What Is Love?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 20, 2011 10:36 AM GMT
    Seriously.

    So I'm writing a book right, and the main theme is love. I know, it's very original. The theme does get more specific than that but basically it is about the idea of being full of love versus the absence of love.

    While brainstorming I ran into the question of what love is. I'm not talking about love in an intimate romantic relationship. I'm talking about general love. There's all sorts of relationships that (ideally) involve love. There's a romantic relationship between 2 people, the love between a mother and child, or the love between two close friends or brothers (brotherly love).

    I started thinking-- are all these different forms of love the same at the core? In any one of those relationships, it could be strong enough that one person would gladly sacrifice themselves completely for the other person. Does that mean that love is something like the main ingredient, and with all the different relationships, different ingredients (such as romance or attraction) is added to the mix?

    What about love that is both romantic in nature as well as brotherly?? No, I'm not talking about falling in love with your actual brother (no incest jokes please). I'm talking about caring deeply for someone as a friend and equal just as you would for a sibling, but then also having romantic feelings and physical attraction to them.

    So what do you think about this whole subject of love??

    ---

    Btw, I tried looking at Borders for a good book on the philosophy of love, but didn't have much luck. Do you know of any good books on the subject?
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    Apr 20, 2011 2:09 PM GMT
    Try reading Rumi for some ideas and clarification...
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    Apr 20, 2011 2:10 PM GMT




    BABY




    DON'T




    HURT




    ME
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    Apr 20, 2011 2:11 PM GMT
    Anduru said



    BABY




    DON'T




    HURT




    ME



    I'm sorry but I had the SAME thought. lol.

    As for love.... It's whatever we want it to be. It is our fantasy.
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    Apr 20, 2011 2:13 PM GMT
    haha for the lyrics!!

    I was going to write the same thing.! icon_cool.gif
  • Doug688

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    Apr 20, 2011 2:19 PM GMT
    If you are looking for a philosophical analysis, the French 19th century author Stendhal wrote De l'amour in 1818. It's available in English as a Penguin classics paperback: Love. I had to read it in graduate school and it may offer some pertinent ideas (he wrote it after he was turned down by his great love).

    I do think you are on the right track by separating intimate love, love of parent and child, brotherly love, etc. There are common elements, but distinct differences. This book could take the rest of your life to write! Good luckicon_confused.gif
  • KONAMI55

    Posts: 100

    Apr 20, 2011 3:52 PM GMT
    Intimate love to me is an illusion that keeps one from possibly better options. Overall, love is something I do not possess, intimately or family. It is just not for me.
  • RD11

    Posts: 448

    Apr 20, 2011 3:54 PM GMT
    Love is unconditional
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 20, 2011 3:56 PM GMT
    love is your soul's recognition of its counterpoint in another

    - wedding crashers.


    (honestly, i think this really does best describe it)
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    Apr 20, 2011 4:46 PM GMT
    A Natural History of Love by Diane Ackerman
  • allanon

    Posts: 63

    Apr 20, 2011 4:57 PM GMT
    If you're writing a story, the best thing that love can be is a theme. If you get really creative, you can give it characteristics, personality, etc. but then you risk the possibility of not getting to the heart of the truth of love.

    Love is such a versatile word in the English language. It can be a feeling, an action, a thought, a poem, or other expression. It can be conditional, only for the sake of those who love you in return, or it can be unconditional, like the "love your enemies" idea.

    The best thing to do might be to write the story first and see how the IDEA of love evolves in the context of character, plot, dialogue, etc. Then, as you edit the rough draft, plug in some of the insights that you learned from the story. Don't take me too seriously, because I've never written more than a few short stories in my life.

    If you have to do research on the topic, try the Talmud, Derrida's "Politics of Friendship" ch.2, John ch. 15 from the New Testament, Sufi writings, and the Upanishads. Also, anything by Thich Nhat Hanh is a good route to take.
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    Apr 20, 2011 5:01 PM GMT
    Anduru said



    BABY




    DON'T




    HURT




    ME

    You have no idea how close I was to posting the exact same thing in the exact same color in the exact same size.
  • HndsmKansan

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    Apr 20, 2011 5:08 PM GMT
  • allanon

    Posts: 63

    Apr 20, 2011 5:14 PM GMT
    Sorry, I read the rest of the original post. First, you broke love down into two types: romantic love (eros), and brotherly/familial love (philia). There is one separation that you missed, and that is agape: the love that has no boundaries, that loves not only romantic partners and those within the "circle of friends" and family, but those outside the circle, such as enemies, the poor, and the marginalized.

    As far as the relationship between these loves, of course they share characteristics, like affection, selfless giving, and active listening. However, imo, it is in getting into the differences among the types of love that we get down to the truth of love. I would extrapolate, but I don't want to write a dissertation right now.icon_eek.gif
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    Apr 20, 2011 5:18 PM GMT
    Doug688 saidIf you are looking for a philosophical analysis, the French 19th century author Stendhal wrote De l'amour in 1818. It's available in English as a Penguin classics paperback: Love. I had to read it in graduate school and it may offer some pertinent ideas (he wrote it after he was turned down by his great love).



    I think I might have read that book once a long time ago. Fabio was on the cover, right?
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    Apr 20, 2011 5:19 PM GMT
    I'd say love in general, is when you'd put someone else before yourself.To handicap yourself, in the action of doing something for somebody, that's love.

    Romantic, involves sex. Brotherly, doesn't.
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    Apr 20, 2011 5:30 PM GMT
    No one is perfect until you love them.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Apr 20, 2011 5:34 PM GMT
    love is a stranger in an open car, to tempt you in and drive you far away
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    Apr 20, 2011 11:34 PM GMT
    What is LOVE?


    mmmmmmm how do you say....

    DEEEEGROOVY, DEEEELICIOUS, DEE-LITE???
    icon_cool.gif
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    Apr 21, 2011 12:00 AM GMT
    Anduru said



    BABY




    DON'T




    HURT




    ME


    +1, and in a BELLO font, I'm impressed ;)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 21, 2011 12:14 AM GMT
    staple_ saidI'd say love in general, is when you'd put someone else before yourself.To handicap yourself, in the action of doing something for somebody, that's love.

    Romantic, involves sex. Brotherly, doesn't.


    What you wrote is true within the confines of a healthy loving relationship. However, unfortunately, sometimes putting someone before yourself could also be a an unhealthy result of codependency and not love.
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    Apr 21, 2011 12:19 AM GMT
    GigoloAssassin saidWhat is LOVE?


    mmmmmmm how do you say....

    DEEEEGROOVY,

    DEEEELICIOUS, DEE-LITE???

    icon_cool.gif





    DEEEELECTABLE, DEEEEVINE,

    DEEEEGORGEOUS!!!


  • needleninja

    Posts: 713

    Apr 21, 2011 12:56 AM GMT
    Anduru said



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    DON'T




    HURT




    ME


    yeah i thought the same thing as well.
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    Apr 21, 2011 11:55 PM GMT
    Iceblink said
    GigoloAssassin saidWhat is LOVE?


    mmmmmmm how do you say....

    DEEEEGROOVY,

    DEEEELICIOUS, DEE-LITE???

    icon_cool.gif





    DEEEELECTABLE, DEEEEVINE,

    DEEEEGORGEOUS!!!





    YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!!!!!

    icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 22, 2011 7:22 AM GMT

    DON'T





    HURT





    ME





    NO





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