Batesville Daily Guard, Arkansas Paper, Omits Gay Man's Partner Of 10 Years From Obituary

  • metta

    Posts: 39104

    Jun 22, 2011 6:42 PM GMT
    Batesville Daily Guard, Arkansas Paper, Omits Gay Man's Partner From Obituary

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/06/22/arkansas-obituary-partner_n_882077.html


    Batesville Daiy 870-793-2383
    http://www.guardonline.com/content/contact-us

    Angelia Roberts Managing Editor news@guardonline.com
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    Jun 22, 2011 7:32 PM GMT
    This is no surprise.
    Arkansas is one of the top 5 stupidest (and most bigoted) states in the US.
    I'm fucking happy as hell to say I left that god-forsaken state years ago.
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    Jun 22, 2011 7:33 PM GMT
    Awful
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    Jun 22, 2011 7:47 PM GMT
    Meh. Did you read the whole story? The paper was just adhering to its normal policy.
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Jun 22, 2011 7:57 PM GMT
    So Sad.

    Arkansas makes new orleans look like a liberal cultural mecca by comparison.
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    Jun 22, 2011 9:11 PM GMT
    Thanks for providing the story and especially the contact information for the editor.

    Here is the email I sent:

    Dear Angelina Roberts, Managing Editor

    I encourage you to revise your policy of not including unrecognized partners in obituaries. I do understand that you do this to only recognize legal spouses, however I believe it is important that you realize that this policy does not work for people who are in same-sex loving relatinships because they are not allowed to be married legally. Their love is the same and they should be respected in the obituaries, as the deceased person would want it that way. It seems that a better policy would be to allow the person to decide (as long as they could plan in advance) or to allow the family to decide who is mentioned in the obituary. You will be paying a great honor and respect to love, which is one of the highest services we can provide in this world.


    --
    -Rob
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    Jun 22, 2011 10:57 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidThis is no surprise.
    Arkansas is one of the top 5 stupidest (and most bigoted) states in the US.
    I'm fucking happy as hell to say I left that god-forsaken state years ago.


    Must be why free willy Bill Clinton was such a cock up then....
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    Jun 22, 2011 10:59 PM GMT
    Even though I'm in a 20+ year relationship, not sure it would be an issue for us, we try not to sweat the little stuff.
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    Jun 22, 2011 11:12 PM GMT
    True_blue_aussie said
    paulflexes saidThis is no surprise.
    Arkansas is one of the top 5 stupidest (and most bigoted) states in the US.
    I'm fucking happy as hell to say I left that god-forsaken state years ago.


    Must be why free willy Bill Clinton was such a cock up then....


    I know, right? Every day I thank (the one true Christian) God that the right-wingers in government never commit adultery!
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jun 22, 2011 11:17 PM GMT
    Great job Rockbiter.. glad you didn't just talk, but did something very productive. Your letter sounded very reasonable. Thanks for that.
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    Jun 22, 2011 11:53 PM GMT
    For what it's worth, when my late partner died in 2004, I chose a funeral home in Minnesota. I wrote the obit myself, that they published. They told me the local papers would not accept "partner," so I had to settle for "dear friend" for myself. At least our friends who read it knew what it meant.

    Actually the funeral home was very good. I went there with our best gay friends, a couple who were with me when he died. And they helped me get through the ordeal of planning, the funeral home very understanding. I never felt discriminated against by them, but I understood the larger community resistance, that we had to accommodate, like it or not.

    But at least I was mentioned in the published obituary, and got to arrange the memorial service we had at the chapel of that funeral home a week later. (He was cremated per his wishes, and so no funeral service)

    Damn I hate to make these sort of concessions, but what can we do? Your partner dies, and then what do you do? Until you've been there, in those circumstances, I hope you will not criticize or second-guess me.

    I HATE being gay in the US of today. That forces me to do such things, when I should have better options, and better respect shown to my late partner. Unfortunately, this is the reality of Republican America, and we must just accept it, at least for now.
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    Jun 23, 2011 12:08 AM GMT
    theantijock saidNice letter Rock.

    JackNWNJ saidMeh. Did you read the whole story? The paper was just adhering to its normal policy.


    http://www.cafemom.com/group/99198/forums/read/14341126/Batesville_Daily_Guard_Arkansas_Paper_Omits_Gay_Mans_Partner_From_Obituary

    Oscar Jones conceded, however, that the paper's policy "should be reviewed."

    So much for your Meh, huh?

    For anyone who actually thinks they can affect how the world treats us instead of mehing our being treated as less than 100% human beings...

    Batesville Daily Guard Inc, Batesville Guard Record, Guard Record
    258 W Main Street
    Batesville, AR 72501-6730
    Phone ( 870) 793-2383




    A family owned company since the 1800s.

