I think I'm attracting alcoholics to me constantly

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 03, 2011 10:57 PM GMT
    How can I stop attracting guys who are either just over break upss, abuse alcohol etc or get defensive when I mention it to them?

    I am wondering why I attract them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 1:55 AM GMT
    Everyone has some sort of baggage. We've all lived life and had experiences. You'll just have to be patient until you meet the right guy for you.
  • ohioguy12

    Posts: 2024

    Jul 04, 2011 4:34 AM GMT
    Maybe it's you who cause them to drink.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 5:43 AM GMT
    we attract our own kind
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 6:10 AM GMT
    The question is why you are attracted to those types. They rarely have the strength to pursue those that don't willingly open their lives to them. There is a spark, a vulnerabilty, a danger that you find enticing or comforting or exciting and are continualy allowing them entry into your life. The types you describe can barely walk on their own - you would have to hold the door wide open for them to get into your life.

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    Jul 04, 2011 6:18 AM GMT
    blactor saidHow can I stop attracting guys who are either just over break upss, abuse alcohol etc or get defensive when I mention it to them?

    I am wondering why I attract them.

    You may appear to them to be a sympathetic and vulnerable person. This is who they target, because no one else will have them. And they rely upon dependency, guys who will support them emotionally.

    You may need to get a little more selective and tough, at least in the initial phases of meeting guys. You want an equal, not a taker.

    How to put on a "tough" facade" without scaring off the good gays is a balancing act, and I don't know your local culture & customs. But I suspect your current presentation is that of an "easy mark" that's attracting the wrong guys.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 6:21 AM GMT
    ohioguy12 saidMaybe it's you who cause them to drink.


    In British terms- you're acting like a knob. In US terms- a prick.

    Get a life, little one.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 6:23 AM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    blactor saidHow can I stop attracting guys who are either just over break upss, abuse alcohol etc or get defensive when I mention it to them?

    I am wondering why I attract them.

    You may appear to them to be a sympathetic and vulnerable person. This is who they target, because no one else will have them. And they rely upon dependency, guys who will support them emotionally.

    You may need to get a little more selective and tough, at least in the initial phases of meeting guys. You want an equal, not a taker.

    How to put on a "tough" facade" without scaring off the good gays is a balancing act, and I don't know your local culture & customs. But I suspect your current presentation is that of an "easy mark" that's attracting the wrong guys.


    That's spot on! Thanks. That makes perfect sense. icon_smile.gificon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 6:24 AM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    blactor saidHow can I stop attracting guys who are either just over break upss, abuse alcohol etc or get defensive when I mention it to them?

    I am wondering why I attract them.

    You may appear to them to be a sympathetic and vulnerable person. This is who they target, because no one else will have them. And they rely upon dependency, guys who will support them emotionally.

    You may need to get a little more selective and tough, at least in the initial phases of meeting guys. You want an equal, not a taker.

    How to put on a "tough" facade" without scaring off the good gays is a balancing act, and I don't know your local culture & customs. But I suspect your current presentation is that of an "easy mark" that's attracting the wrong guys.



    Art_Deco, in honor of the gracefully helpful and relevant nature of this post I present to you.....the informative post of the day award

    first_place_ribbon.jpg
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Jul 04, 2011 6:26 AM GMT
    blactor saidHow can I stop attracting guys who are either just over break upss, abuse alcohol etc or get defensive when I mention it to them?

    I am wondering why I attract them.



    Try not hanging out so much at the local watering hole during "Happy Hour" icon_eek.gif
  • Montague

    Posts: 5205

    Jul 04, 2011 8:42 AM GMT
    I'm an alcoholic and I have to say that I do find you attractive with my penis in mind.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 10:06 AM GMT
    Sounds like he needs a date, real soon. I guess it's one way to self promote yourself. Always remember that you don't have to be happy to be gay.

    Thought I would lay that one on you, so to speak.


    I should also say I have the same problem, I am a muscle magnet.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 10:18 AM GMT
    now that I have taken a peek at your pictures, looks like you have been around the block several dozen times, I think it is one of those been there done that. might want to get a t-shirt with a big S printed on it, that might work..


    It's been a slice.
  • ohioguy12

    Posts: 2024

    Jul 04, 2011 1:52 PM GMT
    blactor said
    ohioguy12 saidMaybe it's you who cause them to drink.


    In British terms- you're acting like a knob. In US terms- a prick.

    Get a life, little one.


    Lighten up icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 04, 2011 9:49 PM GMT
    My word- you ask a genuine question and the crap that emerges is ridiculous.