Is race/ethnicity important to you when looking for a long-term relationship? If so why?

  • Matt2004

    Posts: 26

    Aug 05, 2011 2:36 AM GMT
    Am curious if race/ethnicity/nationality is important in the dating world and if so why? This is just a survey am doing to find out what are people looking for in a person by outside appearance..

  • qd2009

    Posts: 164

    Aug 05, 2011 3:36 AM GMT
    ^ boaziass' post is a Spam, someone plz report (I'm not verified)

    Why does it matter? It's not something you can change
    like hair style, body type, etc..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 3:39 AM GMT
    qd2009 said^ boaziass' post is a Spam, someone plz report (I'm not verified)

    Why does it matter? It's not something you can change
    like hair style, body type, etc..


    Took care of that.
  • JFitNC

    Posts: 50

    Aug 05, 2011 3:41 AM GMT
    reported the spam.

    I can't say that I have ever not dated a guy because of his race or ethnicity. I certainly have my "types" but it is more about body type, personality, security, etc. The guy I am with now is white and we have been together 9 months,.
  • Another_Jerem...

    Posts: 355

    Aug 05, 2011 3:41 AM GMT
    There are many threads on RJ related to this subject, and they tend to go nowhere. Prepare yourself for some idiotic comments.

    White guys will insist it has nothing to do with the transfer of racist ideologies from mainstream culture and people of color will insist it does. Obviously race is important to some people. Almost every gay black man I've ever met has confirmed that not being white eliminates a lot of prospects within the homo dating pool. But there again, homo dating tends to be short-lived and largely focused on sexual gratification.

    No one who is concerned about your race is anyone you need to be with anyway. And the ones who are will grow up when their age relegates them to the same low place on the totem pole that non-white men occupy.
  • qd2009

    Posts: 164

    Aug 05, 2011 3:44 AM GMT
    Another_Jeremy saidWhite guys will insist it has nothing to do with the transfer of racist ideologies from mainstream culture and people of color will insist it does. Obviously race is important to some people. Almost every gay black man I've ever met has confirmed that not being white eliminates a lot of prospects within the homo dating pool. But there again, homo dating tends to be short-lived and largely focused on sexual gratification.


    Well-summarized!
    +1
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 3:46 AM GMT
    Not as such, but I can't imagine a relationship with a guy who's had a very different experience of life or a very different upbringing. (Also I find blue eyed blonds hot.)

    That said, I resent being labeled as a racist because my "type" isn't black. Did it ever occur to the racism is everywhere crew that people are more likely to be attracted to people who look like their fathers and mothers -- or the people they grew up with? If not, Google it with anthropology as there's quite a bit of research.
  • justinlee86

    Posts: 501

    Aug 05, 2011 3:48 AM GMT
    I dont think race matters...not to me.

    I do know that a lot of guys are not attracted to other races for some reason...

    Personally there are hotties in every race or ethnicity!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 3:50 AM GMT
    I only date white men,because they Smell purtty,look purtty & make me feel purtty.When I go out I make sure I take my white man with me,so everyone knows how purtty I am,Because having a white man means I'm on a higher social scale than shanaynay & kiki.
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    Aug 05, 2011 3:53 AM GMT
    Lenoxx said I only date white men,because they Smell purtty,look purtty & make me feel purtty.When I go out I make sure I take my white man with me,so everyone knows how purtty I am,Because having a white man means I'm on a higher social scale than shanaynay & kiki.


    lol
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 4:04 AM GMT
    No, but there were situations long ago where I regret being to timid to have asked, I was young and from corn country. I'm glad I finally grew up.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 4:09 AM GMT
    Race - does not matter

    Nationality - yes, matters. French #1. Other things #2.

    Religion - likely does not matter as long as it is a respectful two-way street if we are not identical

    Socioeconomic status - matters the most. If we have different vocabulary (i.e. he only talks in slang) then it is not even going to lead to a first date since I give up really easy on trying to translate outlandish slang and idioms I have never heard before. I am sure it is the same way others feel when they talk to me, I often feel like Private Joe Bowers in the film Idiocracy. I speak proper English, ergo I talk like a ***

    To answer your question - outside appearance means pretty little, what's inside dictates whether there is any interest in a first, second, and third date.
  • Matt2004

    Posts: 26

    Aug 05, 2011 5:00 AM GMT
    justinlee86 saidI dont think race matters...not to me.

    I do know that a lot of guys are not attracted to other races for some reason...

    Personally there are hotties in every race or ethnicity!!!


    I agree with you!!
  • Matt2004

    Posts: 26

    Aug 05, 2011 5:01 AM GMT
    Lenoxx said I only date white men,because they Smell purtty,look purtty & make me feel purtty.When I go out I make sure I take my white man with me,so everyone knows how purtty I am,Because having a white man means I'm on a higher social scale than shanaynay & kiki.


    lol
  • Matt2004

    Posts: 26

    Aug 05, 2011 5:02 AM GMT
    qd2009 said^ boaziass' post is a Spam, someone plz report (I'm not verified)

    Why does it matter? It's not something you can change
    like hair style, body type, etc..



    who cares ..boaziass is a spam ...report it and move on
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    Aug 05, 2011 5:09 AM GMT
    Lenoxx said I only date white men,because they Smell purtty,look purtty & make me feel purtty.When I go out I make sure I take my white man with me,so everyone knows how purtty I am,Because having a white man means I'm on a higher social scale than shanaynay & kiki.


