, someone lied to me about their age once by TWO YEARS and I was like fuck off.
    He also did some other shit so that was really just the cherry on top.

    Maybe I'm a minority but I don't care about age as long as you're honest.
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    Apr 19, 2011 3:46 AM GMT
    Anduru saidAlso in reply to the question, someone lied to me about their age once by TWO YEARS and I was like fuck off.
    He also did some other shit so that was really just the cherry on top.

    Maybe I'm a minority but I don't care about age as long as you're honest.


    awww baby. i thought you would just tl;dr this thread but you actually did... or at least i think you did.
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    Apr 19, 2011 3:53 AM GMT
    AvadaKedavra saidawww baby. i thought you would just tl;dr this thread but you actually did... or at least i think you did.

    i would never tl;dr you baby, and i will love you even when you're a wrinkly old man <3
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    Apr 19, 2011 4:09 AM GMT


    Avadakenavra said, "Would you forgive a guy who lied about his age but confessed on his own?"

    YES. He's just displayed a most magnificence of character. His desire for truth overcame his insecurities about self.

    -Doug
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    Apr 19, 2011 4:16 AM GMT
    I wish sometimes guys would tell me they are older than they are because I have such a negative feelings about young guys. However I did meet this 24 year old the other week that's super sweet, but I have my doubts once again.

    I occasionally tell people I'm 19 just to see if they believe me, but I usually accompany it with my pseudo name and that I'm bi.
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    Apr 19, 2011 7:39 AM GMT
    Anduru said
    AvadaKedavra saidawww baby. i thought you would just tl;dr this thread but you actually did... or at least i think you did.

    i would never tl;dr you baby, and i will love you even when you're a wrinkly old man <3


    which is set to commence in T minus........
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2011 7:43 AM GMT
    loosen your sphincter a bit buddy. It's really not that big a deal. Everyone is a liar, even the most honest of us lie allllll the time. I wouldn't be bothered if a guy lied about his age. It's not like it's a temporal lie.
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    Apr 19, 2011 7:52 AM GMT
    AvadaKedavra saidI had dinner with friends this weekend and the conversation went a little (or a lot) like this:

    Wilson (32yo): I am starting to really like Danny.

    Fidel (33yo): Really? Thats good. He seems like a good guy.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah, but I lied to him about my age. I don't know how to tell him the truth now.

    Fidel (33yo): *laughs*

    Me (29yo): Wait, what? What did you lie about?

    Wilson (32yo): My age! I told him I was 28.

    Fidel (33yo): Oh. my. god. *laughs*

    Me (29yo): *laugh* First of all, you soooo do not look 28. Maybe in the dark. hahahaha.

    Fidel (33yo): *laughs*

    Wilson (32yo): Fuck you bitch.

    Me (29yo): Why the hell would you do that?

    Wilson (32yo): Because he is 26. I was afraid he wouldn't be into me because I am in my 30s. Its only 3 years.

    Fidel (33yo): No, thats FOUR years! hahhaahha.

    Wilson (32yo): No, I don't turn 32 until towards the end of this year.

    Fidel (33yo): dude, 4 months, you're practically 32 now.

    Me (29yo): So, wait, what are you going to tell him?

    Wilson (32yo): I am going to tell him the truth. I am going to tell him that I was afraid that he would not be interested in me because I am a lot older than him but I am starting to really like him so I had to confess. Its really been bothering me so.... I dont know... how would you guys respond?

    Me (29yo): I would say PEACE OUT.

    Wilson (32yo): WHY? I am confessing because I like him and feel guilty about it.

    Me (29yo): Cause you lied.

    Fidel (33yo): Noooooooooo, they met online. He should know that most guys lie about their age online. You have to take the guys age and add at least 3 years to it to get the real age.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah....

    Me (29yo): NO. NO. NO. That is wrong and just because other guys do it doesn't mean its okay. thats so rude. I don't do that.

    Fidel (33yo): Watch, once you hit 30 you will understand. Once you hit a certain age certain guys will not talk to you anymore. When you hit 30 you'll see that some guys in their 20s will not be interested in you when you tell them your age.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah its true.

    Me (29yo): I am not hearing this right now. You guys are justifying lying about who you are.

    Wilson (32yo): Its a white lie.

    Me (29yo): No, because if a guy lied to me about his age I would wonder what else he could be lying about. Like what if he really has like an STD and says he doesnt?

