have you been in same situation before??...

  • kemoze

    Posts: 390

    Jun 21, 2011 8:27 PM GMT
    guys please dont criticize me , i am tired from a long hard interesting working day so please be nice to me today ....
    so , i know i have posted this before but every time i forget to choose the dating and relationship field so i posted this before in all gay forums...
    but this time i wanna up date this forum
    this is the first one ( old version )
    (i wanted to go to an open country to fall in love without fear, but love came to my office when this guy ( indain ) has been hired in the department next to mine,
    i loved him the first time i looked at his face. till now i am suffering ,
    yeah , i am not out of the closet and he is 29 old , has a son, but i do love him , he is indian and i see him the most attractive guy i have ever seen in my life ( i dont know why lots of pple avoid asians or indians or ..... ) he is really attractive , he has a great personality, i didnt masturebate since i have met him... i just love him , love his talks, smell, everything about him
    but i got only pain,, i texted him as a colleague but were only simple messages,
    i dont know what to do ... i love him , i wish at least to be friends ,, i dont care about sex..,, i just wanna be close...
    and more , i started to change myself.. for example i like having fun all the time even at my office i like to share talks and laugh with my colleagues in the accounting department ,,, but now i started to be more stricket at work, maybe cuz of the love i feel , or i feel like its a bad habit and i wanna change it.. i love him .,, guys , i cant forget him .. guys he is working with me ,, means i have to meet and talk to him everyday,,, guys is it possible to be at least friends .. and we have an age difference of 7 years,, lol
    so, if i wanna it to work out what should i do ,,,???
    does love change you guys.....
    if you are in a situation like this ( love from one side only ) what would you do ??
    but as you know this is out of control,, who controls his heart , no body,)


    yesterday i decided not to talk to him again ... i cant follow something unreal , i love him ok. but what all i get is pain so better stay away as far as possibe..........he tried to talk to me but i was really busy all the time so he left after only five minutes trying to open a conversation with me .. but he doesnt understand whats inside me .. so i hope he goes away from me,.. he has a family,,

    have you guys been in the same situation , when you love someone badly and they dont know or they ignore your love..
    its not about sex at all ..

    whey its hard for me ..
    good night guys ...
    i am really tired and suffocating ..


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 21, 2011 9:52 PM GMT
    sounds more like your in love with the "idea of him." more specifically, the romantic notion of living openly as you stated in your post.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 21, 2011 10:25 PM GMT
    sounds like desperation.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 21, 2011 10:56 PM GMT
    It sounds like a CRUSH, and since it's not his problem, and he doesn't even know; it is your responsibility to gain control of it. That could mean not speaking to him, seeking employment else where, or bringing him into the fun by telling him. I don't recommend option 3. He never did anything but be the object of your affections. If he's not outwardly gay, don't involve him. I strongly recommend option 2. Remove the possibility of making him anguish over this because it is painful to be the apple of one's eye you don't or can't feel the same for, and can't help.
    ...........................................................................................

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 21, 2011 11:26 PM GMT
    Bud, I'm not saying this to be mean, but out of concern for you.

    Are you sure you are not developing not just a crush but an obsession with this man???

    What do you know about him??

    Why do you believe you are in love with him???

    Why are you allowing this situation to control your emotions/actions in a very real and self deprivating way??

    He has a wife and children, those were the life choices HE made. Even if he was gay, leave it be because now you are not just dealing with one man you are dealing with his wife and children which is wrong to do them!!!

    It sucks when you love someone and they do not share in your feelings, but the reality is, you're going to just have to move one and get over it. In order to do so I would advise keeping your distance for a while. Calm down and look for a man who is available and attainable. You are meant for love...I just don't think it's with this guy.

    I think a professional massage, hot bath, good food, and a couple of deep breaths are just what the doctor ordered. Take a break, step back and evaluate the situation using your head NOT your heart. The heart is fickle and has no regaurd for consequences.

    Always with love my friend. icon_smile.gif

  • kemoze

    Posts: 390

    Jun 22, 2011 2:54 AM GMT
    [quote][cite]paulflexes said[/cite]sounds like desperation.[/quotec

    actually its a mixture of love, desperation, confusion and pain....

    but acually i have learnt a lot from this experience and still learning from it
  • kemoze

    Posts: 390

    Jun 22, 2011 3:01 AM GMT
    Stolenname saidBud, I'm not saying this to be mean, but out of concern for you.

    Are you sure you are not developing not just a crush but an obsession with this man???

    What do you know about him??

    Why do you believe you are in love with him???

    Why are you allowing this situation to control your emotions/actions in a very real and self deprivating way??

    He has a wife and children, those were the life choices HE made. Even if he was gay, leave it be because now you are not just dealing with one man you are dealing with his wife and children which is wrong to do them!!!

    It sucks when you love someone and they do not share in your feelings, but the reality is, you're going to just have to move one and get over it. In order to do so I would advise keeping your distance for a while. Calm down and look for a man who is available and attainable. You are meant for love...I just don't think it's with this guy.

    I think a professional massage, hot bath, good food, and a couple of deep breaths are just what the doctor ordered. Take a break, step back and evaluate the situation using your head NOT your heart. The heart is fickle and has no regaurd for consequences.

    Always with love my friend. icon_smile.gif



    i know its a crush, but i cant control myself , its love at first look ,
    i know i cant approach him cuz of his family ,,, and i have decided this already , i no longer talk to him ... i dont wanna hurt myself and his family too , for moving on .i cant leave my job for that reason , i like my job and the place and pple there, so i am trying to get over this...
    but i still love him..
    i do know little about him , but the problem is , the moren i know him , the more i love him ... i dont wanna know anymore ,, this is enough ,,
    but really i have learnt a lot from this love experience.,,,

    now i know exactly what i want in my personal life, its only love ,,,
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 22, 2011 4:12 AM GMT


    " i didnt masturebate since i have met him." This may not have been a good idea, as it is a tension reliever specific to you and no one else.