I am with my first and want to be with him forever...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2011 4:30 PM GMT
    What do you guys think? Is it possible? Anybody still with their first?
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    Jul 28, 2011 4:37 PM GMT
    I thought the same thing at 23.
    By 24 I was over it. icon_lol.gif
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    Jul 28, 2011 5:43 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidI thought the same thing at 23.
    By 24 I was over it. icon_lol.gif


    Amazingly, me too. except it was 22, over one year later.

    Give it a shot man, but many people discover they don't really know what they want at such a young age... good luck
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    Jul 28, 2011 5:46 PM GMT
    Bad
    Bad
    Bad
    Bad
    Bad
    Bad
    Bad idea.
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    Jul 28, 2011 5:47 PM GMT
    i was with my first for 6 years... ummm, i was an ass and too young to realize i he wasnt it. hopefully it works out for you
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    Jul 28, 2011 5:48 PM GMT
    Live in the moment and enjoy it for what it is. It may or may not last, but why not enjoy it while you have it.

    Futurethought is better left for times of what will be vs what if.
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    Jul 28, 2011 5:49 PM GMT
    I was with my first at 20 and it was also over by 21.

    That's not to say, however, that it isn't impossible. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be with one person for the rest of your life; it may or may not work out. By all means think about the future, but be careful not to put pressure into the relationship because you want it to go on for ever. Take each day as it comes :-) Good luck!
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    Jul 28, 2011 5:53 PM GMT
    DAN_THE_MAN saidWhat do you guys think? Is it possible? Anybody still with their first?


    Congratulations on finding someone that makes you feel that good!!!

    Don't worry about "forever" just enjoy what you have today and try not to take it for granted. If the two of you are able to continually grow together and support one another while still holding similar goals in mind (all while nevr losing sight of your individuality) then yes, there is no reason that the two of you should not endure. And don't worry what anyone else has to say about it either - including me.

    You will find there is nothing truly predictable (at least nothing that really matters) and attachments to outcomes only get in the way of enjoying the process. The only clear-cut path is a death sentence. Enjoy each day as it comes, try to learn something new and remain open to the possibilities of the next day. After a while, it is those days that add up to "Forever."

    Good luck!!!
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    Jul 28, 2011 6:09 PM GMT
    Wow... Thanks guys.... These are so great! Thanks for the responses icon_smile.gif as I say "que sera sera whatever will be will be"
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    Jul 28, 2011 6:20 PM GMT
    paulflexes saidI thought the same thing at 23.
    By 24 I was over it. icon_lol.gif


    qft
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    Jul 28, 2011 6:28 PM GMT
    DAN_THE_MAN saidWhat do you guys think? Is it possible? Anybody still with their first?

    No, my first partner tragically died (literally in my arms of AIDS). But every day we were together was a joy, my standard call when I entered the front door being "Hello, my love!"

    Now I have a new partner, a new love. And I fall asleep next to him each night, usually touching him, as I did last night. We do everything together, rarely doing anything apart (I think it's years since I had a restaurant dinner by myself).

    I know guys who got together at your age, and are still together over 40 years later. One of them an RJ member right here. Perhaps he'll see this thread and speak up.

    So is it possible? Sure it is. Whether it will be so in your case, well, that I wouldn't know. But possible? Of course! I see it every day with our friends. Guys together 20, 30 and 40 years, from their 20s as you are.

    I'm very pleased for your happiness. Work on it, the two of you, and it will indeed "be forever." icon_biggrin.gif
  • Crucializer

    Posts: 389

    Jul 28, 2011 6:39 PM GMT
    This encouraged me as well. icon_biggrin.gif
  • umphreak

    Posts: 43

    Jul 28, 2011 6:44 PM GMT
    I'm still with my first. It's been 6+ years and we're basically partnered. Sometimes you just get lucky.
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    Jul 28, 2011 7:21 PM GMT
    Live for now it's all you really have. The future never happens .. Yet we use it as a fiction to create anxiety and fear in the present moment.
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    Jul 28, 2011 7:29 PM GMT
    Forever? I've never been with anyone but I'm smart enough to know that one should never plan for such things. Hoping might be fine if your expectations are not misplaced high up in sky.
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    Jul 28, 2011 7:53 PM GMT
    Its possible. But its never been for me.

    Yea I'm the Negative Betty here. icon_lol.gif
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Jul 28, 2011 8:08 PM GMT
    Whether it's your first or seventieth, it's unhealthy to make the claim I want to be with him forever. A healthy relationship involves being aware of your place in a relationship, which includes knowing when it is not working. The best thing you can do for a relationship is leave it when the call's appropriate. So despite knowing you're coming from a good place, your desire actually seems really green, and most certainly not in any place to be with anyone (first or not) long term. The healthier thing to do is enjoy your relationship and be open to changes. The reality is that it's very difficult to know what you want in a relationship and in life from only one experience, especially at your age.
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    Jul 28, 2011 8:15 PM GMT
    I was 21 when i had my first boyfriend...he was the sweetest guy on earth, I wanned to be with him forever thats for sure....he also said he wanned to be with me forever....he dumped my ass after a month....dont rush things, live the moment, learn from experience and more importantly dont get jaded. Love feels different as you get older.
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    Jul 28, 2011 8:58 PM GMT
    i was with my first boyfriend for three years at age 18 ad it just ended last october. why was i so stupid?!?! haha before that i was also in a relationship with my gf for 3 years and i thought both times that it was it. so maybe putting the label "in it for the long hall" is a curse icon_sad.gif
  • athan23

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    Jul 28, 2011 9:01 PM GMT
    yup... all you need is trust and love
  • athan23

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    Jul 28, 2011 9:04 PM GMT
    GVJoe90 saidi was with my first boyfriend for three years at age 18 ad it just ended last october. why was i so stupid?!?! haha before that i was also in a relationship with my gf for 3 years and i thought both times that it was it. so maybe putting the label "in it for the long hall" is a curse icon_sad.gif





    i think no. 3 was a bad no. for you.. lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 28, 2011 9:08 PM GMT
    A lot of people may think you are too young or that your first relationship wont work out. For a lot of people, that may be the case, but you never know what the future holds for you and your bf.
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    Jul 28, 2011 9:08 PM GMT
    yea thats what im starting to fear icon_sad.gif
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    Jul 28, 2011 9:16 PM GMT
    How will you know you exactly what you want if you haven't dated around? I dont mean that you should become a slut, but see what all is out there?
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    Jul 28, 2011 9:19 PM GMT
    that ship sailed a while ago....