Who pays on dates?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 4:55 AM GMT
    Or i should say, who should pay on dates? should it be mutual or is there like some unwritten rule for instance that like the top should pay like how a guy usually pays for the girl? Just curious lol. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 4:57 AM GMT
    50/50. This is critical in the beginning.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 4:58 AM GMT
    The top.icon_biggrin.gif

    EDIT:I was sorta j/k but I'm a bottom lol and I've never paid on a date, they always insist to pay so I guess, it's the top after all LOL
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 5:04 AM GMT
    The horniest guy pays.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 5:08 AM GMT
    If I think there will be a second date, then turns should be taken.

    If by the fourth date the taking of turns is diminished there won't be a fifth date. It really pisses me off when guys think I'm gonna foot the bill for them.

    I keep a running tally in my head.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 5:11 AM GMT
    If it is not 50/50, then the one who requested someone's company on a date should be the one to pay.
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    May 02, 2011 5:46 AM GMT
    The more masculine one pays, so it can mirror straight society. Now you know why guys are always looking for masc guys (they're cheap!).



















    Seriously, the one who did the asking should offer to pay, but usually guys will go dutch.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 5:52 AM GMT
    Ariodante said50/50. This is critical in the beginning.

    Yeah, with very few exceptions, so just anticipate you'll be paying 50%.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 5:55 AM GMT
    I'm a poor broke student, so it depends on the guy. I usually try to 50/50 with them but don't hold up much of an argument if they insist on paying since I'm not exactly paying with my own money. icon_lol.gif
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    May 02, 2011 6:20 AM GMT

    I guess it depends on the situation... But for me, I always pay.. It's the gentlemanly thing like to do i guess icon_biggrin.gif
  • bolero_of_fir...

    Posts: 551

    May 02, 2011 6:33 AM GMT
    I always pay and I kind of hate it.
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    May 02, 2011 6:59 AM GMT
    My rule is split it 50/50.

    But if the guy insists on paying it all then by all means, do it. I'm not trying to get a free meal. I'm more concerned about his reactions when I let him pay and whether he actually meant what he said. Some guys just dont say what they mean because it's the "polite" thing to do; I'm trying to avoid that. Say what you mean and mean what you say, fuck the political correctness.
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    May 02, 2011 7:39 AM GMT
    50/50
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    May 02, 2011 8:14 AM GMT
    My thing is, why is it that most guys never discuss who's going to pay beforehand? Like ask..."is it your treat or mine?"

    I remember I was dating this 1 guy for awhile and on our 3rd date I was like, "so which one of us is going to take care of this" prior to walking into the restaurant. He told me, "you're not supposed to ask that". Anyhow...I ended up paying anyway.

    But I wish more guys would talk about it though. Like come to an agreement on who's going to pay. It seems weird to be at the register and not know who's going to pull out the wallet, or have both of us pull out the wallet, or neither one pulls out the wallet....

    But I personally agree, the one who invites pays. That's probably why I'm having such a hard time getting guys from adam4adam to ask me out because they can't talk about it. Every once in awhile you'll get someone honest who says, "look, I don't have any money right now, so it's totally up to you"

    However, the 50/50 deal (or going dutch, even steven) sounds ok but personally that rarely ever works out well nor has it garnished more dates down the line. I think that's better if you are going out as friends. On a date, someone needs to pick up the whole tab. I feel guys like it when someone is treating, whether it be the bottom or the top. And guys also feel good about treating if the know the attraction is there. The top needn't pay for everything and I've had plenty bottoms pay for stuff. That's 1960s thinking and 2 gay men are not a man and woman relationship regardless of who's getting fucked. In addition, why would you want to be sitting with a calculator dividing up the cost, when Pete ordered $20 in food and you only ordered $5? That's not 50/50. Pete's greedy ass should be offering to pay the whole tab. If you feel bad about Pete paying everything, you can offer to leave a tip...

    1st dates should never be more than a coffee or drink so you don't go spending $50 on someone who may not even be into you...

    However, I do believe if it's a significantly younger and older guy, the older one should pay because for the younger guy, spending $50 on a date may mean no food for the rest of the week! I've been there before!
  • ads80

    Posts: 60

    May 02, 2011 11:09 AM GMT
    I think I agree with bits of everyone here, which probably makes me horrendously indecisive.

    I think who asks plays a part.
    I think if you can go even it's a nice idea, but the who asks probably over takes that.
    I think it also has something to do with wealth and the choice of restaurant (simliar idea to Fit4Fit with younger/older).

    My partner was a broke college dude not long ago and still isn't earning heaps so I figure I should pay more... equally, I want him to be able to contribute whenver he can so he doesn't feel guilty... but if I choose a nice restaurant, that's on me...

    ...I'm also a sucker for adorable college dudes it would seem... so it tends to always be on me!
  • alphatop

    Posts: 1955

    May 02, 2011 12:25 PM GMT
    The bitch should pay!icon_twisted.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 12:33 PM GMT
    i automatically offer to pay the bill, McDonalds isn't too expensive lol
  • alphatop

    Posts: 1955

    May 02, 2011 12:34 PM GMT
    holyrood saidi automatically offer to pay the bill, McDonalds isn't too expensive lol


    First date in Mc?? Duh.....icon_confused.gif
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    May 02, 2011 12:35 PM GMT
    AntoNomad said
    holyrood saidi automatically offer to pay the bill, McDonalds isn't too expensive lol


    First date in Mc?? Duh.....icon_confused.gif



    very classy I know lol

    (I was messing of course)
  • alphatop

    Posts: 1955

    May 02, 2011 12:40 PM GMT
    holyrood said
    AntoNomad said
    holyrood saidi automatically offer to pay the bill, McDonalds isn't too expensive lol


    First date in Mc?? Duh.....icon_confused.gif



    very classy I know lol

    (I was messing of course)


    Oh, as long as it's not KFC, it's okicon_lol.gif
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    May 02, 2011 12:41 PM GMT
    Miss Manners would say the person who invited the other to an event would be the one who should be expected to pay the bill.
  • TheAlchemixt

    Posts: 2294

    May 02, 2011 12:41 PM GMT
    If I pay on the date the guy is definitely putting out! If I am at a bar and I buy you a drink your ass better put out as well! It's called manners! Hello!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 12:41 PM GMT
    AntoNomad said
    holyrood said
    AntoNomad said
    holyrood saidi automatically offer to pay the bill, McDonalds isn't too expensive lol


    First date in Mc?? Duh.....icon_confused.gif



    very classy I know lol

    (I was messing of course)


    Oh, as long as it's not KFC, it's okicon_lol.gif


    OMG who in gods name would want to chew on a greasy bone? :-p
    Oh and the colonels secret recipe must be cocaine, surely thats the only thing that would keep people eating that shit
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    May 02, 2011 12:44 PM GMT
    We take turns.....each party should bear part of the responsibility.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2011 12:49 PM GMT
    50/50 in general

    or

    the invitee pays
    (this is especially true if you are the one with more resources and chose to invite someone to a place outside their budget).

    i always come prepared to pay for everything, but if i end up doing that as trend, it won't be a very durable one