The Forgotten Seniors in the LGBT Community

  • metta

    Posts: 39158

    Aug 09, 2011 3:37 PM GMT
    The Forgotten Seniors in the LGBT Community

    http://10thousandcouples.com/issue/august-2011/article/the-forgotten-seniors-in-the-lgbt-community
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2011 4:01 PM GMT
    "They are twice as likely as straight seniors to live alone, and 10 times less likely to have someone take care of them if they fall ill."

    Oy. Depressing. icon_cry.gif

    Brings new meaning to the old Bette davis quip: 'Getting old is not for sissies.'
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2011 6:16 PM GMT
    Now that I'm 50, I've been wondering what it will be like to be a gay senior, especially if I'm alone later.

    But... on the bright side, I just got my first senior discount at a restaurant!
  • aaronkei

    Posts: 211

    Aug 09, 2011 7:02 PM GMT
    Being alone does worry me. I guess I will take life as it comes and deal with it accordingly
  • Aquanerd

    Posts: 845

    Aug 09, 2011 7:09 PM GMT
    Once you reach a certain age, and especially if you have a parent that ends up in Hospice Care, you can't help but wonder, who is going to be there to wipe my ass. I immediately started volunteering for a local Hospice organization. Being in Atlanta, there is no shortage of need for volunteers that are LGBT "friendly." Plus you meet some amazing people, young and old. I encourage everyone that is wondering the same thing, gets involved with a local Hospice group.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2011 7:09 PM GMT
    Wait wait wait, back the fuck up hoes...

    The elderly are people?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2011 7:18 PM GMT
    Well I can personally promise you, nobody gives a fuck about an old guy. At least not online and not here on RJ.

    Fortunately I have a wide circle of friends in real life. But do you think most guys here care about an old geezer? Of course they don't.

    Though I will say, I get the most lovely e-mails from a very few guys here, who do thank me for my posts.

    But I get an equal amount of hate mail, from US right-wingers, who are compelled to tell me how much they hate gay guys like myself. I'm kinda used to right-wing, conservative hatred, but it's still tough to read it. I wonder why they're on this site.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2011 7:38 PM GMT
    The situation is exacerbated in the gay world because our culture barely tolerates aging. Men slowly become invisible until all that's left is... their money.

    Weird things are afoot, tho, as boomer gays refuse to fade away. I call it "the graying of the meccas." Remember when Palm Springs was a party town for LA club jocks? Now, single, young men you see are often employees of gay couples enjoying their retirement years.

    And Ft. Lauderdale. Whoa. That town is packed with gray-gays who have money and the men who are trying to get it from them. Strange days.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2011 7:39 PM GMT
    This troubles me and actually worries me a bit.
  • metta

    Posts: 39158

    Aug 09, 2011 7:46 PM GMT
    Most of the retirement centers are so ridiculously expensive. I think the Golden Girl's Show had the right idea. They should design homes where all of the bedrooms are master bedrooms.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 09, 2011 7:52 PM GMT
    Art_Deco saidWell I can personally promise you, nobody gives a fuck about an old guy. At least not online and not here on RJ.

    Fortunately I have a wide circle of friends in real life. But do you think most guys here care about an old geezer? Of course they don't.

    Though I will say, I get the most lovely e-mails from a very few guys here, who do thank me for my posts.

    But I get an equal amount of hate mail, from US right-wingers, who are compelled to tell me how much they hate gay guys like myself. I'm kinda used to right-wing, conservative hatred, but it's still tough to read it. I wonder why they're on this site.



    Nobody may "give a fuck about an old guy" sexually but who cares? Sex isn't the most important thing in life. If you're young and beautiful, a lot of people may give a fuck about you but that's only for sex. That's it. Once they get it from you, they're gone. It's fleeting and empty. Not worth much in the end. I'll bet older guys have a lot more true friends. People that care about you on the inside and not just what you look like. Being a young gay man can be just as lonely as being a gay senior. If not more lonely.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 10, 2011 3:12 AM GMT
    Do your part and volunteer.. You would be surprised by the number of older men and women who come into the LGBT Centers for help. They aren't just for teens struggling with coming out and acceptance. They are for any LGBT that needs help. They have legal services that work in connection with some centers, with well trained professionals who are knowledgeable in the legal "loopholes" for gay couples and what not. They also have medical associations that are gay-friendly who are continuously working with us to help the young and the old.
    Seriously though, we need more people working their local centers. I'll be honest its long hours, no pay, and can be really tough on the heart. Especially, watching all these kids come in who have been kicked out of their homes or have contracted who knows what. But the worse is when an elderly person comes in because they recently lost a partner and just doesn't know what to do.
    I use to work at the LGBT HQ in the Twin Cities but with my move to Florida I now goto the Panama City one which is about 4 hours away. I try to make it out every weekend. But with a military work schedule its difficult.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 10, 2011 3:17 AM GMT
    Hmmm, I always thought of opening an orphanage, and to take seniors in as well, so the different generations can be around each other, and handicapped people, so the kids could learn respect for all.. like it should be....