    Fidel (33yo): That's totally different because thats a reckless lie.

    Wilson (32yo): Yeah that isn't the same.

    Me (29yo): But if he is capable of lying about something as important as his age then he could be lying about anything.

    Wilson (32yo): Don't tell me you've never lied before because that would be a lie. I am sure you've lied before when you thought it would be harmless. This is the same thing.

    Me (29yo): But you're being deceiving from the beginning. If you didn't lie he would perceive you as someone completely different.

    Fidel (33yo): No, the lie is to have Danny give him a chance and it worked and now they are into each because of their personalities. They might've never even talked.

    Me (29yo): But how do you know Danny would not like you if you told him your real age from the beginning?

    Wilson (32yo): From my experience with other guys. I know there are guys in their 20s that get turned off by guys in their 30s.

    Fidel (33yo): Wilson, I know how you feel because it happened to me. After I turned 30 the guys in their 20s weren't as interested anymore. Wait, until you turn 30 in a few months. Actually, you might as well be 30 now.

    Me (29yo): Ugh, gross, shoot me now. I know I would ever lie about my age.

    Wilson (32yo): You just wait. The 20 something year old guys will not talk to you anymore.

    Questions:
    1. Guys over 30. How often have you been turned down by guys in their 20s because of their age?
    2. Is it okay to lie about your age and it is a white lie?
    3. Would you forgive a guy who lied about his age but confessed on his own?

    BTW, my friends are really great guys. very good people.


    omg are these really your friends names. Their so diverse.....too diverse....like a 4th grade text book thats trying too hard. You need a black friend named like...........kareem. Then this whole scenario would be complete.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2011 7:56 AM GMT
    I don't think you needed the whole transcript to preface your questions.

    1) Never. I don't really use online sites for dating, so it hasn't been an issue. In the real world you'd have a conversation and maybe a few dates before age even comes up.

    2) I guess people say lying about one's age is a white lie because it's not meant to hurt anyone.
    I don't get it. Lying about one's age, makes the guy look insecure (a turn off). Also, if he's willing to lie about his age, where else is he willing to lie?

    3) I'd forgive the lie. It would be harder to trust the guy in the future.
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    Apr 19, 2011 11:25 AM GMT
    Ermine saidI don't think you needed the whole transcript to preface your questions.

    1) Never. I don't really use online sites for dating, so it hasn't been an issue. In the real world you'd have a conversation and maybe a few dates before age even comes up.

    2) I guess people say lying about one's age is a white lie because it's not meant to hurt anyone.
    I don't get it. Lying about one's age, makes the guy look insecure (a turn off). Also, if he's willing to lie about his age, where else is he willing to lie?

    3) I'd forgive the lie. It would be harder to trust the guy in the future.


    you must think I'm awful for posting the transcript in my response icon_redface.gif
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    Apr 19, 2011 11:28 AM GMT
    I showed this thread to some friends of mine we've all come to the conclusion that you need new friends who don't and wouldn't lie about something as petty as age.

    Dudes who have to lie about something like age are insecure and are people you should probably avoid because they usually tend to lie about other things which tend to be serious.

    tell your friend that if he can lie so casually about little things then there's no way someone is gonna trust him with the big things. That's simple logic. What he did is something lurkers and creeps do.
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    Apr 19, 2011 11:44 AM GMT
    i am sensing some tl;dr responses.
  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    Apr 19, 2011 11:46 AM GMT
    If a guy lied to me about his age, I would definitely wonder what else he would be capable of lying to me about. Yes, it may be a white lie but if I were to date someone I would hope that they would be secure enough to tell people their real age.
  • Ironman4U

    Posts: 738

    Apr 19, 2011 11:59 AM GMT
    Certainly some guys are not interested in me (or other older guys) because of age, but I certainly wouldn't be interested in them if they are that shallow. Granted, there are lots of reasons why guys don't want to date someone, and that's cool. Just saying that I don't want to date someone that wouldn't be into me for whatever reason.

