Hook-up then a Date?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2011 3:23 PM GMT
    Hey guys, have any of you had the experience of a hook-up with a guy and finding you would like to go on a date instead? I know it's backwards, but I met a cool guy this past weekend, chatted for a bit, found we had stuff in common, and then had good sex.

    The next day I felt like, damn, I wish I had met that guy out, went on few dates and then had sex. I want to ask him out, but it was clearly neither of our intentions when we met. I know he's single. Would you just go for it or chaulk it up to as fun hook-up that may or may not happen again? Have you ever converted a hook-up to a date?
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    Jul 05, 2011 3:31 PM GMT
    you'll only know for sure if you try.....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2011 3:32 PM GMT
    If you liked the guy, go after him! I know lots of guys who hooked up and then went on to date the guy. My best friend is in a 10 year relationship after what started as nothing more then a hook-up.
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    Jul 05, 2011 3:36 PM GMT
    JeremiahSmith saidIf you liked the guy, go after him! I know lots of guys who hooked up and then went on to date the guy. My best friend is in a 10 year relationship after what started as nothing more then a hook-up.


    This. I know a couple who have been together for 10 years, and they met in an orgy at sf pride.
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    Jul 05, 2011 3:39 PM GMT
    Yeah it happened to me before and it was rather confusing.

    It went like this - met for a hook-up, had sex, cuddled and chatted for a while, had a blowjob, then he went out to meet a friend for a couple of hours, then we met up again, had sex, then went out for dinner.

    Everything went really well and I would have seen him again but he went a bit cold after that and it never happened - can only assume he liked the sex but not the date (despite what he said afterwards - he called me about half an hour after to say he'd had a great time) and thought I was more interested in dating than hooking up (I'd have been FINE with keeping it casual). So that was all a bit weird.

    Then another guy, I met up with a group of guys from a gay networking website to go clubbing, we hit it off and ended up going back to his place and having sex all night, afterwards he said he wanted to take me out so we went on a few dates and had some more sex, but it fizzled out after a few weeks and we decided we'd be better off as mates (but have since lost touch).

    So I think it definitely happens but in my experience hasn't formed anything lasting. But hey, if I liked someone enough to fuck them then I was defnitely up for dating and seeing if there was anything more, and if not, well sex was good too. I also had several date-n-hookup combos where it was a hookup but we then grabbed a bite to eat or chatted for a bit too - which I actually preferred to a quick hump and dump.
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    Jul 05, 2011 3:44 PM GMT
    Chainers said
    JeremiahSmith saidIf you liked the guy, go after him! I know lots of guys who hooked up and then went on to date the guy. My best friend is in a 10 year relationship after what started as nothing more then a hook-up.


    This. I know a couple who have been together for 10 years, and they met in an orgy at sf pride.


    "Just think honey, 10 years ago you were being double-penetrated by two muscle daddies while I was elbow-deep in a bay-area bear when our eyes met and I fell in love!"
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    Jul 05, 2011 3:45 PM GMT
    Pure said
    Chainers said
    JeremiahSmith saidIf you liked the guy, go after him! I know lots of guys who hooked up and then went on to date the guy. My best friend is in a 10 year relationship after what started as nothing more then a hook-up.


    This. I know a couple who have been together for 10 years, and they met in an orgy at sf pride.


    "Just think honey, 10 years ago you were being double-penetrated by two muscle daddies while I was elbow-deep in a bay-area bear when our eyes met and I fell in love!"


    lawl icon_lol.gif
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    Jul 05, 2011 4:29 PM GMT
    Yep... the hook up lasted for 9 years. Bought property together, the whole lot.

    Ended a year ago.
    It can work.
  • wild_sky360

    Posts: 1492

    Jul 05, 2011 6:09 PM GMT
    Why not?
    A blowjob is just another way to say, nice meeting you.icon_wink.gif
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    Jul 05, 2011 6:17 PM GMT
    I have no idea how you guys track your apparently very specific narrow definition of a " date". I think if I met up I would have to ask you if we were on a date or not. I think it's funny that fucking and dinner is not a date. Dates must be very boring then ...no wonder why no one wants to date.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2011 6:22 PM GMT
    He's had the milk for free so why would he want to buy the cow?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2011 6:23 PM GMT
    Atleast now you know you're sexually compatible icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 05, 2011 6:24 PM GMT
    redheadguy saidHe's had the milk for free so why would he want to buy the cow?


