He broke my heart, up and left

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:05 AM GMT
    About 11 months ago...

    This guy walked up to me and professed his love for me and I was blown away. Yes he was attractive but not my type physically (different race) but I grew to quickly love him for his personality more than his body. Anyways he was thinking of taking a job in Canada, and he really loves Canada, so he took it and we maintained things by skyping and talking on the phone. Then randomly things kinda got watered down over a 2 week period 9 months in, where I would only receive short answers when talking/messaging him etc.

    Out of the blue i was unfriended on facebook, blocked on skype, and my phone number was blocked when calling him. Basically he vanished but It was intentional, I have a friend out that way confirm that he is fine, you know not dead, kidnapped whatever.

    I don't understand, I'm going to assume he met someone else but i'm scared to confirm it or anything. Basically do i go flip a bitch at him or take the hint and let him go...

    I really liked him

    xo
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:07 AM GMT
    Phew those are the worst aint though, when its so sudden and without actually discussing whats going on... Sorry to hear this man.... icon_sad.gif

    edit: alot of people I know have been through this around the 9 month mark... its a natural thing for the relationship to water down at this point in my experience
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:09 AM GMT
    Man that sucks but I kind of feel like this. If someone reveals to you who they really are. Enough said! Cut your loss and charge it to the game!.

    Sorry to hear that man really icon_smile.gif
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:20 AM GMT
    I guess I just want closure, I have not tried to contact him too extensively because I don't want to sound needy but what if it was just all a big misunderstanding...
  • JP85257

    Posts: 3284

    Jul 01, 2011 3:28 AM GMT
    Get revenge. Burn his car.

    Re: Waiting to Exhale
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:36 AM GMT
    JP85257 saidGet revenge. Burn his car.

    Re: Waiting to Exhale


    burn! baby burn!
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:42 AM GMT
    JeremiahSmith said
    JP85257 saidGet revenge. Burn his car.

    Re: Waiting to Exhale


    burn! baby burn!


    ugh, he's in fucking Canada.
  • ccrr85

    Posts: 14

    Jul 01, 2011 3:52 AM GMT
    I once wnet trough somethinh similar, someone I dated just stop answering the phone and erase me from all his account. I know it can be something extemely difficult to overcome, as you dread the lack of closure and of an explanation, something that I found ver useful was writing him a letter saying everything that I had inside me and felt and it was cathartic.
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:56 AM GMT
    Dreamweaver, that's an awful thing to have to go through and I feel for you. You are dealing with a coward, and I hate to say that even if you still like him, he's not worth your time as he has made it very appearant how little he values your emotional well being. Hang in there.
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    Jul 01, 2011 3:57 AM GMT
    Guys suck. Anything that disproves that is just a welcome breath of fresh air. Or a miracle. Depending on you viewpoint.
  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Jul 01, 2011 4:23 AM GMT
    dreamweaver21 saidI guess I just want closure,


    I understand wanting closure....sometimes we have to make our own.

    1443818009_l.jpg
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    Jul 01, 2011 4:27 AM GMT
    I think you know you're right, that he's in Canada and he strikes me a as smooth operator, so he professed his love to someone else. He was wrong to lead you on and wrong to not officially break it off. Bitching at him would feel real good and I'd actually approve of that notion this rarest of instances, but you've been cut off. You'll have to just replace him.

    ................................................................................
    533094-1up_thumb.jpg
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    Jul 01, 2011 4:28 AM GMT
    Thanks for commenting guys, I used to scoff at these type of forms but I appreciate your responses.
  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Jul 01, 2011 4:31 AM GMT
    Trollileo said
    malefeet said
    dreamweaver21 saidI guess I just want closure,


    I understand wanting closure....sometimes we have to make our own.

    1443818009_l.jpg
    I don't think stitching your heart back together would be the safest idea. I don't think it would work after that.

    I think you should take revenge. Troll and grief his ass hard.

    Just kidding (unless that sounds like a good idea to you). You should be the better man and let him go without too much drama. Move on to someone you're attracted to intellectually and physically if not more.



    My, but you are a character....icon_wink.gif
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    Jul 01, 2011 4:37 AM GMT
    Iron_Casanova saidI think you know you're right, that he's in Canada and he strikes me a as smooth operator, so he professed his love to someone else. He was wrong to lead you on and wrong to not officially break it off. Bitching at him would feel real good and I'd actually approve of that notion this rarest of instances, but you've been cut off. You'll have to just replace him.

