Aug 11, 2011 1:57 PM GMT
The depression has hit everybody...
I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can't afford batteries.
CEO's are not playing miniature golf, because their salaries are in the millions.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
A stripper was killed when her audience showered her with rolls of
pennies while she danced.
I saw a Mormon polygamist with only one wife.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call
them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ounce.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and
they've re-possessed her.
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
A picture is now worth only 200 words.
The Treasure Island Casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
Congress says they are looking into the Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh
Great! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated
by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs,
my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the
Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told
them I was suicidal, they got excited and asked if I could drive a