So what would you do if a stranger approached you and asked for a couple of dollars?

  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    May 23, 2011 3:28 AM GMT
    So what would you were in a comfortable place, maybe in a restaurant or just sitting and chatting with a friend and a reasonable looking guy approached you and said he had no money for gas and asked if he could have a couple of bucks? Would you:

    1. Tell him you have no money
    2. Tell him to go away
    3. Give him two or three dollars

    My partner and I were sitting and eating some ice cream at Baskin Robbins, enjoying the day. I never eat ice cream unless it is kind of a special occasion.
    A guy came up and asked us for a couple of bucks. Out of gas and no money with him....
    What do you think we did.. and how would you have responded?
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    May 23, 2011 3:35 AM GMT
    I would give him the money. I know there is a possibility that he is totally lying but its not a lot of money and you know... if he is lying, oh well? I would rather not know.
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    May 23, 2011 3:36 AM GMT
    Out of gas panhandling is the biggest scam. I've been hit with that one so many times in the parking lot at the grocery store. I just say no now..

    All the help agencies ask people NOT to give money because it actually does a disservice. As long as you "keep feeding" them they have no reason to go seek help basically.
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    May 23, 2011 3:45 AM GMT
    Oh good lord, that happens all the time here. Usually, I say " I'm sorry, I can't help you." Very rarely I'll pony up if I'm feeling like an exceptionally soft touch.
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    May 23, 2011 3:48 AM GMT
    Depends on my mood. I've given just as many times as I haven't.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    May 23, 2011 3:52 AM GMT
    Thanks.. interesting answers.....

    The answer.. my partner walked back over to the Quik Trip in back of the Ice Cream Store and paid $3.00 for the gas. Apparently the guy didn't have his wallet and wasn't sure what to do. We thought it odd he didn't call for help, but
    it was $3.00 for gas.

    It wasn't panhandling.
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    May 23, 2011 4:06 AM GMT
    I have been in some very sticky situations in my life but never had I approached someone on the street or someplace and asked for money (if I did and forgot, forgive me Lord for lying!). There was 1 situation awhile back where I was over 200 miles out of town, had lost money and didn't have a single dime for gas. To ask someone for gas made me want to vomit. So I called my bank and explained the situation to them and they actually were able to help me out. I won't say how, but I think the representative on the phone knew how much in despair I was!

    I think it's very annoying to be panhandled. It's like, I came here to wash my car, and I have to pay you? Or...this street is free I gotta pay a toll?

    You have to remember that these people probably have friends or family somewhere. Someone can send something to them. How many times have they asked people for money and they finally said no?

    Some cities have it worse than others. Not a day goes by someone hitting you up for change. That's one reason I detest living in downtown areas.

    I also know of this situation: I know a guy who lives with his mom in a fairly well to do neighborhood in a well-to do 4 bedroom house. She got money. She had enough to pay $500 to bail him out of jail but wouldn't give him shit to keep him in a hotel while he had to get his dental work done.

    Yet he comes up here to Denver sleeping from house to house not doing any work, not even selling his dick and yet he feels that it's better to "panhandle for bus money back home." I have given him bus money before, I've emptied out my change can and gave him $10, bought him lunch and he STILL doesn't improve.

    I say no to panhandlers. Because put it this way: for all the money you're giving out to them you get NOTHING in return. No sex, no food, and certainly no money. And all they'll do is keep on asking for money.

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    May 23, 2011 4:13 AM GMT
    A year or so back a woman suburban Toronto was caught panhandling downtown. Apparently she made good money. She lived in an upscale house and drove fairly new BMW daily

    I was at an intersection waiting for the light when a well dressed middle aged woman knocked on my window and asked if I could give her a couple of bucks because she was on her way to work and had forgotten her purse back home so she needed cash to go back and retrieve it. So I gave it to her.. Next morning there she is again knocking on someone elses car window. When she got the money from them she got back around the corner and when I drove off I could see her handing it over to some guy who was standing there..
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    May 23, 2011 4:20 AM GMT
    I never give anybody money, especially if they're the type of asshole who tries to tell me a whole life story about why they need money. In my mind I'm like "fuck off I don't even have any money you stupid cunt."
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    May 23, 2011 4:30 AM GMT
    A guy once asked me for a buck because he was jobless and wanted to eat. I'm a "teach a guy how to fish instead of giving him a fish" kinda guy, so I did the logical thing.

    I gave him $438,000 to put him through six years of Harvard medical school.

    As soon as I turned around he bought 146,000 40's. Lazy bum.
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    May 23, 2011 4:40 AM GMT
    MuchMoreThanMuscle said...
    There was another time a panhandler asked for money and I had leftovers from a restaurant I had just eaten at. I offered the person my food, and the person retorted back with an indignant, "What is it?!" ...


    For my daily trek around The City, I'm usually packing hard boiled eggs, trail mix, almond butter and jam sandwiches, chocolate, and other healthy yummies. I've offered these to panhandlers and have gotten cussed at. "I didn't ask for no f*ing hard boiled eggs! I asked for money!"

    Beggars can be choosers. However, with me, if they choose to be ungrateful they usually end up empty handed.
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    May 23, 2011 4:45 AM GMT
    I usually ignore them, especially if I'm in my car and they approach it at a stop. But in situations where I can't, I simply say I have no cash on me, which is usually true.

    True story when I once had to beg: I was playing hooky from prep school in 1965, and went into Manhattan. Actually for several days in a row, part of my plan to get myself expelled, which worked. Had lots of fun, went to Radio City to see a movie, saw Goldfinger at the deMille, went to museums, top of the Empire State, all kinds of stuff.

