Is unbelievably confused and in need of help!

  • jamiet

    Posts: 1

    Jun 14, 2011 9:39 PM GMT
    Basically, I'm a uni student in London and we've just had our final exams for the year (thank fuuuck!) but theres a problem, I'm literally infaturated by this guy I was helping through this one exam.

    I offered to help him out, and when he got back from Venice with his best friend (whos female...) he dropped me a text asking for help. Over the next two weeks we both shunned other exams to pass this one, he would literally be wanting to meet up every day and we'd spend majority of the time not working and talking and laughing, even after the exam was over he was still texting me to meet up to revise for the other exams.

    But he started mention stories about fit girls he knew etc (none he'd actually gotten with) and for example if I was down the pub with my mates he would abrubtly ask how many fit girls I was with (who the fuck asks that!).

    Then the exams finished and we went on a night, I was with all my mates and then he said he wasnt going out to celebrate because none of his mates were out, so I told him to join us...he didnt take much encouragement (its nearly midnight by now) and we finally get to the club, half an hour later hes getting with some girl, ten minutes after that hes back over with me and the girls gone home.

    I'm basically a closet bisexual lad and from his body language that night, I felt like I would have got with him (based on a lot of experience ;)

    But for the last two weeks hes been distant, he'd text me back once and then ignore me or not text back at all, but when I see him we cant stop talking but the few times he did text back hes been saying stuff like "oh, only a few more days before I'm back, just keep holding on".

    I have no idea anymore, wouldnt be so much of a problem if, I hadnt almost completely fallen in love with him. FML!! icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Neurons

    Posts: 537

    Jun 15, 2011 12:11 AM GMT
    So I understand your problem, but what do you specifically need help with?
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Jun 15, 2011 1:38 AM GMT
    Dealing with bisexuals is even more complicated than being bisexual. I know it's a new concept for our youth today, gay or str8, but they have this thing called conversation where two people share their views and feelings on a topic. Try telling him where you're at, and how his behaviour is confusing for you. If is ready to come out as bi to you, which he obviously is, he'll be honest. If he bullshits you, move on.
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    Jun 15, 2011 1:39 AM GMT
    I'll read it after you change the font back to black. Sorry but it hurts my eyes.
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    Jun 15, 2011 4:46 AM GMT
    I empathize. It's a really big bitch. icon_sad.gif


    I know that telling you to get over it doesn't really help, been there, done that and failed.

    Just like, come out to him and then deal with the fallout? xD
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    Jun 15, 2011 5:17 AM GMT
    Give it time. Things like this take time to either 1.) come to fruition or 2.) crash and burn. The bottom line, don't force it, and what's meant to happen will happen. Clearly, the guy feels uncomfortable with something, maybe like how "close" you seemed to get with him that one night. So, any more pushing and he's just going to run away.

    The only true way to get things a bit more solid is for you to let him know your sexual preference, BUT do not tell him you have feelings for him. And going the route of bisexual is less threatening than outright gay.
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    Jun 15, 2011 7:24 AM GMT
    I kinda agree at some point with EastCostNAZ, any more pushing could only scare him away if on any chance he is bi at all .... heterosexuals are used to walk with bi or gay sometiems to get into fit chicks pants ;) i can asure you! icon_biggrin.gif

    And the other thing is that seems like you DO have an unbelievable crush on this guy, what makes me think that on 70 percents of your conversations, your vision for the moments might had been blured. Try and act like a friend for a while, act hetero and wait for a while, he might even come out to you before you know it ;)

    P.S.
    EastCoastNAZ said And going the route of bisexual is less threatening than outright gay.

    I agree!