Hard to read--help me decode!


  • Jul 29, 2011 5:01 AM GMT
    Hey everyone, so I've been seeing this guy for awhile now and I'm not sure where we are. I know we're at least good friends, but I think I want more. He's a great guy for me: athletic, nerdy, minorly OCD, etc. We have similar family backgrounds as well.

    So we met on an online website and we haven't hooked up yet, which I think is a milestone for me, but I'm just not sure why that is. Could he be a virgin? The subject hasn't come up at all when we hang out--could it be that he still has the vcard?

    Also, he's very willing to hang out with me a lot, does that mean that he doesn't have other friends, is he just using me for companionship? I mean there's nothing too wrong with that, but it's just another question I have.

    He's done nothing too forward in terms of indicating anything further than friends, although he does like to take his shirt off and he's commented about my build before (big legs,calves, etc.).

    I really do like the friendship we have and I'd like to keep that going, but at the same time I'd be interested in kicking it up a notch. Survey says no go--is that what this sounds like?
  • massbuildah

    Posts: 276

    Jul 29, 2011 12:27 PM GMT
    Just a thought here but you could do something crazy like...gee i don't know....telling him you think he's hot!

    just text him or something and tell him your psyched that you became friends, love hanging out, yadda yadda, and that you think he's cool and pretty hot and if he's interested in taking it to the physical level that would be great, if not that's cool too....

    you'll never know unless you ask him bro!
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    Jul 29, 2011 12:57 PM GMT
    if you're uncertain, watch for the cues... if he's commenting on your physical appearance then it sounds pretty good to me...

    if you hang out, why not just ask him if he's had a BF before? if he says he's had 30 of them then at least you can rule out the v card... you know what i mean...

    why not just take him out to a gay establishment and watch what he's looking at? if it's you then it's time to take the lead... if it's everyone else, then he's either a sl*t or he's pretty new to all this...
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    Jul 29, 2011 1:15 PM GMT
    Sounds like a classic bromance.
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    Jul 29, 2011 4:01 PM GMT
    Just kiss him already!
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    Jul 29, 2011 4:33 PM GMT
    Next time he has his shirt off go behind and give him some shoulder massage . If he likes it you will know and this leads to "more" 95%of the time.
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    Jul 29, 2011 4:58 PM GMT
    Do you really want to be with someone who needs to be carried to the next step? Don't you think a functional match might have a certain effortless quality to it, even in difficult times?
  • wild_sky360

    Posts: 1492

    Jul 29, 2011 5:15 PM GMT
    He may feel out of your league, so to speak; especially if you're the only one getting compliments.

  • Jul 29, 2011 9:25 PM GMT
    Yeah he's only had an online relationship I think or maybe a girlfriend. We do hang out a lot and he is eager to hang out. I travel a lot for work so I am in town. And he has his own job the keeps him busy.

    I do worry that one day he'll tell me about his new bf and I'll shoot myself for waiting. It's just not too clear.

    It is a bromance though, and I like that a lot so I can't complain too much.

  • Aug 05, 2011 5:24 AM GMT
    So here's an update on the bromance... we were just casually talking about getting together soon and how we'd catch up on life. He said something back to me to the extent of, "I'm so glad I have good friends like you". Am I reading too much into that word choice?
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    Aug 05, 2011 5:28 AM GMT
    yes. /thread
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    Mar 24, 2012 3:15 PM GMT
    absolutely only my take, not necessarily correct as it's third hand.

    If it is not obvious to you that this seems to be requiring a lot more fuel on your part with little engine rev on his part, then you are making a problem for yourself. You will probably become a nuisance to him that at some point he may not want to deal with.

    If it were me, would indulge in that which can preoccupy my attentions more till the feeling blow over if ever. Perhaps man up really heavy and just cut it off as not happening.

    I hope that's not too harsh, but I think it's where it needs to go.

    Love, peace
    Michael

  • Mar 27, 2012 6:45 AM GMT
    why not just ask him..

    "Do you think well ever hook up?"

    b a man. get to the point
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    Mar 27, 2012 6:48 AM GMT
    I am assuming this has already been resolved? icon_smile.gif

    xx