Gay dude created social awkwardness: This time at the gym.......

  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jun 04, 2011 2:13 PM GMT
    Sometimes you just have to shake your head and chuckle. It is one of the aspects of "gay life" that I find a little perplexing... where a guy dude elects a
    differing form of social etiquette which can create awkwardness or even drama.
    I mean why? I don't understand the big deal. I've had several of these kinds of things happen recently.

    This time was last Sunday at the gym. A local gay dude, who is really a "friend of a friend", but is "friended on Facebook" and we have had several conversations about mostly fitness related topics, saw me at the East Wichita YMCA. He and I are both members, but he goes to the West branch. We've never met. He saw me working out at the gym and apparently was even in the same room. I never even noticed him.

    So he sends me a message, first letting me know he saw me last Sunday at the gym and gives me a quickie assessment of how I looked. I thanked him, but said he should have come up and introduced himself (I certainly would have had I been in his place). Instead, he told me, "you were talking to a guy and I wasn't sure what to do". I then got lectured about the fact I didn't even see him.
    I told him he should have said hello and the "guy" was my partner, but that made no difference. I explained that I tend to "zone out" while there and focus on my workouts and he shouldn't be offended I didn't see him. By the end of the conversation, he seemed to be ok with it all.

    And I'm thinking, "I've not even met him before"... I've missed clients of mine at the gym and they weren't offended, even neighbors. I just find some of these
    "dramatized scenes" as a little much. Is it just me or have some of you had similar experiences?
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    Jun 04, 2011 2:18 PM GMT
    Once, but honestly, let them keep it. No time for that crap. icon_biggrin.gif
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 14372

    Jun 04, 2011 2:21 PM GMT
    I don't pay any attention to guys like that. If they are that insecure about saying hello to me than that is their problem. I am in the gym to work out not to socialize.
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    Jun 04, 2011 10:37 PM GMT
    I've had the opposite experience. From another site.. I recognized a guy at my gym. I sent him a message the following day and exchanged a few friendly messages. So the next time I saw him and his partner at the gym, I walked over and introduced myself. Oh man.. He had this deer-in-the-headlights look on his face, and I could tell he felt a little uncomfortable. So I took that as a hint to move on and continue with my workout.

    During my workout, I glance over and I can tell they're having some words with each other. Eventually, they both work their way over to where I was working out. The guy comes over to me and introduces me to his partner. And then asks me to explain to his partner how/where we know each other, and that we're nothing more than friends. EL-OH-EL.

    I decided to play along and told his partner that we're just online friends. Of course, he wasn't paying attention to me and just doing his reps while I'm talking.

    Later that night, I sent him a message and asked what was up. Apparently, the guy didn't tell his partner that he had an online profile. And on top of that, he said his partner is the super jealous private type. So he kinda freaked out when a stranger (me) came up to them.

    After that, I kept my distance whenever I saw them at the gym. And after that experience, I don't approach guys that I recognize, unless they specifically say it's all right to do so. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 04, 2011 10:51 PM GMT
    ...all the more reason to workout at home. icon_biggrin.gif