    But when I went to ride the subway to catch my train home from New Jersey one day, all I had left were $20 bills. And at that time, counterfeiting concerns made them unacceptable at subway token stations, or on buses (at 16 I couldn't drive). A taxi couldn't take me to Jersey. And even newspaper stands wouldn't let me buy a newspaper from them, to break the $20. I went into some banks, but without an account there, they wouldn't assist me. Remember, a $20 was a pretty large bill in 1965.

    So being cold outside in late January, I finally went inside a subway station and started begging strangers for 15 cents (I had the rest in coins for the fare, just lacked that much). Now imagine a teenager in business suit & tie, long topcoat over it, leather gloves, snap-brim felt hat, carrying his leather briefcase, begging for money. It took me about 20 minutes to get it (thank gawd the Transit Police didn't notice me), and I got back just in time to make my commuter train home.
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    May 23, 2011 5:16 AM GMT
    Feel him out, if I know he's telling the truth (or think he is) give him a few dollars if I know he's lying tell him I don't have money or say go away in a nice way though (unless they get violent or rude)
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    May 23, 2011 5:17 AM GMT
    I used to drive a cab in a large metropolitan area. I could not stop for gas without being asked for "a couple bucks for gas". the panhandlers knew the cab was a cash business and I had money in my pocket. I always told them to fuck off. Except once. Guy comes up to me and holds out his hand. he says, " Sir, I'm not gonna lie to you, i haven't had a beer in 2 days. Look how bad i'm shaking. I'm 30 cents shy of being able to get a 40. Would you please help me out with 30 cents?"

    I told the guy I appreciated his Honesty and then bought him a six pack.
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    May 23, 2011 5:23 AM GMT
    I try to help them out when I have it. If I have 1's in my wallet i give them a few. Usually 3 dollars. If I have change in my pocket, I always give it to them. I was with a friend the other night, and we were walking to Dinytown at the U of M and a guy asked if we had any change, and immediately my friend said NO!, but I had a bunch of change I didn't want to carry so was happy to give it. My friend never felt so stupid. lol.

    I just would like to give those people the benfit of the doubt. I don't always do it, but most times. I feel bad. What if that was my life and my circumstances? I want to bring good karma into my life.
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    May 23, 2011 5:32 AM GMT
    I give homeless people like $20 when im in a good mood. They might check themselves into a hostel and be warm for the night.....or blow it all on crack, but either way they get to be happier for a night than they would not have otherwise been. icon_cool.gif


    lol I'm a karma guy too.
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    May 23, 2011 1:37 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidThanks.. interesting answers.....

    The answer.. my partner walked back over to the Quik Trip in back of the Ice Cream Store and paid $3.00 for the gas. Apparently the guy didn't have his wallet and wasn't sure what to do. We thought it odd he didn't call for help, but
    it was $3.00 for gas.

    It wasn't panhandling.


    That's really unusual.

    We had a similar experience - we used to live right downtown in DC where people panhandled us every day, multiple times a day. There was this sad looking woman, saying she needed food for her kids. We were in front of a Greek restaurant and offered to buy them all meals. She looked up, wrinkled her nose, and said, "Naah, I don't like that place. Let's go to [the wrap place a couple of blocks away.]" We stared back incredulously - after a minute she asked, "I guess I'm not gonna get my money, am I?" "No, I guess you're not."
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    May 23, 2011 1:42 PM GMT
    Tell him no
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    May 23, 2011 1:50 PM GMT
    Fuck off comes to mind.
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    May 23, 2011 1:50 PM GMT
    1.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 23, 2011 1:52 PM GMT
    Generally I'll say no, as I seldom carry cash on me these days.

    In some cases I will offer to buy the guy a cheap sandwhich at a deli or a
    Subway/Quizmo's.

    I haven't been approached for gas money yet, so I imagine I'd probably refuse on general principle.
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    May 23, 2011 1:56 PM GMT
    A few years ago I gave a few euros to a nice looking lady that asked me on the street. She told me she has a child and no money to feed it. The same day, a few hours later I saw her with a couple of other men and women, drinking beer and eating junk food on a corner of a street. I felt so stupid!

    This is the only time I have ever given money to strangers. And I doubt there will be a second time, but I never say I don't have money. I always just say No!
  • janu88

    Posts: 346

    May 23, 2011 2:00 PM GMT
    I usually give.
    2-5 bucks is not a big money.
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    May 23, 2011 2:10 PM GMT
    I usually say 'go away'.

    In general, I'll give some money to beggars who do not come up to you and ask, but only in non-western countries, ie where there's real undeserved poverty.

    In Canada there's no reason to be homeless and begging - you get welfare, there's BC housing, many homeless people here work all day collecting cans and bottles. Those people sitting on the street with a sign, a bunch of scruffy dogs, claim they have no food yet they apparently have money to put a pound of metal on their face, seriously, fuck off.

    Even in the US, there's plenty of support available if you really want to, even though the line is a little more blurry there than in Europe or Canada.

    I'm against charity in general, really.
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    May 23, 2011 2:13 PM GMT
    Friendsrbetter said
    Running11 said:
    "I want to bring good karma into my life. "


    Kudos for you...best response yet!!


    Except, there is no such thing as karma icon_rolleyes.gif


    EDIT: To the OP, I would have said no. Not because I simply don't want to but I rarely actually have cash on my person.