Dating Blows

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  May 03, 2011 12:35 AM GMT

  5 dates with a guy, think everything is going smoothly, and he falls off the planet. I wasn't attached by any stretch...but I liked him
  
  
  
  Back to square one. And I only get maybe 3 squares a year.

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• NerdLifter
  
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  May 03, 2011 12:51 AM GMT

  Sounds like gay dating to me! Happens to me Every. Single. Time.
  
  They date you for 1 to 5 dates, first couple dates they profess how cute you are and how they wish they kissed you before you got on the metro. They can't wait to see you again and keep texting/calling/IM'ing, with you barely able to keep up. You go out on a few more dates; their interest is still there; you let yourself start to like them, having protected yourself emotionally since every guy before has disappeared/flaked spontaneously eventually somewhere down the road. Then BAM, moment you start to allow yourself to perhaps invest into this person, they disappear. No reason, no explanation. Proving them to be JUST like every other guy before.

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  May 03, 2011 12:52 AM GMT

  Seems like most men want what they cant have, then once they get it, they dont want it or think they can find something better. I always try to remember a quote a girl at work told me...."the grass may be greener on the otherside of the fence, but that just means its harder to mow"

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  May 03, 2011 1:14 AM GMT

  CTguy1 said5 dates with a guy, think everything is going smoothly, and he falls off the planet. I wasn't attached by any stretch...but I liked him
  
  
  
  Back to square one. And I only get maybe 3 squares a year.

  
  
  ..lucky he fell off the planet.

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• NerdLifter
  
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  May 03, 2011 1:15 AM GMT

  TallsdDude said

  CTguy1 said5 dates with a guy, think everything is going smoothly, and he falls off the planet. I wasn't attached by any stretch...but I liked him
  
  
  
  Back to square one. And I only get maybe 3 squares a year.

  
  
  ..lucky he fell off the planet.

  
  
  

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  May 03, 2011 1:46 AM GMT

  gay men are just fucking Nellie bitches. They can never commit more than a few times and then all of a sudden their life is blasted with issues making them too busy to date.
  
  I hate to seem anti-gay but my patience for f*gs is just falling by the year. I think eventually whats going to happen is I'm going to stop meeting guys unless they are going to pay for my time. Anything else is off limits, no sex, no dancing, no dates. Just pure pay for play...
  
  The times I've resorted just to that had made my life happier and less disappointing.

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  May 03, 2011 1:54 AM GMT

  Sounds like he wasn't one you'd want anyway. Be thankful he fell off the edge of the earth after 3 dates and not 3 years! You can do better, don't give up!

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  May 03, 2011 1:54 AM GMT

  that's happened to a lot of people - myself included
  and it will continue to happen to people... dating doesn't really work if you ask me unless your goal is shits n giggles and casual sex
  for a relationship I think it's best to start as friends... not like bff's but you know what I mean
  next square change your mindset towards it see what happens

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  May 03, 2011 1:58 AM GMT

  So why are we all reliable, down-to-earth good guys here on realjock and all the other gay guys out there are flaky assholes?

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  May 03, 2011 1:59 AM GMT

  some relationships were not meant to be. i hope you at least got to tap it.

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  May 03, 2011 2:02 AM GMT

  haha story of my life..lol

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  May 03, 2011 2:02 AM GMT

  Just happenned to me in the last three weeks...!!!
  
  Don't bother, live your life. If you have time to meet someone, good but don't focus on that....!!! The right person will just step in your everyday life and you won't even notice it!

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  May 03, 2011 2:09 AM GMT

  Don't worry man!!! It happens to all of us. I was recently played and it hurts, but we learn from it. I told my self I'm done dating and was like screw it. But I quickly discovered I can't let someone get to me like that. Buck up, keep your chin up and press forward.

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  May 03, 2011 2:13 AM GMT

  What? He let a hottie like you get away? He's a fucking moron...More for the rest of us!

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  May 03, 2011 2:17 AM GMT

  Oh yea it's no biggie. I'll meet someone new. I just didn't see it coming, there's never any warning sign.
  
  The most annoying part is questions from friends...how's josh?
  
  haha thanks all

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  May 03, 2011 2:27 AM GMT

  From my experience.. I've noticed american men doing this more often than men in other countries.. but to avoid retaliation ill leave it at that...

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  May 03, 2011 2:35 AM GMT

  It happens far too much. When I was a nu-ghey, I made the tragic mistake of following up with said Houdini about why they disappeared. EPIC fail on many levels. *bows head in shame*
  
  As for why it happens and all of the psychological minutia that comes with it, the bottom line is that it's a douche move and if someone acts in that manner, they're complete a waste of time.
  
  However, one can't live one's life in fear of something bad happening. All that you can do is be yourself and be open to things developing if they're worth it. It sucks balls when you get dicked around by someone, but eventually there will be someone who is worth your time and vice versa.

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  May 03, 2011 2:46 AM GMT

  that's why you gotta have a back up. That's just his way of telling you he's not that interested.
  
  Was the sex any good? Lousy sex makes a lousy relationship.
  
  If you did your best there is nothing to regret.
  
  

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  May 03, 2011 2:47 AM GMT

  Yea I haven't heard from him since Friday so I sent him one final text tonight. Everything good Josh? Just in case it was something serious that happened I'll take the high road.
  
  I'll leave it at that. Have a good life guy.

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• BoatnSunshine...
  
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  May 03, 2011 2:51 AM GMT

  most gay men think there is always something better .. atleast he didnt cheat on you ... thats just awesome when they toy with your emotions but are just sleeping with other men , like my ex !!! ha so tired of gay men
  

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• tuffguyndc
  
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  May 03, 2011 2:53 AM GMT

  ha ha ha ha bro, at least you are going on dates. i get meet and greets. then they just want to have sex

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  May 03, 2011 2:55 AM GMT

  CTguy1 saidYea I haven't heard from him since Friday so I sent him one final text tonight. Everything good Josh? Just in case it was something serious that happened I'll take the high road.
  
  I'll leave it at that. Have a good life guy.

  
  
  
  I probably wouldn't have texted "Everything good Josh".. I'm afraid you wont here from him again.. but hopefully I am wrong. Let us know what happens

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  May 03, 2011 2:58 AM GMT

  Tell me about it...dating girls would be so much easier, if only they did it for me...fml.

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  May 03, 2011 2:58 AM GMT

  I meant like...you alright? No death in the family/horrible accident/terrible calamity that would make it excusable.
  
  I hadn't been on grindr in 3 weeks lol I just went on and I've had my fill for the next 3 weeks.

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• EricLA
  
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  May 03, 2011 3:04 AM GMT

  Fit4FitnDenver saidgay men are just fucking Nellie bitches. They can never commit more than a few times and then all of a sudden their life is blasted with issues making them too busy to date.
  
  I hate to seem anti-gay but my patience for f*gs is just falling by the year. I think eventually whats going to happen is I'm going to stop meeting guys unless they are going to pay for my time. Anything else is off limits, no sex, no dancing, no dates. Just pure pay for play...
  
  The times I've resorted just to that had made my life happier and less disappointing.

  
  
  Fit4FitnDenver, if I was dating you and I heard you voice this opinion, it would be an instant turn-off. "I hate to seem anti-gay but...", well, too late, but you sound anti-gay.
  
  I'm not saying dating gay men can't be a challenge. It is. But to generalize a whole group of people is wrong. There may be a problem with how you're meeting them. Maybe you need to a bit more homework on who they are and what their values are before you get very far with them. It saves a lot of time.

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