Physical Appearance vs. Inner Being

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 27, 2011 3:32 AM GMT
    I'm asking this just to get the views and opinions of others. What is more important when meeting someone on a site like this, the Physical or the Inner being of a person? Inner being simply being Positive Attitude, loving and caring. I ask this cause I notice I will message people online, but I usually don't get a response from people. I assume it's because I don't have a pic of me displaying muscles all over the page. So I just want to see what you guys think about that.
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    Apr 27, 2011 3:36 AM GMT
    Physical appearance doesn't mean shit in the long run in the real world. In the short run in the real world it gets your foot in the door to meeting people and getting them to know you. In a site like this it becomes a more critical aspect if you want to get to know someone (or if you want empty praise). The only alternative in a site like this is to make your voice be heard in the Forum, but for the hundreds (1000's?) who don't frequent the board the importance of the physically appealing goes even higher.
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    Apr 27, 2011 3:39 AM GMT
    Ariodante saidPhysical appearance doesn't mean shit in the long run in the real world. In the short run in the real world it gets your foot in the door to meeting people and getting them to know you. In a site like this it becomes a more critical aspect if you want to get to know someone (or if you want empty praise). The only alternative in a site like this is to make your voice be heard in the Forum, but for the hundreds (1000's?) who don't frequent the board the importance of the physically appealing goes even higher.


    Thanks, that makes sense.
  • aiko14

    Posts: 332

    Apr 27, 2011 3:39 AM GMT
    physical appearance = ice breaker
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:08 AM GMT
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:58 AM GMT
    I do definitely feel that good looks help people but I have to say that the inner being is way more important to me. Anyone can like a handsome face but physical appearance will wane as the aging process takes over. But a personality is something that will always be more important. Its someone's personality that pulls me away from "my physical type" and always reminds me that a personality is so much more attractive. =D
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    Apr 27, 2011 5:07 AM GMT
    Both are important. If I would be attracted to the guy physically I'd be aiming high with him, if not, I'd just be friends.
    Physical appearance gives me two options: boyfriend or friend.
    Then comes in the Inner being that will make the difference between being friends/bf or me walking far away from him.
  • zenny

    Posts: 229

    Apr 27, 2011 5:15 AM GMT
    It's really 50/50 for me...if a guy is really hot, but he's a bum living with his parents or something. That's a BIG turn off for me...guys with no ambitions or goals in life besides how big they can get their muscles. If a guy who looks average in appearance, but is successful or has a lot of ambition that's attractive.
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    Apr 27, 2011 5:19 AM GMT
    I prefer that people disregard my inner being.

    cthulhu-6.jpg
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    Apr 27, 2011 5:22 AM GMT
    GentleONE81 saidI ask this cause I notice I will message people online, but I usually don't get a response from people. I assume it's because I don't have a pic of me displaying muscles all over the page. So I just want to see what you guys think about that.


    What type of people are you messaging?
  • Cuchullain

    Posts: 64

    Apr 27, 2011 6:47 AM GMT
    Maybe the 'inner being' and 'loving and caring' thing is setting your sights a bit high for someone you just texted on the gaynets - even on a site as illustrious as "Real Jock".

    Who knows exactly what our subconscious is doing to protect us from shitty dates, but I'd guess my screening goes something like:

    Are you funny?
    Are you masculine?
    Can you read without moving your lips?
    Do you have a speaking voice that I can bear to listen to?
    Do you have anything to say?
    Are you full of yourself?
    Are you full of shit?


    But 'funny' is A-number-one. If you send me a message that makes me laugh, I don't know how I could not reply.
  • andreseward

    Posts: 54

    Apr 27, 2011 6:56 AM GMT
    i think someone's outward appearance should reflect their inner self if possible. if you look like trash, whether it be fashion & hygiene or body weight then you are sending a message to those who dont know you that you may not have all your stuff together.

    i think that people should judge others on their appearance to an extent, because your how you appear to the world is in a large part under your control.
    i guess more like how you present yourself to the world

    as far as the things you cant change about your appearance, if people let those things get in the way of getting to know you, maybe they aren't worth your time. the people who matter in your life are those who care about who you are as a whole, not just aspects of yourself.

    i hope i didnt contradict myself!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 27, 2011 8:53 AM GMT
    Isn't this a site geared to fitness, geared above all to physical appearance?
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    Apr 27, 2011 8:55 AM GMT
    This video will answer your question in it's entirety, I just watched it today from the advice of another forum member:

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    Apr 27, 2011 3:58 PM GMT
    Cuchullain saidMaybe the 'inner being' and 'loving and caring' thing is setting your sights a bit high for someone you just texted on the gaynets - even on a site as illustrious as "Real Jock".

