Going Straight

  • metta

    Posts: 39077

    Jun 17, 2011 6:28 PM GMT


    http://www.nytimes.com/2011/06/19/magazine/my-ex-gay-friend.html?pagewanted=1&_r=2
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Jun 17, 2011 6:45 PM GMT
    I think it's a little tragic reading that actually. it should have gone the other way, the small lonely town cluthing to a bible spewing things that aren't true, to going to a city and realizing one msut love themselves.
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    Jun 17, 2011 7:42 PM GMT
    Many of our half brothers the bisexuals go the other way around it. They start of as being pseudo heterosexuals, and even many taking a wife and having children, and then in middle age, as being something else, and they then may well wholly give up their hetrosexual lifestyle and start to live a gay one with a member of the same sex; for some reasion they then want to be known as gay? When they are still bisexual, they just now bat for the other team.

    So why not go the other way around too? Start off as a young pseudo homosexual, be an activist, and have a boyfriend when we are young, as many of us do, then hit an age were we have seen way to much, and we walk the other way, with our dicks in controle. In many ways, I took the same path by giving up my gay card at around 25.But.......... I never become straight, because I have never been a bisexual to be allowed that choice, nor did I seek solace in the Bible I rebuked that too.
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    Jun 17, 2011 9:29 PM GMT
    It's obvious that Michael (in the story) does everything 100%. Maybe he still hasn't learned that life isn't quite so black and white. It did make me feel really sorry for Ben to have to endure the invalidation of their entire relationship. I hope they all find some peace in their lives.
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    Jun 17, 2011 10:16 PM GMT
    Ýou know- I doubt that Michael was actually gay after all. I mean, based on what I've read, and looking at his photos, I think that he may have Asperger syndrome. Like he looked slightly uncomfortable with his then boyfriend in the picture, he researched the gay culture hardcore, then his spirituality hardcore. Then he was dismissed from a Buddhist retreat for talking about the bible too much, which talking about a particular subject a lot is a sign of the syndrome. Also, I think I can compare Michael in the article to Dennis Rodman. If I remember correctly, Rodman thought he was gay when he was younger for I believe similar reasons, and he's currently suspected of having Asperger Syndrome.
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    Jun 17, 2011 10:47 PM GMT
    Bullwinklemoos saidÝou know- I doubt that Michael was actually gay after all. I mean, based on what I've read, and looking at his photos, I think that he may have Asperger syndrome. Like he looked slightly uncomfortable with his then boyfriend in the picture, he researched the gay culture hardcore, then his spirituality hardcore. Then he was dismissed from a Buddhist retreat for talking about the bible too much, which talking about a particular subject a lot is a sign of the syndrome. Also, I think I can compare Michael in the article to Dennis Rodman. If I remember correctly, Rodman thought he was gay when he was younger for I believe similar reasons, and he's currently suspected of having Asperger Syndrome.


    Could be true... Asperger's guys dwell on sexuality a lot during general conversations, I sat next to one at work mingled with his friends couldn't go 5 mins without it being brought up...

    but then he explained it's a pretty fascinating subject to them because they have to work to form sexual relationships, mimic social behavior/courting and study it in great detail. They can literally choose to be gay or straight in many cases aren't bound by natural impulses towards either. That and gays are as of yet an unexplained deviation from the norm to them
  • Roughie

    Posts: 14

    Jun 17, 2011 10:55 PM GMT
    In my life I have found everyone to be on a scale.
    0 = totally gay .. would never think of sex with the opposite sex
    100 = totally straight... would never think of sex with the same sex
    at 50, you are totally acceptable to sex with either gender

    Everyone seems to fall somewhere in that scale. Some guys think about
    it but never do it... so maybe they're in the 90's. or the 10's.. others try
    it, didn't like the reality of it, but maybe still stroke off to the thoughts, maybe
    they're in the 20's or 80's..... other's, because of family, etc. can never come out in any way, and are on the down low ( a term used loosely ) so they all fit in there somewhere.

    It's all good folks, just say you like sex. Quite worrying about what others are doing, concentrate on what you are doing, do it right. Make whoever you are with feel good, and in the moment.... I don't really care what past someone has had, if they were married, and came out late, were lucky enough to be born way after me, when you had better chances to be out and proud, without getting tied to a fence and pistol whipped...

