Don't know much about the bi/gay stuff

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    Jul 01, 2011 6:35 AM GMT
    I'm just a 24 year old guy that's trying to get back into shape and when I get back to my old body that I once had I wanna try going to gay bars by myself and see if I find a good looking guy!

    I don't know what I am really.... I don't think I can put label on myself as str8/gay blah blah blah I like to think of it as there are two types of men on earth. One is those who have sex with men and those who just didn't get the chance to. I had sex with several females but the only time I sorta fell in love (now I know it was just lust) was a blonde muscular really handsome coworker a few years ago who loves chicks and I got him to do oral on each other. icon_biggrin.gif We don't contact each other anymore but we sort of ended it as we were just experimenting but we had too many bj sessions for that. He was literally the hottest straight guy at work which had over 500 employees and he's str8 and made him have sex with me so I guess it's not as hard as people make it seem to be to make a 'str8' guy to have sex with you. We even tried anal but couldn't get our dicks in each other's ass because we were both way too tight and no lube or condom at the time.

    I think I'm normal acting, not gangsta or biker butch but not a hopping fairy wearing scarf with pink v neck shirt. But thru the years people seem to think I'm very homophobic which is weird because I don't say homophobic things nor am I overly agressive. I don't think this whole coming out thing is necessary because whether I marry a female or just choose to have sex with men, it's just my sex life style and as long as people around me don't ask why tell them? I mean if you have S&M fetish you're not gonna go around telling your friends and family members about that right?

    I came to this site to know what's it's like to be in the bi/gay community. Because I just want to find a good looking but a nice guy who I can be friends with first and if we find each other sexually attracitve we can go further but I just want to find a male friends who's in the same situation as me. So I don't really know where to start. Guys help me out! Just go to a gay bar and hope to find a good friend? I don't want to ask my str8 friends 'do you know any good gay friend I can be friends with?'. Seriously I don't need the drama. I've had my share of a gay friend drama which I don't wanna talk about here because I'm writing too long already.

    The weird and hypocritical thing is I want to find a 'str8' guy who I can turn into gay or who's mostly str8 that walks into gay places just to experiment. I know this is very selfish but what you can't have seems more tempting. I feel like I know what I want and what I should do but at the same time it's not like I can just find a gay bar and go there by myself easily. Besides if someone I know sees me at a gay bar............... I don't even wanna imagine it.
    Wow.... I'm really lost help me icon_neutral.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 01, 2011 12:14 PM GMT
    When will this notion end? When homophobia ends? When gay men get self-respect? Straight guys don't gave gay sex.
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    Jul 01, 2011 1:06 PM GMT
    gymrat100 said When will this notion end? When homophobia ends? When gay men get self-respect? Straight guys don't gave gay sex.



    +1
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    Jul 01, 2011 1:32 PM GMT
    " I have a complicated order " icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Jul 01, 2011 1:42 PM GMT
    Honestly the whole trying to turn a straight guy gay is rediculious. Either they are gay or straight...they are born that way. No matter how hot you are you will never be able to just make someone chage thier sexual orientation. Also, please don't say 'st8' acting. Someone can either be more masculine or feminine... for the most part it's not up to them just how they were born.

    To give u some advice... find some sports that you are interested in and see if there are any gay/straight leagues that you can join. In Philadelphia there are leagues for every sport. I play both football, tennis, and softball with a ton of great guys that are strght and gay. I suggest you start there because idf anyone asks you can always say you are playing in a league that does not discriminate.
  • rf_dal

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    Jul 01, 2011 1:46 PM GMT
    KaliforniaCool said" I have a complicated order " icon_rolleyes.gif


    +100

    So, you'll only be friends with pretty people? Sounds like you're well on your way to gaydom. Selfish isn't attractive to anyone.
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    Jul 01, 2011 1:53 PM GMT
    The sexual spectrum is a real cunt. Literally. People wax and wane and sexualoty is no different. Some ppl prefer to ne w men or women, both or none at all. Our sexuality is complicated to ppl who have never even been with a man. Whose to say a 60 year old man won't be w a guy jist because he's married?

    Again its complicated and that bitch will never leave us alone until we just bite the bullet and say "i like (insert male/female anatomy here)" and just be ourselves about it.
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    Jul 01, 2011 2:06 PM GMT
    monkeymagic87 said, "I like to think of it as there are two types of men on earth. One is those who have sex with men and those who just didn't get the chance to."

    I think you should start there and get rid of this very wrong idea about all men.


    "I don't think this whole coming out thing is necessary because whether I marry a female or just choose to have sex with men, it's just my sex life style and as long as people around me don't ask why tell them? I mean if you have S&M fetish you're not gonna go around telling your friends and family members about that right?"
    I also think you shouldn't compare love between two men to a fetish, like S & M. It isn't.

    For gay people it is not a sex life style. We had no choice in the matter.

    " We even tried anal but couldn't get our dicks in each other's ass because we were both way too tight and no lube or condom at the time."

    This is extremely dangerous in terms of catching HIV, and I recommend you never do this again.


    " He was literally the hottest straight guy at work which had over 500 employees and he's str8 and made him have sex with me so I guess it's not as hard as people make it seem to be to make a 'str8' guy to have sex with you."
    Another notion you should get rid of is that you made a straight guy have sex with you. If he wanted to have sex with you, he wasn't straight, but one of the zillion shades of Bi, or gay.

    -Doug


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    Jul 01, 2011 2:10 PM GMT
    I don't know what you're trying to say right now but I'll answer what I think you're saying.

    You don't need gay friends to determine if you're gay or bi or what.
    You don't need to put a label on yourself because I just don't think its necessary, if you like sex with guys and girls then you like sex so yeah. I don't put labels on anyway because its not my job. And I don't ask someones sexuality because its not my business. now if you're flirting with me, I'll need to ask so I can get things straight.