    Who knows exactly what our subconscious is doing to protect us from shitty dates, but I'd guess my screening goes something like:

    Are you funny?
    Are you masculine?
    Can you read without moving your lips?
    Do you have a speaking voice that I can bear to listen to?
    Do you have anything to say?
    Are you full of yourself?
    Are you full of shit?


    But 'funny' is A-number-one. If you send me a message that makes me laugh, I don't know how I could not reply.


    But that's good. So you're just not basing it off of the physical. Even on a site like "Real Jock".
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:01 PM GMT
    Sam52 saidIsn't this a site geared to fitness, geared above all to physical appearance?


    That is true that this site is geared toward physical fitness. But I wanted to know is that a priority when lookin at a guy. Does he have to have almost no close on and super ripped to get attention, or do people actually read profiles and find out a little more of how he is on the inside.
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:34 PM GMT
    brianindenver saidThis video will answer your question in it's entirety, I just watched it today from the advice of another forum member:



    Very good video, and it did answer my question exactly to the point. Thanks for sharing.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:39 PM GMT
    As humans we are attracted to another individual initially on physical attractiveness and likeness. So it's natural to be drawn to some outward appearance and then figure out their inner being afterward. If you're looking for someone to date you don't normally go the guy that's you would consider a 4 if you see yourself as an 8. You do the same with your social life you but yourself around people you feel are like yourself. Therefore most people do the same online as well. If you see someone that you think you would hang out with or date your going to be attracted to their profiles vs someone who doesn't really look like people in your social life.
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:44 PM GMT
    inner being ... it last much longer and is more influential
  • koolnessbox

    Posts: 17

    Apr 27, 2011 4:44 PM GMT
    I'd say inner being. I have come to regard it as the metaphysical equivalent of beer goggles: the more of it involved, the more distracting it is from beauty.

    Very few guys, regardless of looks, can pull off arrogance and annoyance-- in my opinion. However, I find that the more sweet or genuine a guy is, the less I care about their outward appearance.
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:45 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidPhysical appearance doesn't mean shit in the long run in the real world. In the short run in the real world it gets your foot in the door to meeting people and getting them to know you. In a site like this it becomes a more critical aspect if you want to get to know someone (or if you want empty praise). The only alternative in a site like this is to make your voice be heard in the Forum, but for the hundreds (1000's?) who don't frequent the board the importance of the physically appealing goes even higher.


    Completely.
    If you're ugly on the inside... it won't even matter if you're hot because then you're just a sexual object. I understand that's okay for some people, but I like my type to be good on the inside with a few imperfections both places so we compliment each other.
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:51 PM GMT
    Inner groundedness is more important, but you need some of both. Physical attraction is more than a foot in the door - a relationship usually has to have some of this to succeed, long-term. That doesn't mean you have to be a muscle god. It just means that your partner needs to find you attractive, which can mean a lot of different things.
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    Apr 27, 2011 4:59 PM GMT
    Of course "inner self" is important, but unfortunately many people won't take the time to know this if you're not physically attractive to them. Luckily, the latter is subjective and I do believe there is at least someone out there for everybody.

    I agree that having having both is important though. If it's purely just personality, then what you end up having is a friendship (nothing wrong with that!).
  • HopefulMuscle

    Posts: 434

    Apr 27, 2011 5:32 PM GMT
    brianindenver saidThis video will answer your question in it's entirety, I just watched it today from the advice of another forum member:



    Forgive me for sounding like an ass but personally I didnt like the direction this vid took. "I workout so I'm liked more?" I'll be the first to admit that yea I did it for someone else's approval, now I really dont care. I improve myself FOR myself. Not for the recognition of another person. Mainly I train to be stronger and would like to compete in martial arts (but thats beside that point). I live by this one creed:

    "You either love me or hate me"
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    Apr 27, 2011 5:41 PM GMT
    brianindenver saidThis video will answer your question in it's entirety, I just watched it today from the advice of another forum member:



    great video. thanks for sharing!