What kind of guy do you find impossible to approach?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 04, 2008 10:47 PM GMT
    We probably all know the feeling... there is a certain type of guy that we find so incredibly attractive that they seem almost mythical. They are so perfectly our type that just the thought of eye contact or speaking with them makes your heart race, your knees go weak and your tongue to be tied.

    Who is this guy for you? Bonus points if you link an example profile from RJ.

    From a pure physical standpoint, mine is probably this guy

    Note on edit: It's been discovered that this is a fake profile. The profile pics there now are entirely different than when I originally posted this.
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    Apr 04, 2008 11:16 PM GMT
    I wish I could play along but I don't know this feeling. Do you not approach him out of fear of rejection? Thats too much power to hand over to someone you don't know. I'm always curious what my ultimate visual fantasy will sound like when he speaks. I'm curious to see if there is any substance along with all that beauty. I've never been the type that is so taken by someone's physical beauty that I couldn't speak properly. In fact I'm real careful to present myself not as a fan simply stricken by his looks. I'm not much into fawning even though I may privately want to hump his leg like a dog in heat. I'm pretty sure he is aware I find him physically attractive already just by me checking him out and then starting up a casual conversation. He definitely has my attention with all the pretty going on but I'm going to make him earn the rest by putting him on the spot and forcing him to offer more than looks. Try it some time. You may find out it isn't so much that you feel unworthy of having him. You may find out he's not worthy of having you. Or, he might just be a shy guy with a lot of baggage hiding behind all the pretty. Don't ever give anyone some power over you that forces you to remain in the background in life. Take every opportunity in front of you.
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    Apr 04, 2008 11:21 PM GMT
    http://www.realjock.com/profile/?id=50227
    As evidenced by:
    50227_86201.jpg

    Oh, hell, I'd approach him anyway. He's married, I am too, and I need the practice with my slurring, stammering, and awkward small-talk.
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    Apr 04, 2008 11:24 PM GMT
    All of them.

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    Apr 04, 2008 11:26 PM GMT
    jsttennis77 saidI wish I could play along but I don't know this feeling. Do you not approach him out of fear of rejection? Thats too much power to hand over to someone you don't know. I'm always curious what my ultimate visual fantasy will sound like when he speaks. I'm curious to see if there is any substance along with all that beauty. I've never been the type that is so taken by someone's physical beauty that I couldn't speak properly. In fact I'm real careful to present myself not as a fan simply stricken by his looks. I'm not much into fawning even though I may privately want to hump his leg like a dog in heat. I'm pretty sure he is aware I find him physically attractive already just by me checking him out and then starting up a casual conversation. He definitely has my attention with all the pretty going on but I'm going to make him earn the rest by putting him on the spot and forcing him to offer more than looks. Try it some time. You may find out it isn't so much that you feel unworthy of having him. You may find out he's not worthy of having you. Or, he might just be a shy guy with a lot of baggage hiding behind all the pretty. Don't ever give anyone some power over you that forces you to remain in the background in life. Take every opportunity in front of you.



    I don't think I could say it better.

    I used to have the feeling Global Citizen is talking about, but I've learned that I'd rather regret doing something than not doing it.

    If someone piques my interest, I'm all for approaching and finding out more.
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    Apr 04, 2008 11:31 PM GMT
    jsttennis77 saidHe definitely has my attention with all the pretty going on but I'm going to make him earn the rest by putting him on the spot and forcing him to offer more than looks. Try it some time. You may find out it isn't so much that you feel unworthy of having him. You may find out he's not worthy of having you.


    Trust me, you're not telling me anything there. My last date comes to mind. Ten years ago, maybe I didn't realize that. Today, I definitely do. There are some guys who are nice to look at from afar, but just lose their appeal when you start a conversation with them. But there is still that initial sense of awe.

    he might just be a shy guy with a lot of baggage hiding behind all the pretty.

    Very true also. I never would have guessed how many of these there are out there, but one thing about having been around a few years is you begin to see and understand things that you didn't understand when you were 20. I do know that there are many very attractive guys who have baggage. Many don't realize just how attractive they are.

    But let's not get too heavy here. It's Friday and I posted this to start conversation on a fun weekend thread.
  • jarhead5536

    Posts: 1348

    Apr 04, 2008 11:32 PM GMT
    I have found that the key to approaching beautiful men is to talk about something, anything, other than their beauty. These guys know what they look like, and are used to being told so to the point of being bored with it. If you convey that you are actually interested in the mind inside that pretty head, the results are amazing...
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    Apr 04, 2008 11:35 PM GMT
    jarhead5536 said...the mind inside that pretty head...


    The problem isn't HIS mind, it's mine. Attached to my eyes. Hardwired to my breathing. Stoooopid things coming out of my mouth.
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:05 AM GMT
    Gosh...I have a hard time going up and talking to just about anyone. I am really shy when it comes to social situations.
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:11 AM GMT
    Rhodielifter saidGosh...I have a hard time going up and talking to just about anyone. I am really shy when it comes to social situations.

    It kills me how many guys here I see saying that on various threads and I think, "Damn, dude, I'd love to have a guy like you come talk to me."

