Well, I just want to say that I'm tired of drinking, smoking, and doing any other drugs and especially partying. I've been clean for about a two month and feels great waking up enjoying my life being more productive than being lazy and sleeping from being drunk and high all the dam time. However, I feel that I cannot escape my past. My best friends from high school, are a very bad influence on me. I been to therapy for about a month, just to deal with my depression and my unhappiness that drugs and my friends brought me. Every time I hangout with them all they want to do is smoke(getting high) or drink or do some kind of drug either popping acid(which I havent done) or salvia. At first it was fun, but now it has become an addiction. Even doing something simple as playing basketball, tennis, or watching tv and sleeping they need to smoke. Its taken over their lives, and mines at one point till I just had enough and had a mental break down. Ive been avoiding them or trying to have any contact with them but its pretty hard since they live close by me and we go to the same school and have some classes together. Its been about 2 years since I ever seen them clean.

Yeah some of you will say just cut them off, but its pretty hard for me to that. I really lost a lot of my friends I use to have from drug abuse either from my own actions or my friends. I dont really go out anymore like I use to and actually enjoy it. I feel depressed, anxious, and very self conscious at times now since being clean. I'm starting to deal with my problems, but I seem I cant get my friends which I believe are the main cause of the bad influence in my life out of it or out of my life. Even when I hangout with them, and stay clean, they always try to force me to smoke by making me feel bad like he odd man out. I dont know. Im just tired of it. I feel that they just basically follow me around in a sense and I cant get them out of my life.