    Because this isnt the idea that only men want sex while other men dont want sex and want a relationship.

    If your holding on to sex in order to "trick" a man into a relationship in the first place, it is doomed to fail.

    The whole "got the milk for free" crap is extremely sexist (essentailly saying men ONLY go into relationships for sex) and extremely fucking retarded.

    Thank you for lowering the IQ of everyone in this thread.
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    Jul 05, 2011 6:30 PM GMT
    Alpha13 saidI have no idea how you guys track your apparently very specific narrow definition of a " date". I think if I met up I would have to ask you if we were on a date or not. I think it's funny that fucking and dinner is not a date. Dates must be very boring then ...no wonder why no one wants to date.


    Well I think the word "date" should be used--especially for a FIRST date--to mean a mtg used to get to know each other in the hopes a second date will follow, rather than use the word as a euphemism for a meeting that includes sex.

    As for hooking up and THEN dating, it's never worked for me. I was in a similar situation, but the other guy didn't have any interest for me in the long run. I suppose it could happen, but it usually doesn't work that way. I think the line, "LTR oriented but not opposed to having fun until I meet The One" is the most wonderful way you could say, "I just dream about being monogomous! I know it's not going to happen so I think I'll just have casual sex for the rest of my life...or at least until I'm completely unattractive."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 05, 2011 7:06 PM GMT
    Yes, I had a hook-up that went on to become a date. After a couple of months, we decided that we should just be friends. Funny thing is that we still continue to do "date" stuff like dinners and movies, but as friends (platonic).
  • Greygull

    Posts: 282

    Jul 05, 2011 7:18 PM GMT
    my boyfriend and I started out with a hook up, then a FWB relationship then decided to be serious, we've been together for two years
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    Jul 05, 2011 7:30 PM GMT
    Greygull saidmy boyfriend and I started out with a hook up, then a FWB relationship then decided to be serious, we've been together for two years



    The same thing has happened to me.

    Yes, I have hooked up with a couple of guys just for sex and ended up dating them. Not too unusual at all.

    Ask him out!! Otherwise, you'll never know.
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    Jul 05, 2011 8:32 PM GMT
    Thanks for all of your input, guys! I'll give him a call tonight. We'll see.
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    Jul 05, 2011 8:48 PM GMT
    True story. Met my partner as a hook up. 3 1/2 years later, we're goin' strong.
  • swimjohn

    Posts: 252

    Jul 05, 2011 8:59 PM GMT
    Yup. I ran into an old hookup (from a few months ago) last week and we talked a bit and decided to go on a proper date the next day. So a bit different from your situation but it was really fun and kinda took the awkwardness out of everything. Good luck!
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    Jul 06, 2011 2:54 AM GMT
    I called him tonight and left a voicemail. He had used a fake name. Lol. Not sure what to think of him now. Seem silly to do that when you're totally out. Oh well.
  • confidentcrip

    Posts: 111

    Jul 06, 2011 3:09 AM GMT
    wild_sky360 saidWhy not?
    A blowjob is just another way to say, nice meeting you.icon_wink.gif



    lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 06, 2011 3:11 AM GMT
    brueges saidI called him tonight and left a voicemail. He had used a fake name. Lol. Not sure what to think of him now. Seem silly to do that when you're totally out. Oh well.

    Yea fuck him. Using a fake name is hella weird man. You can do better.
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    Jul 06, 2011 3:15 AM GMT
    Xian_Buffed saidTrue story. Met my partner as a hook up. 3 1/2 years later, we're goin' strong.


    Same here man. Anything is possible if you remain open minded....
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    Jul 06, 2011 5:50 PM GMT
    Fuck first, then date later if there's great chemistry. This approach has its own downside because many gay boys tend to develop emotional attachment after a great fuck and many mistake a great fuck for love or a deeper connection. Works for me though.