could you "handle" having a porn star for your long term bf?

  • rnch

    Posts: 11525

    Apr 22, 2011 3:11 PM GMT
    could you rationalize that your long term bf's having sex with other attractive, pumped up, big dicked men is "just his job" and not become jealous/envious?

    think long and thoroughly before posting your reply......
  • Aus92

    Posts: 328

    Apr 22, 2011 3:16 PM GMT
    I think I'd be okay with it...

    Just as long as I get in on backstage stuff icon_smile.gif
  • rnch

    Posts: 11525

    Apr 23, 2011 4:08 PM GMT
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    Apr 23, 2011 4:22 PM GMT
    thought about this.... No
  • kencarson

    Posts: 224

    Apr 23, 2011 4:22 PM GMT
    Considering how much I know about porn, and the behind the scenes, and the stop and go to get hard again while looking at porn, and the strange angles while cheating to the camera, and the amount of "straight" guys in the business, I'd have to say, it would really depend.

    It would depend on if this was the person's ultimate career goal. He would have to only be playing safe and be tested more than regularly. He would have to view it as "a job" and not "a lifestyle." And I would have to be in love.

    All of that considered, I would consider it.
  • eddieross69

    Posts: 841

    Apr 23, 2011 4:27 PM GMT
    I dated a well known porn director a few years ago. He was the nicest, most caring guy in the world. He gave me his undivided attention and affection when we were together. The relationship did not work out because it was a long distance relationship (me in Los Angeles and him in San Diego). I would drive down to spend the weekends with him, and when I was doing some work in Tijuana during the week, I would stay with him, too.

    Needless to say, I had absolutely no issues with his career.
    When we went out to dinner or to a club, we would be surrounded by his "actors". He was always the one to initiate holding my hand or draping his arm over my shoulder. If anything, I sensed jealousy from the "actors".

    He may have been the exception, since he clearly demonstrated to me that he could seperate work from his private life.

    So yeah, my experience has been that it is possible to have a relationship with someone in that industry. Not all, but some.
  • rebelbeard

    Posts: 558

    Apr 23, 2011 4:28 PM GMT
    Absolutely! There is a difference between just having sex as a job and making love to someone by choice. If he was into me and I was into him it wouldn't be a problem.

  • hawkeye7

    Posts: 565

    Apr 23, 2011 4:28 PM GMT
    I think I could but I am pretty sure mos men could not handle it in the least........I did not do porn, but I was a stripper and did alot of modeling. Guys I was dating were always freaking out about it, asking if I was sleeping with that Photographer or was I fucking the other models

    I do not think most men could do it
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    Apr 23, 2011 4:33 PM GMT
    I've done it before. It never really works out. (begin rash generalization) Guys in that industry have very short attention spans. Everything is great for a month or two until they get a call for another "opportunity". Then its back in the life and you're forgotten about. No ill feelings but commitment isn't really in their vocabulary.
  • kencarson

    Posts: 224

    Apr 23, 2011 4:38 PM GMT
    People have said the same about us regular actors icon_smile.gif
  • rebelbeard

    Posts: 558

    Apr 23, 2011 4:39 PM GMT
    JeffreyVM saidI've done it before. It never really works out. (begin rash generalization) Guys in that industry have very short attention spans. Everything is great for a month or two until they get a call for another "opportunity". Then its back in the life and you're forgotten about. No ill feelings but commitment isn't really in their vocabulary.


    That could happen to anyone. It doesn't mean it is just guys in that industry. You really can't speak for everyone when it comes to how they do commitment. Just my opinion.
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    Apr 23, 2011 4:50 PM GMT
    sure why not...imagine the possibilties
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    Apr 23, 2011 4:57 PM GMT
    Are there really "straight" "actors" who do gay porn?
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    Apr 23, 2011 5:03 PM GMT
    if i did. He'd be on tight ass time schedule. If the sex scene takes like 5min and he's on there for 10 min and doing overtime...there's gonna be some problems
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    Apr 23, 2011 5:13 PM GMT
    Nope, but I could date casually and/or be friends.
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    Apr 23, 2011 5:16 PM GMT
    No way. Don't want everyone knowing my business.

