Pilots & stewards

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2011 2:18 AM GMT
    I have found that dating in my area hasn't been working for me.
    Having a long-distance thing with someone online is out of the question though because I've been there, done that, and it's too much for me now.

    So now I have an interesting dilemma.

    I met a guy online recently. He's smart, sexy, charming, and as into me as much as I'm into him. After chatting with him for a while the first time, I found out that he's a pilot. When I initially asked him where he was from he said he was in Boston for business.... but lives in London. He also mentioned that he flies to Toronto about 4 or 5 times a year usually.
    When we started to like each other a lot more, he questioned getting more Toronto flights and he said he'll definitely be visiting Toronto more often over the summer.

    I'm definitely gonna go with this and see where it takes me. I just think why not, I'm young and still have time to figure life out.


    Have you ever dated a pilot or steward?
    Did they live near you or far away?
    What was your experience like?
    Opinion on LTR-ability?
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    Apr 25, 2011 2:20 AM GMT
    Dating a trans-continental pilot is more difficult than dating a military man.
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    Apr 25, 2011 2:50 AM GMT
    BornWired saidFlyboy = man whore.
    He'll have a nice warm hanger (-on) to park his vessel in every port.
    No LTR possible, in my opinion.
    Sorry.

    Thanks so much for your generalization with no explanation of your experience. icon_neutral.gif
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    Apr 25, 2011 3:31 AM GMT
    Anybody else?
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    Apr 25, 2011 3:46 AM GMT
    Anduru said
    BornWired saidFlyboy = man whore.
    He'll have a nice warm hanger (-on) to park his vessel in every port.
    No LTR possible, in my opinion.
    Sorry.

    Thanks so much for your generalization with no explanation of your experience. icon_neutral.gif
    Ok, how about my experience? He's right. icon_wink.gif
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    Apr 25, 2011 4:42 AM GMT
    TheGuyNextDoor saidAndrew,,, what is it you are hoping for out of this guy. A friendship or a LTR?

    LTR.

    So far he's been reminding me of my ex, who actually is also from London, and I was with that ex for a year - my longest relationship. We broke up when I went back to school because I was busy and we just couldn't keep it up anymore.

    Now I'm less busy because of not caring enough about school to study (I get 70s and 80s on everything, why should I study?) and not having any friends (everyone hung out together a lot first year, then the inevitable drama started happening and I ended up being alone again).

    In addition to that, the major thing that made my past relationship work was the fact that we skyped pretty much daily.. and so far whenever we both have free time we've been skyping each other. If that keeps up, that will fulfill my need to interact with him often.
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    Apr 25, 2011 4:48 AM GMT
    I've found them all to be a bit flighty
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    Apr 25, 2011 4:58 AM GMT
    beneful1 saidI've found them all to be a bit flighty

    4iznh0.jpg
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    Apr 25, 2011 5:00 AM GMT
    How can you have a LTR with someone who is in your city only 4-5 times a year.

    .
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    Apr 25, 2011 5:08 AM GMT
    Manwhore?!

    I find that highly offensive icon_evil.gif

    I'm in a LTR however not long distance (thank God), and many of my colleagues are looking for a more meaningful relationship wether long distance or next door...

    I say, don't generalize and give it a try. icon_smile.gif

    Good luck!

