Why do some guys have to act so pretentious just because they don't wanna seem "easy"?

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    Jun 27, 2011 8:28 AM GMT
    So went out tonight; had a good time did my thing got a couple numbers whatever.

    Well there's a guy I met over 2 weeks ago on the dancefloor.We had a quick chat and danced a bit. I didn't ask him to dance, but we just happened to be nearby and started dancing. In that time he was like, "well I have a boyfriend so It's not like I'm going to let you grind all up on me". I was like whatever hahaha. Then like halfway thru the night he's like, "well I gotta go find my friends".

    Fast forward 2 weeks later, he comes up to me on the dancefloor and is like, "Hey Brian. That's what it is right?" For a moment I paused and stared because I couldn't for the heck of me remember who this guy was but he looked familiar. But like a couple seconds later I remember and I was like, OH yeah I remember from (insert name of club).

    Well then he's like, "what's my name?" I was like...run it by me again. Then he gets like all funny and is like, "I can't believe you..." I was like, "when someone tells me their name a second time seeing each other I never forget. So what is it again?" He's like...nope, I'm going to let you figure it out. I'm like okay he's just being funny.

    Well we dance towards the end of the night. Night is over and I ask again, "so what is your name again?" He won't tell me. Then I tell him, "look...last time we met we never exchanged numbers so it's not like I had it written down. Plus you told me you had a boyfriend". He's like, "Oh I NEVER said he was my boyfriend. We're just talking"

    Then he says, "I don't give my number out to strangers" or something along that line. So finally I just told him, "I'm going to call you adam". He's like, OKAY!

    I was going along with it in the club but then afterwards I'm like what the fuck is wrong with him? Like is that really necessary to be acting like that? You came up to me and remembered my name, great. Well atleast extend the courtesy to do the same. I know clubs lack common courtesy but that type of behavior doesn't give a good impression.
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    Jun 27, 2011 8:31 AM GMT
    Then there's the other guy. 2nd time I've seen him in the club. We first met as a hookup.

    Well he comes up to me, "Heeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy sexy!" All over me being super friendly. But then after the club it's like it never happened. I even told him that tonight. I was like, "you do this everytime you see me but when I try to contact you to meet again you never follow thru?"

    It makes me think, are you pulling a front for your friends or X boyfriend or what? I mean...don't come hugging all up on me telling me how good I look and then afterwards you can't be bothered.
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    Jun 27, 2011 9:22 AM GMT

    That pretense is an alcohol induced wall of insecurity. Again, I'm scared; I'm hoping it was the alcohol that made them act like this because reading that made me want to smash things. I don't know how I'd fair in real life. I'd probably stop going to clubs and order in. Well, that is eventually what I started doing. People do dress up to go out, but that is where the similarities to church end. No one is obligated to act like a human being and in my experience also, they didn't. On top of that, I'm supposed to pay for the experience; I'd rather rent a movie. icon_surprised.gif

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    Jun 27, 2011 9:46 AM GMT
    cold saidLike are you starting to like notice that the common denominator in all these like shitty situations you post about is like you?


    Brrrr, did it just get cold in here? icon_lol.gif

    ................................Ice+Queen.jpg
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    Jun 27, 2011 10:26 AM GMT
    It sounds like you tried way to hard to get to know him and he's playing games with you. He's a douche, on to the next one icon_razz.gif
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    Jun 27, 2011 10:50 AM GMT
    I wouldn't expect any kind of normal, humane behavior in a gay,nightclub environment. It's the nature of the beast.

    So went out tonight; had a good time did my thing got a couple numbers whatever.

    If you had a good time and got a couple of numbers, I would say the evening was a success. People are who they are and I would conduct myself with dignity.

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    Jun 27, 2011 10:53 AM GMT
    cold saidWhen are you going to notice that the common denominator in all these like shitty situations you post about is like you?


    icon_rolleyes.gif changed it a bit.. but it´s about right
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    Jun 27, 2011 12:01 PM GMT
    I know a bunch of guys who like to play game and play hard to get. They are so good at it everyone got tired of them. And the longest relationship they had 4 5 months max. Those need to change or vanish for a better world.