    ................................................................................
    533094-1up_thumb.jpg


    That was another thing, If anything I was the "smooth operator" the Brian Kinney, he on the other hand only was intimate with less than a dozen guys and pushed to get to know a person first. I never talked about past flings and after meeting him I never looked at anyone else, even porn stopped being appealing to me.

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    Jul 01, 2011 4:54 AM GMT
    Well I think everyone else pretty much said the gist of what I would have said...
    I'm really sorry that happened to you.. I can totally relate, I've had a similar experience as well so I can only imagine what you've been feeling. But yeah, in the end, he's just not worth the stress. And plus, I don't mean to be negative but he was in Canada which I'm guessing is far from where you live so anything can happen... And long distance relationships are hard enough to work out you know...? I don't know him so I can't say nothing bad on his behalf but for you, I know you deserve much better. Stay strong, you'll find a guy who will truly appreciate you.
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    Jul 01, 2011 5:12 AM GMT
    dreamweaver21 said

    That was another thing, If anything I was the "smooth operator" the Brian Kinney, he on the other hand only was intimate with less than a dozen guys and pushed to get to know a person first. I never talked about past flings and after meeting him I never looked at anyone else, even porn stopped being appealing to me.



    Dude, TMI. And why is it every time I respond to a post, suddenly the reply reveals that nothing ever really was wrong. You don't have to guild the lily for me, I'm just as horrified by your love life as anyone else. You don't gots ta be frontin, boo.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 01, 2011 5:16 AM GMT
    Your first hint at any issue with this guy is when he just walked up to you and professed his love for you. No rationally-thinking person would/should do that.
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    Jul 01, 2011 6:06 AM GMT
    what a jackass!

    Forgive Forget and get on with yourlife..burn his pic or stab it with a knife you be able to take out all your frustration n anger like that....believe me it actually works :-)
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    Jul 01, 2011 7:33 AM GMT
    Well your not the only one dude that happend to me, i mean wer stil friends n i wasnt blocked by any means but I was definitely let go....for a while it wont be easy but eventually you'll get over him and find someone better who appreciates ur time for all its worth. Just work out make urself look great take pictures post them online for him to see n drool over haha ive heard of that 1. Its not the end of the world even though it definitely feels like it. Just wait some1 will surprise you....Happend to me and I'm Happy icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 01, 2011 8:18 AM GMT
    I think by now you've unmistakably realized what the end of this story is. By him blocking you on three lines of communication, he showed he didn't want any more communication with you, and they didn't happen by mistake. Maybe if he just blocked your phone number you could call from another number and he might ..........pickup and talk. If he was only going to be gone 2 or 3 months, a long distance relationship, and it would be a long shot could work. You have to know an indefinite long distance relationship would not last. Find a new bf. Try to back away from him. Try not to dwell on this guy. Good Luck
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    Jul 01, 2011 9:18 AM GMT
    I've gone (am going) through something like this. I think its a long process of realizing that closure can only come from within. You have to realize that you are a good person, and don't need this guy to complete you.

    Going after him for answers or to ease your heartache isn't going to work. I think we all like these stories of people breaking up and getting back together, but the reality of the situation is that most couples do not get back together and for good reasons.

  • ataru13

    Posts: 87

    Jul 01, 2011 10:57 AM GMT
    I'm sorry, but it sounds like the typical behaviour of spanish gay guys.
    They like you. Then, for some reason they don't (they never say why).
    So they just cut out all the possible ways of communication between you 2.

    It's awful, but that's how they do it.


    Just move on, don't try to find out what happened, because you'll never know.
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    Jul 01, 2011 11:19 AM GMT
    ataru13 saidI'm sorry, but it sounds like the typical behaviour of spanish gay guys.
    They like you. Then, for some reason they don't (they never say why).
    So they just cut out all the possible ways of communication between you 2.

    It's awful, but that's how they do it.


    Just move on, don't try to find out what happened, because you'll never know.



    As a resident of Miami Beach, I've observed the above statement to be very true. I haven't been able to figure out why it is that way, however.
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    Jul 01, 2011 12:21 PM GMT
    1) Get a rebound hottie
    2) Use your frustration to advantage in your workouts
    3) Tell yourself you can do better.

    If you are able to have someone to find out the "why" from him.