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    Apr 25, 2011 5:12 AM GMT
    The first guy I ever grew to have feelings for was a pilot. He added my msn address accidentally, meaning to add someone from a chat room he'd been in. This was in May '08. We talked every day online for hours, (followed by phone calls eventually) for over 2 months. He got about 1 flight a month out to Saskatoon, but ironically as soon as we started talking the flights stopped/he got sick/something always got in the way. much to his dismay (I was uncertain of what was happening or where things were going, so I don't recall feeling as upset as he had been).
    Eventually in July he had grown a bit distant, and admitted that he'd met someone in TO (where he lived) and felt bad for talking to me and not letting me know about it, even though we'd never officially labeled ourselves as dating. He was respectful and let me know the situation, and is to this day someone I respect and value as a mentor (he was 28, I was 1icon_cool.gif.
    We've met half a dozen times since, most recently when I went to TO for the first time and spent the afternoon with him and his bf. We are good friends and I still trust/care for him as I always have. We developed a non-sexual relationship that I wouldn't have traded for any other.
    I know this doesn't really help as you're planning/banking on meeting this guy sooner than later, and on a regular basis, but perhaps looking at it from the LTF (long term friendship) perspective would be a bit safer, until you have reason to believe you're both willing, able, and trustworthy to take it further given the distance between you.
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    Apr 25, 2011 5:37 AM GMT
    funatthesun saidManwhore?!
    I find that highly offensive icon_evil.gif
    I'm in a LTR however not long distance (thank God), and many of my colleagues are looking for a more meaningful relationship wether long distance or next door...
    I say, don't generalize and give it a try. icon_smile.gif
    Good luck!

    I assume you're a pilot or steward then?

    Thanks for the insight. (:
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    Apr 25, 2011 5:39 AM GMT
    jerbear89 saidThe first guy I ever grew to have feelings for was a pilot. He added my msn address accidentally, meaning to add someone from a chat room he'd been in. This was in May '08. We talked every day online for hours, (followed by phone calls eventually) for over 2 months. He got about 1 flight a month out to Saskatoon, but ironically as soon as we started talking the flights stopped/he got sick/something always got in the way. much to his dismay (I was uncertain of what was happening or where things were going, so I don't recall feeling as upset as he had been).
    Eventually in July he had grown a bit distant, and admitted that he'd met someone in TO (where he lived) and felt bad for talking to me and not letting me know about it, even though we'd never officially labeled ourselves as dating. He was respectful and let me know the situation, and is to this day someone I respect and value as a mentor (he was 28, I was 18.)
    We've met half a dozen times since, most recently when I went to TO for the first time and spent the afternoon with him and his bf. We are good friends and I still trust/care for him as I always have. We developed a non-sexual relationship that I wouldn't have traded for any other.
    I know this doesn't really help as you're planning/banking on meeting this guy sooner than later, and on a regular basis, but perhaps looking at it from the LTF (long term friendship) perspective would be a bit safer, until you have reason to believe you're both willing, able, and trustworthy to take it further given the distance between you.

    That's some solid advice, thankyou for sharing.
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    Apr 26, 2011 2:42 PM GMT
    bump~ lolz
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    Apr 26, 2011 2:45 PM GMT
    beneful1 saidI've found them all to be a bit flighty
    At least they don't work for a cereal company. Those guys are total flakes.
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    Apr 26, 2011 2:52 PM GMT
    I used to fuck a pilot. He was awesome. Great kisser.
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    Apr 26, 2011 3:10 PM GMT
    My ex of 11 years is a FA.
    We lived in the same city.
    Worked out well, and we're still good friends.
    Actually a lot of flight attendents speak 2-3-4 languages, have college degrees many male FA are nurses. They are very professional.



    When my ex returned home after his 3 day international flights, he was tired.

    Have to say if your guy is flying in from London to Toronto......there will be times....he is not up to having company. Flight delays....health emergency on board, turbulence, bad crew, bad fellow pilots...etc..... They just want to be left alone!

    After you've been a passenger on a Transatlantic flight, are you up to going on a date?....so imagine working a Transatlantic flight and knowing you have to meet up with someone for a date. He's probably been awake already for 16 hours.


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    Apr 26, 2011 3:27 PM GMT
    Anduru saidI have found that dating in my area hasn't been working for me.
    Having a long-distance thing with someone online is out of the question though because I've been there, done that, and it's too much for me now.


    Given these assumptions, I'd say give it a try! Though I might probe a bit on why dating in your area hasn't been working out for you, hard to blame that on an "area" -

    Anduru saidHave you ever dated a pilot or steward?
    Did they live near you or far away?
    What was your experience like?