    I would never lie about my age (online or not) and I immediately lose respect for someone that does. It does make me question their integrity and their self-confidence.
  • cyberwrassler

    Posts: 88

    Apr 19, 2011 12:03 PM GMT
    so wait....so I know this age is not even in the discussion (40+) but if the norm is to add three years to a guys age assuming he is lying...that would make me even OLDER cuz I put my real age....damn. Ageism is the sad reality here...start with honesty so that if something develops....it will be based on that forevermore. I will never understand how AGE and LOOKS are so important..if the guy looks HOT or you are ATTRACTED to him..who cares how old he is. Then once the conversation starts you can see what you have in common - that is what is important.....in my opinion
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    Apr 19, 2011 12:08 PM GMT
    I dated a 22yo; never lied to him, except by omission, when I was 34.
    We hit it off really well; thought he was crazy in love with me and I was quite smitten,but more lade back, as he was about to go away to school. When he decided to throw me a surprise birthday party he found out my age and freaked out--never talked to me again. "How could you lead me on?"
    For some reason he had it in his mind I was 26.
    It had a such an affect on me, I shaved the extra 4 years off my age when I started the on line thing. I think it lasted, till I began to meet guys who had shaved off much more, it pissed me off, but I couldn't blame them when I was just as guilty.
    I think when I turned 36 I went ahead and rounded up to 40, finding it weeded out the shallow young'ns.
  • WildeBoi81

    Posts: 20

    Apr 19, 2011 12:10 PM GMT
    I don't think I've ever been turned down by a guy because of my age (30), but I tend to always like guys right around my age. I also think I look pretty young for my age still. My bf (32), though, often lies about his age, which I find just ridiculous. Why would you want someone to think, "Wow, he's really 28? I thought he was older!" when they could be thinking, "Wow, he looks great for 32!" If a guy cares about 4 years in age and has irrational issues about that, then he has all kinds of other issues too. Plus...I think the 30s are often the peak time in a man's hotness; it's the age when it becomes much easier to get muscly and when his sense of style and self are a bit more confident and coherent, but when he still has his vibrant, youthful face.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 19, 2011 12:12 PM GMT
    Wilson (32yo): You just wait. The 20 something year old guys will not talk to you anymore.

    Questions:
    1. Guys over 30. How often have you been turned down by guys in their 20s because of their age?
    2. Is it okay to lie about your age and it is a white lie?
    3. Would you forgive a guy who lied about his age but confessed on his own?


    What a strange conversation.... I just chuckled. I'm glad I don't worry about things like that, even if I were single... which I'm not.

    I seem to get attention from guys of any age, the point is, I don't think about age. I don't think it is really OK to lie about it, but if I discovered somebody who lied about their age, I probably wouldn't hold it against them, beyond wondering why they did it in the first place.

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    Apr 19, 2011 12:14 PM GMT
    dustin_K_tx saidI dated a 22yo; never lied to him, except by omission, when I was 34.
    We hit it off really well; thought he was crazy in love with me and I was quite smitten,but more lade back, as he was about to go away to school. When he decided to throw me a surprise birthday party he found out my age and freaked out--never talked to me again. "How could you lead me on?"
    For some reason he had it in his mind I was 26.
    It had a such an affect on me, I shaved the extra 4 years off my age when I started the on line thing. I think it lasted, till I began to meet guys who had shaved off much more, it pissed me off, but I couldn't blame them when I was just as guilty.


    This is exactly how my friends feel.
  • suedeheadscot

    Posts: 1130

    Apr 19, 2011 12:15 PM GMT
    I have a penchant for the odd muscledaddies, but even I had to change my mind when I found out a "52 year old" was actually 62. I have my age limits. I'm now very guarded when meeting people from online and have to go through a mini-interrogation before I meet them!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 19, 2011 12:15 PM GMT
    I've never been ashamed of my age....Infact people think I'm lying by adding a few years instead of subtracting them...Funny ehicon_lol.gif
  • 2PecanDeBeurr...

    Posts: 302

    Apr 19, 2011 12:24 PM GMT
    #1 Not often. I tell them my age surprisely some want to know me more
    #2 Unacceptable. A lie is a lie. Greater or lesser.
    #3 Forgive YES, forget NO. Friends maybe kept at a distance.
    j.c.
  • gsh1964

    Posts: 388

    Apr 19, 2011 12:26 PM GMT
    First, I must say that I am a very proud 47 year old man. I tried lying about my age once, but I couldn't keep from laughing... so I was busted.. and I was 40, saying I was 38.... LOL!!!

    Your only as old as you will allow yourself to feel.

    To be honest, I know that it seems like saying your 28 when your 32 ( 5 years) isn't much of a difference, at any age. So that's no biggie. Saying your 10 years younger is not good.