Are there things you feel pressure to do just because your a gay man?

  • cityguy39

    Posts: 967

    Apr 16, 2008 12:15 AM GMT
    For me it was traveling. In my circle of friends I was the last one to go to Europe. Until I went, I didn't really feel like I was apart of them. I felt this on my own, this wasn't something my friends made me feel weird about. But sometimes you can't help but compare yourself to your friends. So many gay men have the money to do extra things. With the clothes, traveling etc, it can be hard not to feel left out. What do you guys think?

    Doug
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    Apr 16, 2008 12:31 AM GMT
    i feel pressured into acting gay because im gay...

    i also feel pressured into sucking dick and making out with boys....but thats not just me icon_razz.gif
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    Apr 16, 2008 2:36 AM GMT
    To be secretive about the fact that I own golf clubs and power tools?

    I kid! I'm out and proud to my gay friends as a golfer and handyman.
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    Apr 16, 2008 2:42 AM GMT
    iguanaSF saidTo be secretive about the fact that I own golf clubs and power tools?

    I kid! I'm out and proud to my gay friends as a golfer and handyman.



    icon_eek.gif

    *Proceed to dock 2 points in notes*
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    Apr 16, 2008 2:44 AM GMT
    iguanaSF saidTo be secretive about the fact that I own golf clubs and power tools?

    I kid! I'm out and proud to my gay friends as a golfer and handyman.


    You GOLF?

    Tell me you don't own any bright green golf slacks and wear a tam o'shanter when you do this.

    Otherwise it's over between us.
  • Thirdbeach

    Posts: 1364

    Apr 16, 2008 2:46 AM GMT
    jprichva said[quote][cite]iguanaSF said[/cite]To be secretive about the fact that I own golf clubs and power tools?

    I kid! I'm out and proud to my gay friends as a golfer and handyman.


    You GOLF?

    Tell me you don't own any bright green golf slacks and wear a tam o'shanter when you do this.

    Otherwise it's over between us.[/quote]

    Maybe he'll wear his leather tool belt for you..
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    Apr 16, 2008 2:47 AM GMT
    Not really, but then I've been a stubborn cuss since the age of 3. I don't think it would have mattered what I was/am/will be I have a tendency to think for myself and do what I want. Even if that means having 4 different kinds of ice cream as I did tonight! icon_biggrin.gif
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    Apr 16, 2008 2:56 AM GMT
    RunintheCity saidNot really, but then I've been a stubborn cuss since the age of 3. I don't think it would have mattered what I was/am/will be I have a tendency to think for myself and do what I want. Even if that means having 4 different kinds of ice cream as I did tonight! icon_biggrin.gif


    Oh, you're a rebel, you are.

    I am too. Sometimes I jaywalk. icon_smile.gif
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    Apr 16, 2008 3:00 AM GMT
    I'm not a rebel...I just don't seem to do or embrace the usual things. (A statement that makes little sense I suppose.) I cannot say I've ever done something just BECAUSE I'm gay (beyond have sex with a man) or felt pressure either.
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    Apr 16, 2008 3:01 AM GMT
    Oh, golly, I was kidding.

    Sorry. icon_sad.gif
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    Apr 16, 2008 3:16 AM GMT
    jprichva saidOh, golly, I was kidding.

    Sorry. icon_sad.gif


    Grrr...one the internet's grueling shortcomings is the lack of easy nuance. icon_lol.gif
  • Hagan_F

    Posts: 210

    Apr 16, 2008 3:24 AM GMT
    I wouldn't say I felt pressured to do anything because I am gay but there are things that I WANTED to do because I am gay (and still do) icon_evil.gif
  • NYCguy74

    Posts: 311

    Apr 16, 2008 3:47 AM GMT
    RunintheCity said I cannot say I've ever done something just BECAUSE I'm gay (beyond have sex with a man)



    Do you have sex with men because you're gay?
    or
    Are you gay because you have sex with men?

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    Apr 16, 2008 3:53 AM GMT
    NYCguy74 saidDo you have sex with men because you're gay?
    or
    Are you gay because you have sex with men?



    I understood RunintheCity to be saying that the sex was the irksome price he had to pay to become gay. Isn't this how it is for most people?
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    Apr 16, 2008 4:51 AM GMT
    jprichva said
    Tell me you don't own any bright green golf slacks and wear a tam o'shanter when you do this.


    Have no fear. I own no special golf wear of any sort, apart from my souvenier Poipu Bay Golf Course polo shirt which they made me buy cause I wasn't wearing a collar when I deigned to step foot on their course: $80.

    ides said
    *Proceed to dock 2 points in notes*.


