Apr 24, 2011 11:40 AM GMT
A. The Lunatic: You knew he was crazy the first day that you met him, and you went out with him anyway. Not only did you go out with him, you had a relationship with him. It seemed like a good idea at the time, because you liked being the object of someone's obsession...until he started monitoring your phone calls and checking your car mileage.
B. Mr.Know-It-All: He went to an Ivy League school. He was a member of MENSA. He was polysyllabic. You felt smarter when you were around him -- that is, until you didn't. Then it occurred to you that he'd rather talk than have sex, and that is not how you roll.
Eventually, you realized a ROOMBA would love you more than this robot. The sad truth is, it took him a week to notice you were gone.
C. The Loser: For a while, you could overlook the fact that he didn't have a job, that you paid for every single date. I mean, he was a nice guy, right? However, you had to draw the line when he lost the will to bathe with soap, when he started picking clothes up off the floor with his toes because he "didn't have the energy" to bend over and pick them up.
D. The Jerk: He was hilarious! He was the life of the party! He would not let anyone or anything stop him from speaking his mind whether he was right or wrong...and he was ALWAYS right.
E. The Keeper: He's handsome, he's ambitious and successful. He's really into you, the real you. Every other guy you dated was worth it if they led you to this one. You make frog legs for dinner and hope it lasts forever.