    This would be a good part of the project
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Aug 10, 2011 3:21 AM GMT
    Chainers saidWait wait wait, back the fuck up hoes...

    The elderly are people?


    You know, 99 percent of the time I love what you post in the forums. You have a fantastic personality and like the fact you have a quick wit that brings a smile to everyone.

    Your quote above came off as hurtful, even if you didn't intend for it to be. Now maybe to you, I might be "elderly" as I just turned 57, but I sure don't feel it. And I don't look at (and really you shouldn't either) people over a certain age as "elderly." We are all "people" regardless of our birth year. Please think about this as one day you'll be my age. I might be gone from this earth by that time and maybe you'll remember me and what I said here in this post....and think......
  • Vaughn

    Posts: 1880

    Aug 10, 2011 3:31 AM GMT
    miamimasseur said
    Art_Deco saidWell I can personally promise you, nobody gives a fuck about an old guy. At least not online and not here on RJ.

    Fortunately I have a wide circle of friends in real life. But do you think most guys here care about an old geezer? Of course they don't.

    Though I will say, I get the most lovely e-mails from a very few guys here, who do thank me for my posts.

    But I get an equal amount of hate mail, from US right-wingers, who are compelled to tell me how much they hate gay guys like myself. I'm kinda used to right-wing, conservative hatred, but it's still tough to read it. I wonder why they're on this site.



    Nobody may "give a fuck about an old guy" sexually but who cares? Sex isn't the most important thing in life. If you're young and beautiful, a lot of people may give a fuck about you but that's only for sex. That's it. Once they get it from you, they're gone. It's fleeting and empty. Not worth much in the end. I'll bet older guys have a lot more true friends. People that care about you on the inside and not just what you look like. Being a young gay man can be just as lonely as being a gay senior. If not more lonely.


    I always try to be friends with older gay guys but they always try to get into my pants. Persistently. Then they turn into deuschers.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 10, 2011 3:31 AM GMT
    Aquanerd saidOnce you reach a certain age, and especially if you have a parent that ends up in Hospice Care, you can't help but wonder, who is going to be there to wipe my ass.


    I'll wipe your ass.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 10, 2011 3:32 AM GMT
    All seniors are forgotten. But their memories are shot, so it evens out.
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Aug 10, 2011 3:41 AM GMT
    Art_Deco saidWell I can personally promise you, nobody gives a fuck about an old guy. At least not online and not here on RJ.

    Fortunately I have a wide circle of friends in real life. But do you think most guys here care about an old geezer? Of course they don't.

    Though I will say, I get the most lovely e-mails from a very few guys here, who do thank me for my posts.

    But I get an equal amount of hate mail, from US right-wingers, who are compelled to tell me how much they hate gay guys like myself. I'm kinda used to right-wing, conservative hatred, but it's still tough to read it. I wonder why they're on this site.


    + .05....

    I have been so fortunate to have many good RJ buddies under the age of 25. They like me for who I am and how I respect others. It wasn't always the case as there were a few that considered me to be too old to even be alive (yeah, one said I was so old I should be dead....). And some days I'm 57 going on 21.....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 10, 2011 3:46 AM GMT
    Art_Deco saidWell I can personally promise you, nobody gives a fuck about an old guy. At least not online and not here on RJ.

    Fortunately I have a wide circle of friends in real life. But do you think most guys here care about an old geezer? Of course they don't.

    Though I will say, I get the most lovely e-mails from a very few guys here, who do thank me for my posts.

    But I get an equal amount of hate mail, from US right-wingers, who are compelled to tell me how much they hate gay guys like myself. I'm kinda used to right-wing, conservative hatred, but it's still tough to read it. I wonder why they're on this site.


