I agree Sahem but I think its even more tiring to have to keep say : " Hi I am joe and I am gay! all the time "
Do you really think that out gay guys do this? Sounds like you've drunk the social conservative kool-aid that claims that out gay guys are always pushing their sexuality down others' throats. In any event, you're wrong. It is MUCH more exhausting to stay in the closet.
You have some growing up to do. There's nothing wrong with masculine gay guys - you have a whole website here devoted to them.
But the only reason that "down low" and other low-key gay guys are more accepted is because being gay has become more accepted. And why is that? Because openly gay guys - including guys who do not fit the stereotypes - have the courage to come out and just live their lives, with no apology.
When I was in my 20s, a story in a local magazine made a reference to the gay area of town being full of florists and hairdressers "gamboling of an evening." Being the serious young lawyer that I was, I wrote a letter excoriating the author for assuming, in print, that all gay guys were flittery, lightweight queens in stereotypically fey professions. Look at how things have changed now!
To the OP, guys who have taken the big step of being honest with both themselves and those around them - and I don't mean by being nelly, or by constantly saying "I'm gay," but just being who they are and not lying about it - are not as likely to want to hang out with guys who are embarrassed about themselves.