I know it's over.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 29, 2011 12:27 AM GMT
    I've had been seeing someone for nearly 3 months. We were talking and texting and then one day, nothing. There wasn't a fight, disagreement, or indicator; just silence. I initially didn't think much of it, because he had finals. However, after finals were over there was still silence. So I started doubting myself and tried harder vying for his attention. In hindsight that only made look clingy and needy. But, now it's nearly been one month since we last talked and it doesn't really bother me as much as it did. I still wish he had the courage to break it off instead of leaving me guessing, but that's life. There's no accounting for how someone else will react to a situation. Ultimately, you're the only person you should be accountable for.

    My only question is what do I do know?

    I still have some of his stuff and I would like to give it back to him. Should I just let this stay where it lies?
  • wackinb

    Posts: 1

    May 29, 2011 1:08 AM GMT
    have same experience with u. it is so sad to be that.
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    May 29, 2011 2:00 AM GMT
    Yes, It sucks. But, I'd rather not mope about it. There's better things to invest energy on.
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    May 29, 2011 4:37 AM GMT
    Barca771 saidYes, It sucks. But, I'd rather not mope about it. There's better things to invest energy on.




    ...I think so, too. Put his stuff in a box or two. All taped up. The way he ended things tells you a lot about the kind of man he is. Something tells me that's not the kind of man you aspire to be in a healthy happy relationship with. icon_wink.gif


    -Doug

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    May 30, 2011 4:38 AM GMT
    The mature thing to do with his stuff would be to return it. Drop it off at his apartment or with one of his friends.

    This whole situation is from bizzaro world though. I'd regift or trash it.
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    May 30, 2011 4:41 AM GMT
    I'd call him or text him, asking his address so I could mail it back.

    That makes you look like the bigger man by making it clear that it was over (even though it may seem that way anyways).

    It's kind of like YOUR way of breaking it off officially. It might be good for you to have some closure and come across as though you were the one who ended the relationship.
  • stee99

    Posts: 317

    May 30, 2011 4:46 AM GMT
    bugger spending your money sending his things if he's the one ignoring you.
    being big so someone else can be small gets old fast.
    if he wants the stuff he knows where it is and how to contact you.
    same as you'd contact him if he had things of yours.
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    May 30, 2011 4:49 AM GMT
    seems very immature. yeah i would definetly call just to see whats up....after all you still have his things. Just dont sound desperate though... some man love to feel wanted.
  • joncfernan

    Posts: 216

    May 30, 2011 5:10 AM GMT
    not worth your time man. text him telling him where to send his stuff and clear him out. Be glad you're not gonna be involved with someone like that icon_smile.gif
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    May 30, 2011 5:11 AM GMT
    stee99 saidbugger spending your money sending his things if he's the one ignoring you.
    being big so someone else can be small gets old fast.
    if he wants the stuff he knows where it is and how to contact you.
    same as you'd contact him if he had things of yours.


    still, why would you want some jerk's stuff lying around your place?

    Just drop it off at his house imo.

    Could always tell him to come get it, too.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 30, 2011 5:26 AM GMT
    Barca771 saidI've had been seeing someone for nearly 3 months. We were talking and texting and then one day, nothing. There wasn't a fight, disagreement, or indicator; just silence. I initially didn't think much of it, because he had finals. However, after finals were over there was still silence. So I started doubting myself and tried harder vying for his attention. In hindsight that only made look clingy and needy. But, now it's nearly been one month since we last talked and it doesn't really bother me as much as it did. I still wish he had the courage to break it off instead of leaving me guessing, but that's life. There's no accounting for how someone else will react to a situation. Ultimately, you're the only person you should be accountable for.

    My only question is what do I do know?

    I still have some of his stuff and I would like to give it back to him. Should I just let this stay where it lies?


    Text him and tell him if he wants his stuff he can get it... otherwise you'll give it away to charity icon_smile.gif
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    May 30, 2011 1:28 PM GMT
    Thanks everyone for your advice. I have his address. I just don't want to look like a creeper going to his place. But, I'm going to take the high road and return his things. I have no use for them, nor do I want the burden of his crap looming over my head.

    My coping mechanisms went into full drive when I realized it was over. It's kind of funny how the Asian coldness took over. At this point he's just someone I used to know.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    May 30, 2011 1:33 PM GMT
    Personally I wouldn't take the initiative to return his stuff. He's the one who quit talking to YOU. If he wants his stuff back, let him call you.... then hand it over graciously.

    You've already reached out to him, let him do something back. Why be
    reasonable about his property when he isn't. Let him take some initiative.
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    May 30, 2011 1:49 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan that's a good point. However, I want my space back. I could give his stuff away, but I'm not that vindictive. So I'll leave it at his apartment doorstep. Whatever happens afterwards is not my concern.