If I'm not sure he's gay, should I give him my phone number?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 11, 2011 5:01 AM GMT
    I'm newly-out and still trying to get the hang of dating. Today I had a very pleasant conversation with a sales clerk at an electronics store. I got the general vibe that he was gay, but I'm not very confident. He asked me twice about my cell phone (I came in to buy an adapter for an electric piano, so I found these questions a bit odd), and I think he was possibly trying to lead into a phone number exchange. Disappointingly, I let the opportunity slip by. I'm considering going back to the store tomorrow. If I'm not sure he's gay, should I give him my phone number? Couldn't this go terribly, terribly wrong?
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    Jul 11, 2011 10:51 AM GMT
    Go ahead. What's the worst that could happen? He gives it back? At least you're free from the wondering ;-) All the best!
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    Jul 11, 2011 10:55 AM GMT
    If he asked you twice about your number, give it to him, you should also wear like something with the rainbow, like a bracelet or something tomorrow when you go back and see how he reacts, if he's gay, it's a win win situation, if he's not, he can't say anything about the bracelet cuz you're the costumer.
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    Jul 11, 2011 11:49 AM GMT
    what is really the worst that could happen if you just gave it to him. I have given guys phone numbers a few times who said "Uhhh, I'm not gay".. And I was like..

    "Really? icon_confused.gif "

  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Jul 11, 2011 12:16 PM GMT
    Lol No offense buddy but I think he was just being friendly. That is part of his job. However, if he did ask for you number give it to him. If he is interested in more than trying to help you than you will find out.
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    Jul 11, 2011 1:19 PM GMT
    "When in doubt just give it out" ...your number that is.

    A workplace scenario can be tricky (no pun intended).

    If you feel signals stronger than just being friendly/helpful take note if you start getting asked about your personal interests (things beyond the scope of the worker's normal job duties).

    If so, consider having some inexpensive business cards drawn up with simply your name, email, and phone number. That way you can hand it them with ease and no fanfare other than to simply say "...here's my info, if wanna hang out sometime let me know".

    Mild discretion and respect for the unknown is key.

    Good luck on the adventures ahead!
  • Muscmasmat

    Posts: 124

    Jul 11, 2011 2:53 PM GMT
    He is a CLERK in an electonics store. He asked to see your cell phone because he wants to SELL you a new one. Unless he specifically offers his phone number, then that is all it was about. But don't be discouraged. Keep on looking for those gaydar signs. Good luck!
  • LJay

    Posts: 11612

    Jul 11, 2011 3:04 PM GMT
    Muscmasmat has a good point there.

    Another way to look at it is to ask yourself if you are after sex and/or friendship. Give him your number and treat him as a friend until you get to know him a little better and then go with the sex part if it feels right.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 12, 2011 2:37 PM GMT
    Or he is a sneaky little devil, and asked to see your phone so he can go to the About Phone and get your # himself!

    So... you could start a new contact... enter his name (from his name badge), and say. you can see it if you complete the quiz that is on the screen! icon_smile.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 12, 2011 3:53 PM GMT
    SaguaroIII saidCouldn't this go terribly, terribly wrong?
    Yes. And you could get laid.

    If you don't take your chances, you'll never know the outcome. icon_wink.gif
  • wild_sky360

    Posts: 1492

    Jul 12, 2011 3:55 PM GMT
    The moment has past, but I bet he'd remember you if you called him at work. If you did misinterpret the signals, there would be zero embarrassment for either of you over the phone.
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    Jul 12, 2011 4:26 PM GMT
    Becareful man. If he's not he may punch your lights out and if he is, well let the good times roll.
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    Jul 14, 2011 4:39 AM GMT
    Thanks, everybody, for all your conflicting advice/interpretations :-)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 14, 2011 1:30 PM GMT
    He works in retail. Statistically there are more gays in that strata than the high barrier to entry buttoned-down white collar world. Go for it and see what happens.

    Editor's note: this line of reasoning is also why I am not welcome in several GameStop locations.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 14, 2011 2:00 PM GMT
    When did we stop giving numbers out to people we think might not be gay?

    Find a common interest, leave a number if he wants to talk about that interest further, and move on. If he calls, about the common interest (or something more), great. If not, there's other fish in the sea.