    Also straight men fuck anything, well men fuck anything and everything...of course thats not true for everyone. If they are horny enough they might experiment just to get their rocks off, but it will never be a permanent thing. And alcohol levels play a factor as well. I should know...sadly...

    I don't even know what I'm talking about because i don't know what you're talking about. So let me shut up!

    Just live life, stop worrying about things so much. No one needs to know your preference and you can't turn a straight guy gay, you might make him have sex with you, but I doubt he'll be craving man meat.
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    Jul 01, 2011 2:38 PM GMT
    836.gif
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    Jul 01, 2011 6:17 PM GMT
    After reading what I wrote second time around I've noticed I said some things that contradict each other. I just wanna find a good bi or w/e guy who's hot homophobic as a friend first and see what it's like. But that's not easy cuz I don't know who's str8 and who's bi/gay.
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    Jul 01, 2011 6:25 PM GMT
    Forgive me but what's a w/e guy? Why do you want to find a bi guy? Because he's less gay?

    If you want to find a gay friend that might turn into more, join a gay sports club or look for another kind of gay social group.
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    Jul 01, 2011 6:27 PM GMT
    I'm really not sure how it came about but I remember i loved girls when I was young and I was one of the biggest flirt in elementary school and tried lots of hardcore teasing and such. I even remember one time when I was in kindergarten there was a new girl and nobody played with her and I kept following her around and my mom and her mom had to have a chat a few days later but it all changed when I started to look at naked men pics on internet when I was going thru puberty. At first it was just because I was bored and curious what grown men look like and soon I was finding naked men and dicks sexually attractive. So I don't think I was born bi/gay but maybe developed into one. Is that possible? I still love women but to be honest I feel much more sexually attracted to males.

    I even remember my very first orgasm during masturbation and first thought that came into mind during orgasm was this girl in school who I never thought was attractive before so that's weird right there but what's more weird is I don't think I can automatically think of a female during orgasm now even if someone paid me money to do it.
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    Jul 01, 2011 6:29 PM GMT
    mdstudio saidForgive me but what's a w/e guy? Why do you want to find a bi guy? Because he's less gay?

    If you want to find a gay friend that might turn into more, join a gay sports club or look for another kind of gay social group.


    Well gay means just a man who's into other men and not necessarily a girly/femme guy that the media makes it out to be but still when you think of a gay person that feminine image comes to mind. I don't really care if the guy only likes men but I'm not really interested in the typical feminine acting gay men.
  • Neurons

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    Jul 01, 2011 6:58 PM GMT
    You tried anal sex with no lube?

    Lawl
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    Jul 01, 2011 7:12 PM GMT
    Its really scary how much I'm like you in so many ways. I would love to have a close masculine friend who I can confide in, speak with, someone who identifies with me and is cool, good looking, and not a loud flame-ey girl, but a guy's guy - someone who is not just defined by their sexuality but can walk in wherever and not be questioned about their sexuality. Just a regular guy, someone like me I guess...

    I'm sorta bi too - I love women, and enjoy having sex with them too - but I'm really turned on by hot men. I've experimented and dated men too but never been in a relationship with one. And I've had one of those "completely straight guy" experiences too - its fun but I wouldn't really want to have a friend like that - someone who likes to pretend he's into only women and then messes around with men.

    To not just go rattling on - I've declared 'undecided' as my sexuality as of now - and am open to men and women. But I need my hot-an-sex fix every now and then - I'm poly-amorous? can love both men and women?

    Thoughts anyone? monkeymagic?
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    Jul 01, 2011 7:28 PM GMT
    Hornsupcollege saidIts really scary how much I'm like you in so many ways. I would love to have a close masculine friend who I can confide in, speak with, someone who identifies with me and is cool, good looking, and not a loud flame-ey girl, but a guy's guy - someone who is not just defined by their sexuality but can walk in wherever and not be questioned about their sexuality. Just a regular guy, someone like me I guess...

    I'm sorta bi too - I love women, and enjoy having sex with them too - but I'm really turned on by hot men. I've experimented and dated men too but never been in a relationship with one. And I've had one of those "completely straight guy" experiences too - its fun but I wouldn't really want to have a friend like that - someone who likes to pretend he's into only women and then messes around with men.

    To not just go rattling on - I've declared 'undecided' as my sexuality as of now - and am open to men and women. But I need my hot-an-sex fix every now and then - I'm poly-amorous? can love both men and women?

    Thoughts anyone? monkeymagic?


    Yea I'm exactly in the same boat as you. I want to have sex with men but I don't wan to limit myself to being just bi or gay and only hang around with ppl in the gay community. When I say I want a hot dude friend who seems str8 and not homophobic I don't mean I want to be friends first and end up being sould mates. I just want a good looking dude friend I can hang out with and mess around when we feel like.
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    Jul 01, 2011 9:34 PM GMT
    RemyLoV saidThe sexual spectrum is a real cunt. Literally. People wax and wane and sexualoty is no different. Some ppl prefer to ne w men or women, both or none at all. Our sexuality is complicated to ppl who have never even been with a man. Whose to say a 60 year old man won't be w a guy jist because he's married?

    Again its complicated and that bitch will never leave us alone until we just bite the bullet and say "i like (insert male/female anatomy here)" and just be ourselves about it.


    No, it's not. Only gay men struggling with their orientation believe in this BS. Only gay men wrestle with labels. In five, ten years when these guys will fully come out, they'll realize all the years they wasted thinking about such stupid, and homophobic things. Hopefully, they won't be single...but...probably will be. This pattern of "don't label me", "I don't fit in with gay people" has been happening for generations and generations. It ain't new, and it's not going away unfortunately.