    You kid (or not) but this is the reaction I get from all gay guys! Minimum an eye roll.

    Sigh.

    Now where did I put that leather tool belt...

    K
  • liftordie

    Posts: 823

    Apr 16, 2008 4:55 AM GMT
    i used to feel pressure to go to the White Party, the Black Party, the Red Party...did i leave out a color. guys would say...'u should come it is a lot of fun' yeah, they were usually the ones so tweaked out of their minds that they wouldn't remember a good time if it came up and 'bumped' them on the head! LOL if i wanna watch tragic train wrecks i will just watch "Flavor of Love"
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:08 AM GMT
    I feel pressured to buy overpriced, undersized designer underwear and cavort about in my livingroom to pulsing, pounding techno music every night, and then stream live video of it on my RealJock profile page...

    ...alas, being gay, I also feel pressured to be a bubble-headed twit who forgets what he's doing before he gets a chance to set up the cam and....


    Oooh! Look! An air fuzzy!!!!

    ::cocks head and stares at dust motes near ceiling::
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:15 AM GMT
    zdrew said
    Oooh! Look! An air fuzzy!!!!

    ::cocks head and stares at dust motes near ceiling::


    Is THAT what those are called? Neato!

    *stops looking for zdrew's video stream, stares at ceiling, expectantly*

    K
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:27 AM GMT
    Cutting hair, I can Im good...But just becuase Im gay people Expect me to do it...same with makup, I can Im good but I dont want to...They expect me to flip my wrists..I had that one brought up...
    But I feal the worst of all is the expect I sleep with any other gay men...at any time..when ever...I feal so degraded when those expectation are put on me...Like even though there my friends and family, they still dont know that first thing about me.
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:29 AM GMT
    cityguy39 saidFor me it was traveling. In my circle of friends I was the last one to go to Europe. Until I went, I didn't really feel like I was apart of them. I felt this on my own, this wasn't something my friends made me feel weird about. But sometimes you can't help but compare yourself to your friends. So many gay men have the money to do extra things. With the clothes, traveling etc, it can be hard not to feel left out. What do you guys think?

    Doug
    Its funny you say that becuase I never Have money and when i do never alittle ectra..Lol So thats an expectation that I don't fill.
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:30 AM GMT
    I feel pressured to wear certain cloths, to act more fem. to act more straight, pressured to listen to shitty house music, go to gay clubs, sleep around, not to sleep around, to diva worship, to know a god damn fucking thing about fashion, to know how to dance, match cloths, TO BE THOSE DAMN INSECURE GIRLS BEST FUCKING FRIEND CUZ SHE CAN'T HAVE ANY KIND OF A RELATIONSHIP WITH A STRAIGHT MAN!!!!!!

    To be in shape,
    to act pretentious
    to be loud
    to be proud
    to be pink
    to be red
    to be positive
    to protect
    to sin
    to be a cunt
    the be a crying arm for girls
    to have insight in these damn girls lives
    to have to be stupid
    to not care about life
    to be superficial
    to be a queen
    to stand up
    to be here
    to be queer
    and to fear that with love brings sickness
    and that love never lasts



    theses are all the things I feel pressured to do and these are only because Im gay.... lets not get into what you are pressure to do as a boyfriend, a brother, a son, a citizen, a human....... We are all pressured by everyone to be a something else.... that we after a while forget what we truly want. to be me? or who they want us to be
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:34 AM GMT
    That sucks, Lenne. My parents still expect me to get hate crimed or die of AIDS...nevermind that I can look after myself and I'm not a raging slut. Fun stuff, no?

    Personally, I'd rather introduce iguanaSF to the fine pleasure of staring at air fuzzies.
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:41 AM GMT
    I can relate to many of your woes, ItsMyLife.

    For me, I'm very glad to have found some great new gay friends. However, there is pressure to act more "gay" and to embrace things that I'm not into, such as the drag scene. I'll take the good with the bad, though. I'd much rather have some good friends with quirks than no friends, at all.
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    Apr 16, 2008 5:41 AM GMT
    zdrew saidThat sucks, Lenne. My parents still expect me to get hate crimed or die of AIDS...nevermind that I can look after myself and I'm not a raging slut. Fun stuff, no?

    Personally, I'd rather introduce iguanaSF to the fine pleasure of staring at air fuzzies.


    Ya ya I hear ya..But think We are not always the ones to blame, when it is our peirs in the community that do such things to make it hard for us to have a clean name.
  • cityguy39

    Posts: 967

    Apr 16, 2008 5:45 AM GMT
    It's my life, great post dudeicon_exclaim.gif

    Doug