  • nvaguy69

    Posts: 54

    Apr 23, 2011 5:26 PM GMT
    It would really depend on many factors.

    Knowing that most men can easily separate physical and emotional when it comes to sex, I don't think I would have a problem with it. It's when you have a partner that you know could be susceptible to forming an emotional bond with someone he's performing with. If you were secure in your relationship with your partner and there are no secrets then it would be ok. Maturity, trust and communication play big parts in whether this would work or not, I think.. And then there's the frequent testing if you're doing anything questionable. BB in porn has made a big comeback.

    And, knowing that you have a finite amount of years in the business before people get tired of seeing you or you start aging then it's not like it'll be a long term gig. Personally, I think guys 35 and up are the hottest out there but we all know that the porn business in general only caters to 30 and below.. typical example is Sean Cody's site.. you may as well be dead if you're over 30 with this guy.

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    Apr 23, 2011 5:47 PM GMT
    nvaguy69 saidIt would really depend on many factors.

    Knowing that most men can easily separate physical and emotional when it comes to sex, I don't think I would have a problem with it. It's when you have a partner that you know could be susceptible to forming an emotional bond with someone he's performing with. If you were secure in your relationship with your partner and there are no secrets then it would be ok. Maturity, trust and communication play big parts in whether this would work or not, I think.. And then there's the frequent testing if you're doing anything questionable. BB in porn has made a big comeback.

    And, knowing that you have a finite amount of years in the business before people get tired of seeing you or you start aging then it's not like it'll be a long term gig. Personally, I think guys 35 and up are the hottest out there but we all know that the porn business in general only caters to 30 and below.. typical example is Sean Cody's site.. you may as well be dead if you're over 30 with this guy.



    well heres one of I'm pretty sure many sites for men over 30
    http://www.menover30.com/ so not everyone drops out of the industry at 30 for some its there prime , so in fact it could be very long term
  • easterndude69

    Posts: 632

    Apr 23, 2011 6:10 PM GMT
    It depends. If he really cared mostly about me and viewed what he did as just pleasure and a job(but not love), then yes. Sex can mean just pleasure at times, but no love or affection with it.
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    Apr 23, 2011 8:55 PM GMT
    I'd be more likely to date a porn actor than a traditional actor.
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    Apr 23, 2011 9:04 PM GMT
    colton9001revbwc.jpg

    Unless it was Colton Ford... there is always an exception to the rule.
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    Apr 23, 2011 9:05 PM GMT
    Absolutely not
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    Apr 24, 2011 2:19 AM GMT
    If I ever decide to have a monogamous relationship, I would PREFER he be involved in the adult industry. Sex on camera is not cheating...it's work...and those people are much less likely to cheat, because the STD risks could end their careers.
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    Apr 24, 2011 2:32 AM GMT
    paulflexes saidIf I ever decide to have a monogamous relationship, I would PREFER he be involved in the adult industry. Sex on camera is not cheating...it's work...and those people are much less likely to cheat, because the STD risks could end their careers.


    this is an very interesting perspective, and one i can empathize with readily. everyone has to have a job. some peoples' jobs just make more interesting dinner conversations than others, but in the end, a job is a job.

    sex is not the equivalent of intimacy. although i cannot speak for anyone else, i know this from firsthand experience. when i was younger, or rather, less experienced with relationships (gay or otherwise), i thought they were the same idea, stupid silly me.



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    Apr 24, 2011 2:47 AM GMT
    rnch saidcould you rationalize that your long term bf's having sex with other attractive, pumped up, big dicked men is "just his job" and not become jealous/envious?

    think long and thoroughly before posting your reply......


    Whatever one thinks about it I think it's irrelevant how the job sex partners look like.