Help :(

  • PKP223

    Posts: 30

    Aug 19, 2011 2:33 PM GMT
    Ok so I guess its time I seek advice because I'm at a complete loss as to what to do in a situation I'm stuck in with a guy so I figured why not get some help from people with relationship experience, or at least better experience then my first and only relationship.

    So I met this guy in my hometown, he was there visiting family and he happened to be at a club that I went to one night with friends, we hit it off instantly and the rest of the time he was in town we hung out together. Well of course he had to leave and it sucked because he lives in OK. He's 21 and he plays college football, so he's a total jock, really cute, really funny, but he has a hard time telling me how he feels and we've gotten in several arguments because of it and the only time he'll tell me how he actually feels is when he's not happy with me or something like that. Other then that we text non-stop 24/7, when one of us falls asleep we just pick the convo right back up when we wake up.

    Recently the texting and talking has been getting short and not as fun as it used to be, I feel like its the distance and as much as I want to call it quits I can't. But then last night as I was texting him he out of the blue comments that he's on the phone with his wtf? I didn't know what to say so I just stopped texting him and tried to go to sleep (unsuccessfully), then I wake up to a text telling me all the things they talked about, which seemed like small talk, but he was also saying how they were playfully arguing about how each other was dumb or whatever and that his ex was commenting on how big he's gotten in every way literally? o_O

    It hurts and I just didn't text him back, his ex-boyfriend lives and goes to school where he is and I don't, I'm thinking its time to call it quits but I feel like I found a good guy and I don't want to....

    Help? icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 19, 2011 3:12 PM GMT
    Move on, yes is hard, but sometimes that is the best solution IMHO.....good luck
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    Aug 19, 2011 3:17 PM GMT

    Talk to him, not us!

    Seriously, confront him and ask direct questions such as:

    Are we both wasting our time
    Are we giving this a go, or have you lost interest
    Why are you talking about your ex and giving me so much detail

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    Aug 19, 2011 3:28 PM GMT
    Your not the only one that deals with this problem... Distance plays a huge part into this... But if he's into you I wouldn't worry about it, insecurity and mistrust hurts the relationship... I say continue the friendship and see what happens... If nothing moves forward in a month or so I'd say move on but at least you should keep him around as a friend...
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    Aug 19, 2011 3:30 PM GMT
    Distance is a big piece.

    He's also probably just over it.

    Move on. Find someone else who fulfills whatever needs that your current "man" isn't.

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    Aug 19, 2011 3:31 PM GMT
    For him to tell you that he's on the phone with the ex, and then later give you unsolicited details about the conversation, including "how big he's gotten" seems like a really pathetic way of telling you that he is interested in his ex again. I hope I'm wrong, and yes, you need to confront him, and find out from him. You may not hear what you want, but you'll avoid being let down in the weak way he may be preparing you for. Or maybe he's clueless and still cares for you... you'll only find out from him though.

    Hope it all works out for you..

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    Aug 19, 2011 6:56 PM GMT
    Why are you wasting time and energy on this guy?
    You are young, cute, and single.
    Are there no gay bars around where you are? Are there no gay men anywhere around you? Do you not have access to the internet? Do you not have friends that know guys they can introduce you to? Do you not leave your room and go out where there are avalible men? Is there not a gym or a social club around you where you are? A church? A running track?

    GO OUT! Here's a news flash for you.....there are HUNDREDS of other men out there that will be interested in you...they want to talk to you...they want to text you...they want to be interested and hear about your day...they want to have sex with you....

    They are out there waiting on you....they are NOT going to come knocking on your door...

    Just get out and do what you like to do and believe are going to have guys coming at you left, right and sideways.....

    GET OUT THERE.....
    YOU ARE WASTING YOUR TIME AND YOUR YOUTH.......icon_biggrin.gif