    I haven't dated anyone on a flight crew, but I have a good friend who is a commercial pilot and another friend who married a flight attendant.

    The pilot only really dates at his home base - though I assume he must occasionally get together with someone on one of those "glamorous" trips. Turnarounds are short and they're often in crappy hotels, far from any fun.

    My friend who married a flight attendant - lives in a vacation destination, and the flight attendant retired to be with him.

    Anduru said
    Opinion on LTR-ability?


    Better than a run of the mill long distance thing, as something will regularly bring you together. But worse than someone who is around. It is very difficult to keep something together when you're not around to share the ups and downs of daily life.
  • misternick

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    Apr 26, 2011 3:48 PM GMT
    It boils down to being in a relationship with someone who's away frequently for indeterminate amounts of time. Planning ahead is tough, and plans can change in a matter of minutes.

    There are lots of ways to deal with that, though.

    If you're a jealous guy, that'll be practically impossible, I think. Otherwise, you could go the absolute trust route (how many people will respect that trust is another issue), you can go the "nothing serious, just fun" route until you get a feel for the lifestyle, and there's always the open relationship.

    It's not for everybody, but I know some pilots and flight attendants who are great guys.
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    Apr 26, 2011 3:53 PM GMT
    Well same for me ... i can't date any guy around me ...

    I think dating a pilot is sexy ... but doubting too ... cuz pilot = having fuck buddies to play with them ... so not sure u gotta know more about him maybe he is honest icon_smile.gif
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    Apr 26, 2011 4:07 PM GMT
    LeanathleticDC saidMy ex of 11 years is a FA.
    We lived in the same city.
    Worked out well, and we're still good friends.
    Actually a lot of flight attendents speak 2-3-4 languages, have college degrees many male FA are nurses. They are very professional.



    When my ex returned home after his 3 day international flights, he was tired.

    Have to say if your guy is flying in from London to Toronto......there will be times....he is not up to having company. Flight delays....health emergency on board, turbulence, bad crew, bad fellow pilots...etc..... They just want to be left alone!

    After you've been a passenger on a Transatlantic flight, are you up to going on a date?....so imagine working a Transatlantic flight and knowing you have to meet up with someone for a date. He's probably been awake already for 16 hours.




    Being a FA , i couldn't have said it better ......



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    Apr 26, 2011 4:23 PM GMT
    I was in an LTR with a pilot. We lived in same city (well, close anyway) and it was fine. He was gone several days a week but then back for several days and I joined him on trips from time to time. He was a long-haul pilot.

    It wasn't really that much different to dating a nine to five type.

    Agree with an earlier post though, how can you be in a relationship with someone you see 4-5 times a year? Suggest that is not a relationship but a friendship (well, another form of relationship really isn't it?).

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    Apr 26, 2011 11:50 PM GMT
    showme said
    Anduru saidI have found that dating in my area hasn't been working for me.
    Having a long-distance thing with someone online is out of the question though because I've been there, done that, and it's too much for me now.


    Given these assumptions, I'd say give it a try! Though I might probe a bit on why dating in your area hasn't been working out for you, hard to blame that on an "area" -

    because I'm emotionally unstable and in general mentally fucked so it's difficult to get along with anybody much less someone in my city.
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    Apr 26, 2011 11:53 PM GMT
    showme said
    Anduru said
    Opinion on LTR-ability?


    Better than a run of the mill long distance thing, as something will regularly bring you together. But worse than someone who is around. It is very difficult to keep something together when you're not around to share the ups and downs of daily life.

    He has skype and apparently uses it often so we've been cam-chatting on there.
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    Apr 26, 2011 11:54 PM GMT
    apt773 saidAgree with an earlier post though, how can you be in a relationship with someone you see 4-5 times a year? Suggest that is not a relationship but a friendship (well, another form of relationship really isn't it?).

    You read that faceless guys reply but not my entire post?
    He said he is able to visit more often because he requested more Toronto flights.