    In what country? I am always paying attention to the elder people, even here on RJ.. in other countries we respect elders and what they say... the way they treat their elders in the north I find absolutely disgusting and its one of the few things I will never tolerate about other cultures.. when they disrespect their elders
  • TallGWMvballe...

    Posts: 1925

    Aug 10, 2011 3:49 AM GMT
    The posts here are interesting.
    Several have used this forum to post sarcastic funny (to them perhaps) negative jabs at gay seniors...
    Some are showing thoughtful compassion.

    Think about this young un's;
    IF you are lucky enough and are healthy enough to even reach the age of people you hate so much now, how will YOU want and expect to be treated by your peers and the younger ones.
  • TallGWMvballe...

    Posts: 1925

    Aug 10, 2011 3:54 AM GMT
    and by the way, at 64 years old, I compete against mostly 20 and 30 somethings ..... just won my 7th Gold Medal for Volleyball in this last year !

    Let's see if the young haters will be able to even walk when/if they reach 50 or 60.

    PLEASE be respectful and treat everyone well. We all have good and bad points/qualities and are worth knowing and showing kindness.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 10, 2011 4:03 AM GMT
    Chainers saidWait wait wait, back the fuck up hoes...

    The elderly are people?


    Ya know...there are times when your brand of humor is just plain fucking RUDE !!! And don't even start with that shit about "it was only a joke"
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Aug 10, 2011 4:05 AM GMT
    GreenHopper said
    Art_Deco saidWell I can personally promise you, nobody gives a fuck about an old guy. At least not online and not here on RJ.

    Fortunately I have a wide circle of friends in real life. But do you think most guys here care about an old geezer? Of course they don't.

    Though I will say, I get the most lovely e-mails from a very few guys here, who do thank me for my posts.

    But I get an equal amount of hate mail, from US right-wingers, who are compelled to tell me how much they hate gay guys like myself. I'm kinda used to right-wing, conservative hatred, but it's still tough to read it. I wonder why they're on this site.


    In what country? I am always paying attention to the elder people, even here on RJ.. in other countries we respect elders and what they say... the way they treat their elders in the north I find absolutely disgusting and its one of the few things I will never tolerate about other cultures.. when they disrespect their elders


    Very true. You have always been kind and respectful towards me. That's why I think you rock!
  • turtleneckjoc...

    Posts: 4685

    Aug 10, 2011 4:22 AM GMT
    Vaughn said
    miamimasseur said
    Art_Deco saidWell I can personally promise you, nobody gives a fuck about an old guy. At least not online and not here on RJ.

    Fortunately I have a wide circle of friends in real life. But do you think most guys here care about an old geezer? Of course they don't.

    Though I will say, I get the most lovely e-mails from a very few guys here, who do thank me for my posts.

    But I get an equal amount of hate mail, from US right-wingers, who are compelled to tell me how much they hate gay guys like myself. I'm kinda used to right-wing, conservative hatred, but it's still tough to read it. I wonder why they're on this site.



    Nobody may "give a fuck about an old guy" sexually but who cares? Sex isn't the most important thing in life. If you're young and beautiful, a lot of people may give a fuck about you but that's only for sex. That's it. Once they get it from you, they're gone. It's fleeting and empty. Not worth much in the end. I'll bet older guys have a lot more true friends. People that care about you on the inside and not just what you look like. Being a young gay man can be just as lonely as being a gay senior. If not more lonely.


    I always try to be friends with older gay guys but they always try to get into my pants. Persistently. Then they turn into deuschers.


    I don't want to start another war here, but last year when I was quasi-new here, I tried to initiate a conversation with you---and you ignored the hell out of me. Never once did I even suggest getting "into your pants."

    Every now and then this topic of "Young Versus Older" shows up in the forums and turns into examples of "Us Versus Them." As a suggestion, I would like to see some of the younger guys here take the lead...and take ownership...of changing the mindset of their own peers and educating those into accepting gay guys of all ages. As a "seasoned in life matters" individual I, along with many others in my age group, have tried to reach out to younger guys only to hear, "creeper," "old bastard," and other negative remarks hurled at us. As a group, older and younger, I believe we should work together on changing this mindset and not talk about it so much. What do you guys think???
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 10, 2011 4:32 AM GMT
    PaulNKS said
    But... on the bright side, I just got my first senior discount at a restaurant!


    lol thats so awesome.