    Worry about who you are, and the person you are with...
    Roughie
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    Jun 17, 2011 10:56 PM GMT
    if he wanted to go straight so what
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    Jun 17, 2011 11:03 PM GMT
    he looks miserable in the pic
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    Jun 17, 2011 11:10 PM GMT
    An emotionless black button-up in front of a faux wood panel wall? Yeah, miserable. But whatever suits him. To bad he feels that it's his mission to deny the existence of others now.
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    Jun 17, 2011 11:24 PM GMT
    Anyone who goes from one extreme to another like that....

    .....needs lots of therapy.

    It still makes me very upset. That article was hard to read.
  • denus

    Posts: 46

    Jun 17, 2011 11:35 PM GMT
    It's not being "ex-gay" that bothers me: I never considered sexual orientation to be immutable, so I can believe it is possible to turn from gay to straight. It's extraordinarily disheartening to hear accusations to the effect of "he was never gay".

    However, Michael has become extremely narrow-minded now. He thinks he sees "the Truth" as revealed to him by God, and now thinks that all gays are just blind. That's what happens when you get suckered into a religion that threatens punishment for thoughtcrime.

    Edit: OK, this is worse than I thought: not only is he among the "homos are sinners" crowd, he actively thinks homosexual activities should be punished under criminal law.

    Fuck him. I hope he gets sodomized by an uzi.
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    Jun 18, 2011 12:19 AM GMT
    Sounds like a right nutter.
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    Jun 18, 2011 12:23 AM GMT
    Wierd...
  • MrPapo317

    Posts: 515

    Jun 18, 2011 12:29 AM GMT
    jusTom saidhe looks miserable in the pic


    i agree. its kinda sad that he put ben through that
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    Jun 18, 2011 12:33 AM GMT
    The trigger was the health scare with his heart. Being that he lost his parents so young, he was introduced to "mortality" at a very hard time during development. We already know the effect of stress on the mind, so compound that with loss and a health event and you get a prime candidate for this type of extreme swing. More than anything, I feel really bad for the guy. It still doesn't feel like he has found himself and that is a miserable place to be.
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    Jun 18, 2011 12:43 AM GMT
    His hands are enormous, and you know what that means. icon_cool.gif
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    Jun 18, 2011 12:55 AM GMT
    Gym_bull saidUgh, why should gender matter? If you like some one go out with them, who gives a shit if its two dudes? I don't I'm bisexual, and I date both, and I don't give a shit about what others say icon_razz.gif



    Because people (some people) need to feel like they're making the right decisions in life. The more people they can get to agree with them, the more validation it provides them. It's the very root of most religions, political parties, etc. So only the very secure make decisions without trying to cram it down everyone else's throat.
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    Jun 18, 2011 4:37 AM GMT
    Wow, this is so horrible that someone so mixed up could be able to represent a mindset of gay to straight I'll have to think a little more about what to say.

    Suffice to say it's the same psycho-babble that tells us somehow straight people can be recruited into being gay.

    Yeah.

    Right.

    icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Jun 18, 2011 5:46 AM GMT
    He's deluded himself into thinking he is not gay. If being gay was a choice, he could just chose to be straight again and not need to lead a holy crusade against homosexuality. Come on, if its that easy to just switch, it shouldn't take so much.

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    Jun 18, 2011 10:09 PM GMT
    I'd go straight for a night just to impregnate a chick.
  • PhillyGinger

    Posts: 35

    Jun 18, 2011 10:35 PM GMT
    Disturbing article. That guy seems very creepy.
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    Jun 19, 2011 1:06 AM GMT
    I bet he could turn Dahmer in a heart beat!

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    Jun 19, 2011 1:51 AM GMT
    This Michael is a very very troubled person desperately seeking who 'Michael' really is and not happy at all with 'Michael' as is shown by his going from one extreme to the other. I won't be surprised to read that he's committed suicide at some point in the future. I doubt anyone who claims he turns on being gay then turns it off like a light switch. I feel sorry for the poor guy and those who follow his misguided advise.
  • trentmro

    Posts: 2

    Jun 20, 2011 8:28 AM GMT
    http://www.truthwinsout.org/blog/2009/10/4325/

    i wish the nytimes article mentioned his recent comments... the stuff he writes puts his "transformation" in context