    BATESVILLE GUARD-RECORD COMPANY, INC

    O. E. JONES , President & Chairman of the board
    JO CARGILL , Vice-President
    JO CARGILL , Secretary
    http://www.facebook.com/people/Jo-Cargill/1330614248
    PAT JONES , Treasurer
    PAT JONES , Controller


    Yes, the paper said it will review their policy. They were only being consistent with their present policy - the paper has nothing to apologize for.

    The story is unclear about paid obits, however, if they have them. It only mentioned free obits.
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Jun 23, 2011 1:13 AM GMT
    Bill Clinton is the exception to the rule in Arkansas.

    Don't forget, it's also the same state that produced Mike Huckabee.....
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Jun 23, 2011 1:13 AM GMT
    Bill Clinton is the exception to the rule in Arkansas.

    Don't forget, it's also the same state that produced Mike Huckabee.....
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    Jun 23, 2011 1:21 AM GMT
    theantijock said
    JackNWNJ saidYes, the paper said it will review their policy. They were only being consistent with their present policy - the paper has nothing to apologize for.


    Being jaded does not advance civil rights.


    You are correct. So a "live and let live" stance is preferable. The paper is a private business, and the owners run it the way they see fit. To insist and demand that they conform to someone else's ideas is pure fascism.
  • BeingThePhoen...

    Posts: 1157

    Jun 23, 2011 2:06 AM GMT
    JackNWNJ said
    theantijock said
    JackNWNJ saidYes, the paper said it will review their policy. They were only being consistent with their present policy - the paper has nothing to apologize for.


    Being jaded does not advance civil rights.


    You are correct. So a "live and let live" stance is preferable. The paper is a private business, and the owners run it the way they see fit. To insist and demand that they conform to someone else's ideas is pure fascism.

    It is fascism right up till the point that it is you who are being omitted from the obit, right? I hear these stories alot, especially from concervatives, about how it is the business' right to do as they wish, until they do something to directly harm them. Then it is an all out war. To be this disrespectful to a man in this situation is completely unacceptable and is a slap in the face of all of us who have come close to losing our lovers, partners, "husbands"...etc. People say they don't want our types of relationships thrown up in their faces, but then they do crap like this that force us to do just that.

    Rant Complete. Chill Cycle Activated...lol.
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    Jun 23, 2011 8:33 AM GMT
    torrentprime said
    True_blue_aussie said
    paulflexes saidThis is no surprise.
    Arkansas is one of the top 5 stupidest (and most bigoted) states in the US.
    I'm fucking happy as hell to say I left that god-forsaken state years ago.


    Must be why free willy Bill Clinton was such a cock up then....


    I know, right? Every day I thank (the one true Christian) God that the right-wingers in government never commit adultery!

    Lets not forget JFK, either.

    But then they don't all turn the White House into the Dirtiest little whorehouse in Washinton! But Bill also was to bring the position he held as president in to disrepute, by lying about it under oath. Oh and your words did not take away Bills sins either, as he was worse than many, many republican presidents, as was JFK and those bloody Kennedys.
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    Jun 23, 2011 8:36 AM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidGreat job Rockbiter.. glad you didn't just talk, but did something very productive. Your letter sounded very reasonable. Thanks for that.


    It's nice when we hear what we want to. Suppose thats why some here try so hard to rid RJ of anything that leans to the right, so they only hear what they want, no matter how much propaganda it may behold, just so they feel they are right.icon_wink.gif
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    Jun 23, 2011 8:58 AM GMT
    True_blue_aussie said
    torrentprime said
    True_blue_aussie said
    paulflexes saidThis is no surprise.
    Arkansas is one of the top 5 stupidest (and most bigoted) states in the US.
    I'm fucking happy as hell to say I left that god-forsaken state years ago.


    Must be why free willy Bill Clinton was such a cock up then....


    I know, right? Every day I thank (the one true Christian) God that the right-wingers in government never commit adultery!

    Lets not forget JFK, either.

    But then they don't all turn the White House into the Dirtiest little whorehouse in Texas. But Bill also was to bring the position he held as president in to disrepute, by lying about it under oath. Oh and your words did not take away Bills sins either, as he was worse than many, many republican presidents, as was JFK and those bloody Kennedys.

    And Vitter, Craig, Ensign, Lee, Foley, Rep. Allen? Don't count? And yes, I know: Edwards, Weiner, etc. This means fuck-all when it comes to what we elect them to do, but it's important to pretend we're electing sexual saints and not stewards of our government.

    Sins? Sorry, I'll leave the religious and metaphysical fantasies in the churches and/or fiction rack, and deal with the real world. Clinton lied under oath? Absolutely true, and absolutely wrong of him - legally and as a matter of respect for his office. No disagreement there. Has nothing to do with his actual record as president, of course, but after 8 years of Bush, I can understand why the right would rather focus on anything but one's actual record of wars, economic growth/contraction, fiscal responsibility, etc. Much easier to start and end discussions with sexual score-keeping.
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    Jun 23, 2011 9:18 AM GMT
    As one said. I'm sure this would not effect my Husband and I of 20+ years, because we don't sweat the small stuff.