Sharing passwords with your boyfriend!

  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    Apr 26, 2011 6:07 AM GMT
    The other day I lost my phone while I was hanging out with my best friend and I needed to use his phone to call mine. It was locked so I asked him what his password was and he told me what it was. He then told me that even his serious boyfriend of 1 year doesn't know his password (They live together so they are pretty serious) and that his boyfriend never will, because it is his own "personal space".

    I actually found that kind of odd because I had a 7 year relationship with my ex (that's the only relationship that I have been in, he was the first guy I dated) and we knew each others password to everything. I even know his social security number, sometimes he even forgot his social and I had to remind him and the same thing goes for his bank account number. (I'm good at remembering numbers)

    I just wanted to know what all you guys do when it comes to passwords and boyfriends? Do you share or keeps yours a secret? What do you do when a guy doesn't share his password? How long do you wait until you allow the guy that you are dating to have free reign to your personal privacy information? This includes phone passwords, A4A, Manhunt, and whatever else you have a password for.


    Personally, If I was in a serious relationship I would not mind if the guy had all my passwords because I have nothing to hide. I also would not mind if the guy did not share his passwords with me if I trusted him.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 26, 2011 7:49 AM GMT
    Bad idea. I think it's grounds for mistrust.
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    Apr 26, 2011 7:51 AM GMT
    I think 1 year is too soon to be swapping passwords and SSN.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 26, 2011 7:54 AM GMT
    This reminds me of Tyler Perry's Why did I get married too?

    I want the password for your phone! Give me the password Marcus!
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    Apr 26, 2011 9:34 AM GMT
    I wouldn't want them to have my passwords etc.

    When I text/email/message my best friend, who I trust more than I will ever trust a partner, I will quite often ask her for relationship advice. She's able to help me collect my thoughts and figure out the situation without letting my emotions run awry.

    If my partner were to check my phone/inbox and see that I was asking my best friend what to do about problems I had with them, it would obviously not be good.
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    Apr 26, 2011 9:53 AM GMT
    Anduru said
    If my partner were to check my phone/inbox and see that I was asking my best friend what to do about problems I had with them, it would obviously not be good.


    Sometimes it needn't even go that far!

    One time I went on vacation with this guy and we had some differences come up. Well, I was on a forum writing about it and asking for advice. He was always using my laptop so apparently when I had turned my back he was on it and read what I was saying.

    The friendship fell apart IMMEDIATELY...while we were out of town icon_razz.gif
  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    Apr 26, 2011 10:30 AM GMT
    Hey guys,
    Thanks for your input and stories, I can now see how this could lead to mistrust and how it could feel like an invasion of someone's personal space. I always thought if you moved in with a boyfriend it changed your relationship status to serious, I can see how that line of thinking can be wrong. I just realized I still have a lot to learn when it comes to dating.
  • shawn06

    Posts: 337

    Apr 26, 2011 11:09 AM GMT
    Never share my passwords. He figured them out at first, not that it mattered but there is a line of privacy that no matter how long the relationship is you will not be permitted to just randomly look through. Even as a kid no one could look through my bookbag, not because there was anything bad, but it was mine and only I could look through it. It's personal possession, there are certain things some people like to keep to themselves and for me it has always been privacy whether it's wanting to be alone or keeping my passwords to myself, two things I value greatly. You should trust who your with or not be with them, if you have to snoop then your suspecting they are doing the wrong thing. I don't mind sharing most of personal space but even now a days my computer, phone, and yes still my backpack are kept for only me to look through.
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    Apr 26, 2011 11:20 AM GMT
    My boyfriend has all my passwords. I trust him to nos misuse them and look through my stuff.
    He doesn't.

    If he should then I still don't think I have anything to hide but it would piss me off.
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    Apr 26, 2011 11:39 AM GMT
    I had my bfs credit cards numbers and passwords after a couple of months... After a year, most them have my petnames or love in them icon_razz.gif

    He's definitely a 'we' and not a 'me' man
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    Apr 26, 2011 12:33 PM GMT
    Never.
    It has nothing to do with privacy.
    It has everything to do with protection against the probability of him logging into my account and fucking everything up on purpose...especially accounts for sites where I make $$$.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 26, 2011 1:55 PM GMT
    I guess we share them...He knows all mine, because he's a memory freak.
    If he set's up an account or something for us; I ask what the pin or user name is and he'll say it's your Yahoo password or your whatever password.
    He got pissed at me yesterday, because I was driving when we pulled up on a ATM and I had to ask for his pin. "It's the same as its always been". "And that is?"
    Using my age as excuse isn't working anymore.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 26, 2011 1:58 PM GMT
    We share everything. Call it a gift, if you like. I gave myself and all about me to Bill. He gave himself to me. Then, as a second gift, we gave each other back to each other. lol, I hope that made sense.

    There's something about being a glad and open book, and the quiet miracle of realizing you have someone you can do that with. (ok now you can all get mad)

    *hides under bed*
  • alphatop

    Posts: 1955

    Apr 26, 2011 2:02 PM GMT
    Big NO-NO! My ex stole 800 euros from my account because he knew my password. DON'T DO IT!
    But, since he did what he did....I had to take my revenge somehow. So, I also knew his passwords for MSN, Skype, gmail etc. and I deleted all his contacts (that he collected for years), and cancelled all his accounts. Call me a bitch, but he had it coming!
  • Sk8Tex

    Posts: 738

    Apr 26, 2011 2:16 PM GMT
    My partner and I have absolutely no secrets from each other.. well I am at least 100% certain of that from my side lol. It's funny.. even though I am constantly telling him what my passwords are they are too complicated for him to remember them. :-P Guess that means they're effective.

    On a side note though, this exact issue may be the cause of Courtney Cox and David Arquettes upcoming divorce...as she signed into his iTunes account and discovered her funny hubby has been on Grindr... doh! icon_rolleyes.gif

    But what a bitch for outing him on Jimmy Kimmel Live..

    http://gaylife.about.com/b/2011/04/26/courteney-catches-david-arquette-on-grindr.htm
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    Apr 26, 2011 2:27 PM GMT
    Too funny...I hope I'm not alone when I say Mr. Arquette can stay on his side of the fence.
    It reminded me of going on my partners computer, because I didn't want to wait on my to come on and his was on already.
    I'm used to using history to go back to sites.
    When I saw all the links to Republican sites. I became quite concerned. I would never out him as a Republican though.
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    Apr 26, 2011 2:32 PM GMT
    meninlove said We share everything. Call it a gift, if you like. I gave myself and all about me to Bill. He gave himself to me. Then, as a second gift, we gave each other back to each other. lol, I hope that made sense.

    There's something about being a glad and open book, and the quiet miracle of realizing you have someone you can do that with. (ok now you can all get mad)

    *hides under bed*
    That second gift is the one that so many people can't figure out, yet it's the single most important factor in keeping a long-term relationship. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 28, 2011 2:49 AM GMT
    My partner is my best friend - who I talk to about relationship advice - and knows all my passwords.
  • commoncoll

    Posts: 1222

    Apr 28, 2011 6:12 AM GMT
    There has to be enough trust. I think everybody in my family knows everyone else's passwords to banks, email addresses, SSN, DL, etc
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    Apr 28, 2011 6:48 AM GMT
    I don't see how my bf knowing my passwords could possibly cause me any harm, I trust him with my eyes closed. But again, every relationship is different.