Can a gay / bisexual man have a non-sexual man crush?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 02, 2011 5:48 PM GMT
    And I mean an intense one? the kind that makes you think of the guy continuously during the day, every day?
    The kind that makes you happy just by talking to him?

    So, I am kinda confused. I don't know if what I am feeling is attraction toward this guy, or me wanting to be like him (taking him as a big bro figure) or just intense infatuation?

    We're friends but I feel all of the above for him. Though, the main component of my attraction to him isn't sexual. He is extremely hot, don't get me wrong, but it's just that what I feel is more romantic maybe?

    I know these thoughts are a bit disjointed, and I tend to do that when I talk about these subjects, but bear with me. icon_smile.gif

    So, give me your opinion guys. Could this just be a bi man having a man crush on a "bro"? or is this the beginning of something more than that?

    Thanks
    Sam
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Jul 02, 2011 5:51 PM GMT
    just as much as a str8 man can!
  • austex85

    Posts: 572

    Jul 02, 2011 5:55 PM GMT
    i definitely think a "man-crush" in the sense of extreme admiration is possible. there are a ton of brilliant minds out there that i admire and a ton of exceptional bodies (even on this site) that I wish to become, but would never think of having any sort of relations with (notwithstanding the obvious gay/straight factor).

    however, i think what you're describing for this person is probably more along the lines of a romantic crush icon_razz.gif the fact that you're elated in the presence of this guy and do have a sexual attraction to him (even if it's not your primary reason for liking him) makes it unlike a straight "man-crush"
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    Jul 02, 2011 6:24 PM GMT
    I have a huge man-crush on Dmitry Anatol'yevich Medvedev, president of the Russian Federation, but I have absolutely no sexual/romantic attraction toward him.
  • JonPk

    Posts: 132

    Jul 02, 2011 6:39 PM GMT
    samurai111 saidAnd I mean an intense one? the kind that makes you think of the guy continuously during the day, every day?
    The kind that makes you happy just by talking to him?

    So, I am kinda confused. I don't know if what I am feeling is attraction toward this guy, or me wanting to be like him (taking him as a big bro figure) or just intense infatuation?

    We're friends but I feel all of the above for him. Though, the main component of my attraction to him isn't sexual. He is extremely hot, don't get me wrong, but it's just that what I feel is more romantic maybe?

    I know these thoughts are a bit disjointed, and I tend to do that when I talk about these subjects, but bear with me. icon_smile.gif

    So, give me your opinion guys. Could this just be a bi man having a man crush on a "bro"? or is this the beginning of something more than that?

    Thanks
    Sam


    You sound like you're falling in love.
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    Jul 02, 2011 6:43 PM GMT
    Yes, definitely.

    You can have a really good friend and he/she can satisfy many parts of a intimate relationship, sans the sex.

    The difficulty is in acknowledging the non-sexual part and accept that at some point the desires of either person could change.

    I say just go with it and see what happens, but make sure you don't lose your boundaries and sense of self in the process or it could get messy fast.
  • ben27

    Posts: 101

    Jul 02, 2011 10:30 PM GMT
    i have the same feeling with you today, exactly the same and it's not easy to deal with ...
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    Jul 02, 2011 10:50 PM GMT
    I get man crushes on characters on shows that aren't real lol like Eric Delko on CSI Miami and Seeley Booth on Bones
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    Jul 02, 2011 10:50 PM GMT
    You described my EXACT feelings that i had toward my best friend.. i would do anything just to talk to him, i loved everything about him. just being around him made my heart beat like crazy.. but i didnt really think about him sexually, because he was straight and just didnt seem like that kind of guy. now describing him makes my heart beat like crazy..
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    Jul 02, 2011 10:55 PM GMT
    samurai111 saidAnd I mean an intense one? the kind that makes you think of the guy continuously during the day, every day?
    The kind that makes you happy just by talking to him?

    So, I am kinda confused. I don't know if what I am feeling is attraction toward this guy, or me wanting to be like him (taking him as a big bro figure) or just intense infatuation?

    We're friends but I feel all of the above for him. Though, the main component of my attraction to him isn't sexual. He is extremely hot, don't get me wrong, but it's just that what I feel is more romantic maybe?

    I know these thoughts are a bit disjointed, and I tend to do that when I talk about these subjects, but bear with me. icon_smile.gif

    So, give me your opinion guys. Could this just be a bi man having a man crush on a "bro"? or is this the beginning of something more than that?

    Thanks
    Sam


    This is a sort of bromance, surely? Of course it can be non-sexual.
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    Jul 02, 2011 11:10 PM GMT
    I felt the same about my besfriend in college. I never had sexual feelings toward him but looked forward to hanging out and working out every other day. He is straight and knows about me and has said that it never bothered him. So yeah I think man-crushes can happen without any sexual feelings in the mix.
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    Jul 03, 2011 1:44 PM GMT
    I could be falling in love and it could be a bromance like many of the previous posters said.

    The one thing I think about when he comes to mind, though, is that, I want him to be happy. Sometimes I find it a bit naive, but in reality, I just want him to be happy, whether he's with me or with anyone else.

    I just can't stand the idea of him being unhappy, so I guess that can sum up my feelings...
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    Jul 03, 2011 2:00 PM GMT
    samurai111 saidI could be falling in love and it could be a bromance like many of the previous posters said.

    The one thing I think about when he comes to mind, though, is that, I want him to be happy. Sometimes I find it a bit naive, but in reality, I just want him to be happy, whether he's with me or with anyone else.

    I just can't stand the idea of him being unhappy, so I guess that can sum up my feelings...


    Sounds like your love for him is true to me. The mindset you have with it is most admirable. icon_smile.gif
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    Jul 03, 2011 2:02 PM GMT
    Chattman91 saidI have a huge man-crush on Dmitry Anatolyevich Medvedev, president of the Russian Federation, but I have absolutely no sexual/romantic attraction toward him.
    That's the way I feel about many of the hot guys on RJ.
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    Jul 04, 2011 6:26 AM GMT
    Animus said
    samurai111 saidI could be falling in love and it could be a bromance like many of the previous posters said.

    The one thing I think about when he comes to mind, though, is that, I want him to be happy. Sometimes I find it a bit naive, but in reality, I just want him to be happy, whether he's with me or with anyone else.

    I just can't stand the idea of him being unhappy, so I guess that can sum up my feelings...


    Sounds like your love for him is true to me. The mindset you have with it is most admirable. ejfllywj.php?xZA9NfNBVdeUY2Gbk6ow=b9cnJr


    Thank you icon_smile.gif
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    Jul 04, 2011 6:56 AM GMT
    I don't think so, can a straight man have a crush on a girl without wanting to bone her, the answer is NO! If I have a crush on a guy, I wanna fuck them (technically, the other way around but you catch my drifticon_biggrin.gif)
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    Jul 04, 2011 7:02 AM GMT
    Oh good lord yes. I've had a thing for two guys so far- one was just like "omghetalkedtome" but I never felt right thinking about him in my bed. The other guy is the classic "be mine and be in my bed..."