Tell your story

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 31, 2011 5:04 PM GMT
    I want to encourage :-
    those who are HIV+
    those who have had HIV scares
    and those who had positive contact with persons HIV+

    To please tell your story, through your eyes let’s help to educate the world, dismiss some of the stigmatism and fear.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 01, 2011 8:15 PM GMT
    Just found out I'm positive last week, my husband is negative.

    We've been together 16 years and it was the hardest thing to tell him. But he responded with nothing but love and compassion. As have our friends. I really don't feel any fear, but just a desire to confront this head on.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 03, 2011 6:22 AM GMT
    medfordguy saidJust found out I'm positive last week, my husband is negative.

    We've been together 16 years and it was the hardest thing to tell him. But he responded with nothing but love and compassion. As have our friends. I really don't feel any fear, but just a desire to confront this head on.


    It sounds like you have a good support system, thats very important. Sorry to hear of your news, it happens more than people know. If I can be of any help please let me know. You seem like a great guy, you will be fine man.
  • suedeheadscot

    Posts: 1130

    Jun 03, 2011 6:28 AM GMT
    I've a bit of a weird one : I am HIV- but I get inconclusive results, which started after a condom slipped off (which was bloody great seeing I work in sexual health!!!)

    I remember the agony and tension of having to go for further tests and then finding out I was all clear in the end.

    It really helped to hammer home the message that no-one deserves to have HIV and those that do have it deserve our support.

    I now work in an HIV charity on health promotion and whats worrying is that so many people are going to lose out on education/resources thanks to government cuts.

    Sorry - I know this isn't a great story and maybe not too relevant to the thread but felt I had to have my say!
  • Jericophantom...

    Posts: 185

    Jun 03, 2011 6:33 AM GMT
    I always practice safe sex but when I found out my ex wasn't completely honest about his sexual history I knew I had to get checked this is was my second time since march that I've gotten checked I plan on going every three months so by today (Friday) I should have new results 1st time clean as a whistle lets shoot for 2 wish me luck

  • Twenty_Someth...

    Posts: 1388

    Jun 03, 2011 6:36 AM GMT
    I tested positive for HIV when I donated blood at UCLA my freshman year of college. I had only kissed a guy at that point, so I thought there had to be a mistake. I knew that you couldn't get HIV from kissing, (though I was still scared shitless due to the positive) and when I was tested again they declared that I was negative. They never wanted to take my blood after that though. I disclosed that I was gay when they told me they needed to know everything, and they assummed I was lying about not having slept with guys... Shitty that gays can't donate blood...

    That was a pretty scary experience, but in the end, and ever since I have tested HIV-
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 03, 2011 6:56 AM GMT
    Ive told this many times in other threads here but maybe not enough so here it goes, maybe it'll help someone out there.

    I was involved with a man for 6 yrears. He was the love of my life, everything Id always wanted. Beautiful body, beautiful heart & soul....so it seemed. He took my breath away from our first sight of each other. If soul mates exist I believed he was mine. My kids loved & adored him, family loved him....I loved him with my whole heart.

    Even so, There started to be discrepencies in the relationship. Id catch him in lies, even cases where I knew he had cheated on me, and he would lie about that. We supposedly had a "monogamous" relationship. I went & got checked & sure enough he had given me hiv.

    It hurts to this day that he wasn't ever man enough to admit his faults & what he had done.

    Even so we tried to work it out as we loved each other & were raising our son together. He had no complications from the hiv. By the time I found out my cd 4 was 90 & viral load almost 500k. Thats bad. The dr said she didnt see how i was walking around much less biking with my son & etc. I was also ate up with thrush.

    I was in the hospital 3x since then. My husband couldnt handle the idea of me being sick & him being poz also so he left me & our son & reverted back to his jehovah witness ways saying he wanted to save his soul & live forever.

    Its been the most painful ordeal of my life. I know having hiv is serious, and Im doing great now, remarkable recovery. But my heart still breaks not having him in my life. Even though the actions I have described to you by him are horrible & horrendous he was a beautiful loving man that me, nor my son will ever forget. I miss him every day. I truly loved him no matter what he did.

    Im undetectable now and my cd4 is up to 400. Starting to enjoy my life as a single gay dad is scary but im strong & have alot of fight & many years left in me.

    Being poz has made me appreciate life more, appreciate the small things that go unnoticed. I dont worry so much about material things, as long as I have my son & he has what he needs thats all I care about.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 03, 2011 3:41 PM GMT
    The hard part was telling my husband because we had to face the fact that I had sex outside of our relationship. His response was nothing but love, support and compassion. It didn't matter about the sex, what mattered was that we're together, and he will be there for me, and that I will continue to be there for me. We may have drifted apart a bit sexually, but emotionally, we are very close. With this we are going to have to re-examine our intimacy because now that I know, I want to keep him safe.

    Our friends have been very supportive and non-judgmental, which is helping me deal with this without too much fear. I know this won't be an easy road from here on out, but I think I'll be okay.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 14, 2011 6:30 PM GMT
    Redbull, my heart breaks for you too. I am happy that you have moved forward with your life. Stories like yours give me hope and inspiration in dealing with my HIV.

    Thank you for sharing.