why is it so hard to find love that lasts longer than a yr?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 24, 2011 4:21 PM GMT
    im tired of the immature retards who date for 5 6 months just to have sex with me..im tired of making love..i wanna make love last..any thoughts guys?
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    Jul 24, 2011 4:54 PM GMT
    If you made things last as long as five months you are doing much better than the general population icon_neutral.gif

    Maybe not in the first conversation you ever have with the guy, but at some point early on, do you set expectations and inform him of what you are ultimately looking for? You don't want to give all the information away up front since that scares people off, but you also don't want him to think you are just casually going to hang out then go separate ways a little later.

    You also are on the younger end of the spectrum, yet want something very mature and adult. A lot of people around my age (and older than me) refuse to date anyone under 25 years old since they think there is no maturity and long term potential there at such a young age.

    My best advice is just be yourself and keep looking until you find what you are looking for. You are young, you are in school, you are in good shape - you are doing EVERYTHING right to be a desirable partner - just don't feel rushed to get married to the perfect guy next week. You have plenty of time.
  • Rawrdo

    Posts: 343

    Jul 24, 2011 7:15 PM GMT
    buckeyefan1009 saidi wanna make love last..


    So I don't know if you meant it or not, but that's my favorite line fromthe Jason Aldean & Kelly Clarkson Don't You Wanna Stay song. Anyways, I think spaghettimonster nailed it.The thing about dating is that it isn't fair or logical. Personally I've been at the end of many failed relationships that started because they thought I was great boyfriend material, but in the end they weren't that into me, which was okay for them, but sucked for me. Just hang in there, eventually you'll find the right guy who can appreciate all that you bring to the table AND is into you just as much as you are into him.
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    Jul 24, 2011 8:44 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]Rawrdo said[/cite]
    buckeyefan1009 saidi wanna make love last..


    So I don't know if you meant it or not, but that's my favorite line fromthe Jason Aldean & Kelly Clarkson Don't You Wanna Stay song. Anyways, I think spaghettimonster nailed it.

    thats exactly where i got it from and i love that song too!!!
  • jlly_rnchr

    Posts: 1759

    Jul 24, 2011 8:47 PM GMT
    You're awfully young. Give it time, maybe you'll be able to make love last longer in a couple years.
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    Jul 24, 2011 9:00 PM GMT
    i find it refreshing. in most straight relationships, the ones that never worked still last forever bc there is so much miscommunication.

    a lot of relationships i have had with guys, i can tell way earlier in a relationship if it wont work out. you just have to wait for the one thats right for you...
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    Jul 24, 2011 9:03 PM GMT
    Sounds like you've been listening to Jason Aldean and Kelly Clarkson :-)

    Read the section on 'Love' in 'the road less traveled' and you will have the answer to your question..
  • errol88

    Posts: 365

    Jul 24, 2011 9:03 PM GMT
    Cue sarcastic slutty response by paulflexes in 3. . .2. . .
  • davemancheste...

    Posts: 175

    Jul 24, 2011 9:03 PM GMT
    What is love...?
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    Jul 24, 2011 9:07 PM GMT
    davemanchester saidWhat is love...?



    is a many splendored thing....
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    Jul 24, 2011 9:07 PM GMT
    davemanchester saidWhat is love...?


    Baby don't hurt me,

    don't hurt me,

    no more..

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    Jul 24, 2011 9:19 PM GMT
    Make sure that the two of you are looking for the same thing (LTR or just fun).

    Find the right guy. Always work (hard when needed) on your relationship. If either of the two guys aren't serious about it, it just wasn't meant to be. Be accepting of that and don't dwell on it. A lesson (or more) was hopefully learned. Move on.
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    Jul 24, 2011 9:22 PM GMT
    BuddyinNYC saidMake sure that the two of you are looking for the same thing (LTR or just fun).

    Love isn't so much how you look into each others' eyes, but how you look out - together - on the rest of the world.
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    Jul 24, 2011 9:30 PM GMT
    BuddyinNYC saidMake sure that the two of you are looking for the same thing (LTR or just fun).

    Find the right guy. Always work (hard when needed) on your relationship. If either of the two guys aren't serious about it, it just wasn't meant to be. Be accepting of that and don't dwell on it. A lesson (or more) was hopefully learned. Move on.


    There is no 'right' one... There may be an acceptable one.
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    Jul 24, 2011 9:30 PM GMT
    I had a one night thing once, and I most likely wouldn't repeat the experience. I brag that it happened though because you can't change history and because of his occupation. But yeah- these immature guys are everywhere. I also use grindr, since there's nobody in the suburbs, so I get guys old enough to be my dad sending me pictures of their downstairs. I just say "Oh how saucy..." then ignore them.
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    Jul 25, 2011 2:53 AM GMT
    jlly_rnchr saidYou're awfully young. Give it time, maybe you'll be able to make love last longer in a couple years.


    is it against the rules to be able to have love now?? why do i have to wait
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    Jul 25, 2011 5:09 AM GMT
    Good things come to those who wait. (:

    You don't have to wait, you just have to find the right person.
    That's tricky at any age, but can be a higher hurdle at a younger age.
    First you may not yet know yourself - or he himself. Even what you want.
    One - or both - of you may be relocating.

    Then there's always the question of where to meet people.
    Try places where you'll find like-minded people.
    Sports team, book club, theater group, volunteer organization, etc.

    I think it's great that you want a LTR, but keep in mind that you can't just walk up to the plate and hit a grand-slam on your first swing. There'll be some strike outs, some hits with you being stranded on base at the end of the inning. It's the nature of the "game". All you can do is to prepare yourself and put yourself in a position to hit it out of the park when the right pitch comes.
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    Jul 25, 2011 5:12 AM GMT
    _SAGE_ said
    davemanchester saidWhat is love...?


    Baby don't hurt me,

    don't hurt me,

    no more..



    LMAO!!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 25, 2011 5:12 AM GMT
    davemanchester saidWhat is love...?


    got to do.... got to do with iiiit...

    (the one I wanted was taken by Sage lol)