    As for second guy, God knows what he wants. Ask him. That's the only way your gonna get the answer.
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    Jun 27, 2011 4:08 PM GMT
    man...i can't believe i just read all that foolishness...well anyway i totally agree with cute little asian alistar...those that play games now are bound to play games later icon_wink.gif
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    Jun 27, 2011 5:45 PM GMT
    Trollileo said
    Iron_Casanova said
    cold saidLike are you starting to like notice that the common denominator in all these like shitty situations you post about is like you?


    Brrrr, did it just get cold in here? icon_lol.gif

    ................................Ice+Queen.jpg
    The White Witch of Narnia schlicks with an icicle.


    Sick movie!
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    Jun 27, 2011 5:50 PM GMT
    lol. I only clicked on this thread to see if fitindenver wrote it. he did.
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    Jun 27, 2011 9:03 PM GMT
    cold said
    Lostboy said
    cold saidWhen are you going to notice that the common denominator in all these like shitty situations you post about is like you?


    icon_rolleyes.gif changed it a bit.. but it´s about right


    My post was intentionally poorly written.


    I completely agree, the biggest factor in the xxxx post about problems this guy has, is himself.
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    Jun 28, 2011 9:04 AM GMT
    Well I never said it was a problem though did I?

    But yeah I guess it wasn't a bad night. But compared to going out to the straight Swedish party the other night where I was the only GAY BLACK person in there, they seemed 10X more friendly and they were all drunk. Couple of the straight guys even approached me, offered their name and actually had a conversation.

    Sometimes I wonder about the gay lifestyle. But then again it could be the nightclubs.

    alastiar saidI know a bunch of guys who like to play game and play hard to get. They are so good at it everyone got tired of them. And the longest relationship they had 4 5 months max. Those need to change or vanish for a better world.

    As for second guy, God knows what he wants. Ask him. That's the only way your gonna get the answer.


    I just tried to text the guy in the 2nd post...no response.

    That's why I am glad to be able to get my weekly dose of being around straight people for a change. They are far less pretentious acting. Straight men don't usually play hard to get with another guy!

    For example, I approached a guy last night in a non-aggressive manner. Just walked by and complimented him. I asked him, "so did you come here alone?" He was mumbled, "yeah..." and then started looking at his phone. I walked away immediately as obviously he wasn't interested.

    But straight guys...atleast they'll say, "hey what's your name? I'm ______" I know because a straight guy said the very same thing that same night even though he wasn't interested in me romantically!
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    Jun 29, 2011 11:09 PM GMT
    Fit4FitnDenver saidWell I never said it was a problem though did I?

    But yeah I guess it wasn't a bad night. But compared to going out to the straight Swedish party the other night where I was the only GAY BLACK person in there, they seemed 10X more friendly and they were all drunk. Couple of the straight guys even approached me, offered their name and actually had a conversation.

    Sometimes I wonder about the gay lifestyle. But then again it could be the nightclubs.

    alastiar saidI know a bunch of guys who like to play game and play hard to get. They are so good at it everyone got tired of them. And the longest relationship they had 4 5 months max. Those need to change or vanish for a better world.

    As for second guy, God knows what he wants. Ask him. That's the only way your gonna get the answer.


    I just tried to text the guy in the 2nd post...no response.

    That's why I am glad to be able to get my weekly dose of being around straight people for a change. They are far less pretentious acting. Straight men don't usually play hard to get with another guy!

    For example, I approached a guy last night in a non-aggressive manner. Just walked by and complimented him. I asked him, "so did you come here alone?" He was mumbled, "yeah..." and then started looking at his phone. I walked away immediately as obviously he wasn't interested.

    But straight guys...atleast they'll say, "hey what's your name? I'm ______" I know because a straight guy said the very same thing that same night even though he wasn't interested in me romantically!


    I've never been to a gay nightclub yet but I assume it's just how the guys are in that setting, well some of them anyway. Personally, if they play games like that all the time, I'd say they aren't worth the time and find someone else which in your case, I'm sure you'd have no trouble doing haha