    I assume that that's satire. Unfortunately, it's probably true for some people, but we'll hope not very many.
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4864

    Aug 05, 2011 5:13 AM GMT
    Actually, race should not matter. All races have their share of good looking people and people of good character. However, we are not always rational. Many of us are unduly influenced by physical appearance.

    I happen to find some black guys especially attractive. Perhaps that's because I tend to identify with people who have been constantly put down and unfairly treated; I don't know. Even so, I would never turn down anyone because of race.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 5:14 AM GMT
    WHITE DUDES!

    ...and I'm not gonna appoligize for liking what I like.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 5:17 AM GMT
    Matt2004 saidAm curious if race/ethnicity/nationality is important in the dating world and if so why? This is just a survey am doing to find out what are people looking for in a person by outside appearance..



    Does number of eyelashes matter?

    Does color of fingernails matter?

    No and no.

    If race/nationally didn't matter, you wouldn't have to ask about it :0)

    Many people don't find certain races attractive (or conversely, finds them attractive but not worth dating long term).

    Personally, I don't get this this each individual person is different (to me). But if you hold stereotypes that in your mind paint everyone of a certain race as looking and/or acting the same then, of course, you see it differently.

    Some black guys don't find "white guys" attractive (okay, so you'd rather date Al Roker than Tom Brady? Whatever floats your boat. I guess all whites are hideous to you, More white meat for me.)

    Some white guys don't find "blacks and asians" attractive and only date "whites and latins" (okay, so you find Rush Limbaugh and Cheech Marin hotter than Shemar Moore or Leehom Wang? Oooookay, I guess all blacks and asians look unattractive to you. More dark meat for me.)

    That is the logic of blanket stereotyping, but there you go. Personally, I'm thankful when people express these preferences up front. Just keeps everybody from wasting time.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 5:18 AM GMT
    That's a very strange question to me. I have no idea why that would be taken into consideration. I will view this thread to see if there's a reasonable explanation for that consideration. Seems so weird.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 5:40 AM GMT
    I went on a few dates with a guy who was like "i'm a meat and potatos guy, like brothers and sisters and Vanessa Carlton etc." So obviously that wasn't going to work out. I think it was our incompatible contemporary cultural preferences rather than physical preferences that would be important in a LTR. But then again maybe being some polar opposite works for you.

    idk, i hate these threads, pretty fish like other pretty fish.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 6:32 AM GMT
    I find guys other than white guys to be more attractive actually. Ethnic is sexy to me because its different and I like a different view from a different guy. I honestly find latin men to be sexy and I like their style.
  • tautomer

    Posts: 1010

    Aug 05, 2011 6:37 AM GMT
    Nope. There are some races that I am attracted to a lot more, and others that I am not attracted to at all. What person person I happen to fall for though, is a completely independent factor of race.

    Culture however, is very important. It has to be compatiable. I dated a guy who was born and raised in kuwait until he was 18. We could not match up completely due to cultural differences, and that one (of many) factors that caused me to have to end it with him.
  • dancedancekj

    Posts: 1761

    Aug 05, 2011 7:11 AM GMT
    Agreed on culture, rather than race being the deciding factor.

    This sounds bad, but I enjoyed dating 3rd+ generation American Caucasian men for the simple fact that we only have one set of cultural cues between the two of us (my wonderful Korean background). While that sounds selfish, I have enough problems keeping my own cultural cues in mind and having my partner learn them, much less learning a whole other culture and their set of traditions (does that make me lazy? I guess it does).

    That's not to say that I couldn't make it work. I think it would just take more time and effort for both of us to understand each other. But for me it is just easier to date someone who doesn't have a separate culture beyond being American. Stating this probably makes me look like a d-bag...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 05, 2011 8:29 AM GMT
    Another_Jeremy saidWhite guys will insist it has nothing to do with the transfer of racist ideologies from mainstream culture and people of color will insist it does. Obviously race is important to some people. Almost every gay black man I've ever met has confirmed that not being white eliminates a lot of prospects within the homo dating pool. But there again, homo dating tends to be short-lived and largely focused on sexual gratification


    I concur.

    On a more fundamental level, while I accept that people will inevitably have their preferences, what I find less acceptable is when some people emphasize what they are NOT into in their profiles. How about focusing on what they do like instead? I have seen too many white Australians declare that they are "not into Asians". It's worse when I see "not into fems or Asians", which indicates a stereotypical impression that Asian men are necessarily effeminate. Without exception, there is no reference to black, latino, other species... Just Asians. I'm unsure if this behavior is a common occurrence in America or elsewhere in the world. I sure hope not.