Revamped Nursery Rhymes

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2011 12:14 PM GMT
    A few days back I read a funny revamped nursery rhyme

    'Mary had a little gram, her coke was white as snow. Everywhere that Mary went, she did lines of blow.' -Jizismyname


    I loved it so much that I made two version of my own.

    Jack Sprat loved smacked
    His wife shoots up Heroin
    And so between the two you see
    Doped till they bled clean


    and

    Hoe Madame Hubbard
    Went to her cupboard
    To give her trick some crack
    When she came there,
    The cupboard was bare,
    And so the trick cooked her 'goose'


    Now it does sound a little disjointed but if anyone can do better with their own version or better rhymes I would love to hear it!


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    Jul 28, 2011 3:03 PM GMT
    I'm usually good at this sort of thing, but not today:

    See the way his pants tent
    will poke you in the eye
    Nine and a half inches
    caked ‘gainst his thigh
    When the zipper’s opened
    your heart begins to sing
    Till you re-a-lize what you’re
    ta-king on with that thing!
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    Jul 28, 2011 3:06 PM GMT
    eagermuscle saidI'm usually good at this sort of thing, but not today:

    See the way his pants tent
    will poke you in the eye
    Nine and a half inches
    caked ‘gainst his thigh
    When the zipper’s opened
    your heart begins to sing
    Till you re-a-lize what you’re
    ta-king on with that thing!


    Hehehehe cute....And ahem..... lol
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    Jul 28, 2011 3:10 PM GMT


    On a similar note, the BBC censored the nursery rhyme Humpty Dumpty,

    They omitted the line "all the kings men...couldn't put humpty together again" as it was too graphic.
  • charmr

    Posts: 233

    Jul 28, 2011 8:31 PM GMT
    Fivealive saidA few days back I read a funny revamped nursery rhyme

    'Mary had a little gram, her coke was white as snow. Everywhere that Mary went, she did lines of blow.' -Jizismyname


    I loved it so much that I made two version of my own.

    Jack Sprat loved smacked
    His wife shoots up Heroin
    And so between the two you see
    Doped till they bled clean


    and

    Hoe Madame Hubbard
    Went to her cupboard
    To give her trick some crack
    When she came there,
    The cupboard was bare,
    And so the trick cooked her 'goose'


    Now it does sound a little disjointed but if anyone can do better with their own version or better rhymes I would love to hear it!




    How about this one!

    Mary had a little sheep
    And with this sheep she went to sleep
    The sheep it turned out was a ram
    And Mary had a little lamb!
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    Jul 28, 2011 8:34 PM GMT
    Hahahah good one! icon_biggrin.gif Baaaaa