I ask, in part, because a very good friend whom I love deeply, as a friend - not a romantic or amorous interest - said today that he wants to find a (woman) who "like me, makes Christ the center of her life. I couldn't ever marry a woman who wouldn't pray with me when times got hard, or who didn't make Christ the priority in her life."
This will, to some, be a rather shocking and even extreme statement, but it's critical for him. And I've tried to respect this and see its value, but I also see a VERY lonely man, who is constantly rejecting the interest of women based on this litmus test.
I'm a believer, but not a Christian, and I'm certainly not a scriptural believer as I have endless problems with scripture-based faith of any sort. I personally don't think that The Word is the only word or the final word, or even a whole truth unto itself. However, I would never discount that faith in someone else, nor would I negate it and dismiss it as wrong - only untrue and of no value to me personally. I have, on occasion with my friend, asked him in troubled times if he's prayed - knowing that this is the direction that most centers him - and I've asked him what scripture says about the dilemma he faces and how it might speak to him, and comfort him, and center him and put him at ease and help give him guidance. I don't do it patronizingly, nor do I do it glibly. I know it's his compass and I very sincerely apply my questions to him in this direction because he'll open up, and talk about things more openly, and frankly. I'm not cynical about it - I'm actually quite respectful. I don't pray with him, simply because I don't want to pretend to do something with him that isn't sincere. I want to be completely honest. He knows I don't share his "Christ centered" view of life. And today, he dismissed me rather bluntly saying it was because I did not have Christ at the center of my life. I was taken back by it. I had suggested to him that there may be a woman who sees and feels and believes in something quite different - but who would respect and encourage and support him in his spiritual journey, but was a far better match for him than someone who (his words) "put Christ first in all things, even ahead of our marriage." He said that it was impossible. It was a deal breaker. I said that I couldn't understand how he could dismiss the possibility of loving someone who loved him more than anyone, and whom he also loved, simply because of this mutual belief requirement. I was honestly baffled by it. He said nobody comes ahead of Christ, and so he was waiting for that woman or staying single for all his life.
So, I find it disturbing that in a faith that seeks to set its disciples on a path to care for others - whose christ set example of sacrificing for others NOT to sacrifice for the Godhead, but to do as he did and put others ahead of even himself - that a person with that faith could reject love from someone or even their love toward someone if they didn't believe exactly as the other person believes. I find that very, very sad.