    We all need to be a bit braver and more sociable.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:23 AM GMT
    Just about all men. I've actually only ever approached one man ever in my life....and apparently he was straight.
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:34 AM GMT
    Anyone with a force field or a 7 point "dispel-evil" hex around them. Those are hard to penetrate!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:35 AM GMT
    i'm allowed to approach other men?
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:37 AM GMT
    Yeah, seems like the hot guys in the bars are usually the hot (edit: straight) ones. LOL.
    I am told I come across as the intimidating straight guy in the gym, but then again I work at a military gym so I don't think I will get hit on there anyway.
    Usually at a bar I just kinda sit back in the corner and watch people. I have to be pretty damn sure someone is interested before I go up and talk to them, basically they have to come up and talk to me...hahaha. I dunno, I do have a fear of rejection like a lot of people. I have always had low self esteem too. My friends say I am crazy and that there is no reason for that, but its easier to say that I will have self esteem than to actually have it!!
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:38 AM GMT
    sickothesame saidAnyone with a force field or a 7 point "dispel-evil" hex around them. Those are hard to penetrate!


    Welcome back, Sicko, you uber-geek. icon_smile.gif
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:39 AM GMT
    Rhodielifter saidI have always had low self esteem too


    Do what? Looking like that?
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:42 AM GMT
    Basically an unfriendly person. I would not want to be around someone who does not want me there. On the other hand I usually only approach someone if there is a reason or some common ground. I won't approach a guy just with the intention of bagging him for example.
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:43 AM GMT
    The only unapproachable person is the one that signals that they don't wanna be approached, therefore, you are all fair game in my book unless otherwise stated.
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    Apr 05, 2008 12:51 AM GMT
    Global_Citizen said

    From a pure physical standpoint, mine is probably this guy:

    82904_221044.jpg


    I also find guys like this hard to approach "from a pure physical standpoint." Mostly because profiles with one unverified picture (that shows a face), no stats, no forum posts, and an age that seems ever so slightly off from the picture means there is no "physical," only "virtual."

    ;)

    But nice picture, yes.

    On the "serious" topic of the thread tho, I have just completed a 10 year personal study which came to the conclusion that 90% of all gay men are passive for one reason or another. And no, I don't mean sexual position. It's self esteem, it's shyness, it's fear of hitting on a straight guy, its the sexual overtones of just saying "hi" in a "gay" venue, it's the desire to be pursued, it's laziness, it's... oh Lordy I could go on for pages.

    So kids, take my advice. Join the 10%. Once you do, it's easy pick'ns. You just have to do ALL the chasing.

    K
  • EricLA

    Posts: 3461

    Apr 05, 2008 12:54 AM GMT
    JSTennis is WAY too well-adjusted for me. I only wish I could feel that way. But, you appear to be a pretty handsome guy. Maybe you were lucky enough not to be exposed to things that undermined your self-esteem and confidence. If you ever put that in pill form, let me know. (In answer to your question, fear of rejection is a big part of it yes.)

    That said, I'm not quite as reluctant as Pivot, but it has to be obvious the guy acknowledges me (rare in itself) and then I have to feel the guy is open to my talking to them.
  • swimbikerun

    Posts: 2835

    Apr 05, 2008 12:58 AM GMT
    iguanaSF said
    I have just completed a 10 year personal study which came to the conclusion that 90% of all gay men are passive for one reason or another. and no, I don't mean sexual position.


    I'd say my field studies also concur. Also, it's kind of a turnoff when I chat a cute up and he gets stuck up and rude (though it doesn't happen often).

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    Apr 05, 2008 1:32 AM GMT
    Danke jp, I swear I'm back for good. The thesis is IN!
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    Apr 05, 2008 1:47 AM GMT
    Rhodielifter saidYeah, seems like the hot guys in the bars are usually the hot ones. LOL.
    I am told I come across as the intimidating straight guy in the gym, but then again I work at a military gym so I don't think I will get hit on there anyway.
    Usually at a bar I just kinda sit back in the corner and watch people. I have to be pretty damn sure someone is interested before I go up and talk to them, basically they have to come up and talk to me...hahaha. I dunno, I do have a fear of rejection like a lot of people. I have always had low self esteem too. My friends say I am crazy and that there is no reason for that, but its easier to say that I will have self esteem than to actually have it!!


    RHODIE!
    If I am ever LUCKY enough to see you out in a bar or a gym I will just FLAT OUT MOB YOU! I have a fascination for and an attraction to the "corner dwellers" and the "shadow watchers"! It has been my experience that they are the "strong silent types" with the most to offer and the deepest personalities....
    I never even considered that you might be "shy" or have "self esteem" issues! I think that makes you all the more ADORABLE! OOPS...OK I gush too much! Just know that you have at least one fan in the community...ME!icon_cool.gif
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    Apr 05, 2008 1:52 AM GMT
    Only the guys I'm attracted to. Funny thing is that there are so many different types of guys that I'm attracted to that the only consistent feature they have is that they aren't attracted to me.
    Of course they also don't approach me either so my shyness apparently makes me invisible. Ooo, now I have a superpower! I've gotta call Stan Lee!
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    Apr 05, 2008 1:55 AM GMT
    bgcat57 saidOnly the guys I'm attracted to. Funny thing is that there are so many different types of guys that I'm attracted to that the only consistent feature they have is that they aren't attracted to me.


    I guess this means it's a bad time to tell you how attractive you are. icon_smile.gif