How do you know that you're making the right choices?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 5:41 AM GMT
    Hello dahlings,

    I just wanted to share some of my thoughts with you... and hear what you have to say about it.

    Lately I am feeling a bit unhappy with my life and that is not typical for me, because I generally thought I was living the way I have always wanted to... at least I think so. But sometimes I feel like there is this huge void in my life and that nothing I have is what I really want... and I can't say I have a bad life - I have a nice family, live in my own apartment, have a great job, nice friends, I go out, I have fun.... ok, I do not have a boyfriend, but that's not THAT bad icon_rolleyes.gif
    So I was just wondering - maybe I should be doing something totally different for a living, or move to a different country or something...

    How do YOU know that you have made the right choice in your life? icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 5:44 AM GMT
    fulldelight saidHow do YOU know that you have made the right choice in your life? icon_rolleyes.gif
    When your choice doesn't get you killed.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 6:07 AM GMT
    lots of people will go through life with an idea of what the best choice is.. but I personally believe it's far simpler.

    The best choice is the choice you make. Not procrastinate over, not make and then think "Did i make the right one" no going over and over it. You make the choice and you follow the decision.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 6:22 AM GMT
    There exists no such thing as "the right choice" or "the wrong choice". These are just black and white designations we humans invent to allow us to sleep better at night.

    There are only choices. We can choose to make one and commit to it, or we can choose to make one then flake halfway and make another one and flake on that and make another and find ourselves constantly at square 1.
  • MagillaNectar

    Posts: 72

    Aug 29, 2011 1:38 PM GMT
    From my experience, you know you're making the right choice when you listen to the voice in your head initially. If you don't listen and push it down, it leads to regret and resentment.

    Events in life can be scary (talking to a cute guy you see at the bar), exciting (skydiving), depressing (volunteering at hospice), and more but it doesn't mean they are the wrong choice as long as you're listening to what you want.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 1:48 PM GMT
    I have no idea when I make the right choice.... usually the right choice is the one that goes well after.. and the wrong one that doesnt go well? i dunno :/
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 1:49 PM GMT
    fulldelight saidHello dahlings,
    >


    ZsaZsaGabor.jpg
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 1:51 PM GMT
    The right choice is the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and you won't have regrets.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 1:55 PM GMT
    Guy101 saidThe right choice is the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and you won't have regrets.


    Hmmm but what if you have to choose between two things that will both make you uncomfortable.. or two things that will make you comfortable???

    Part of it is psychological.. studies have shown that people tend to be happier if they are given a choice, and a choice has finality to it (they are less happy if they keep the option of choosing differently).... they are less happy with any choice when there are more choices available to them (you keep wondering about the choice you made)..

    also, if the choice is something very important, like a house, people are happier if they make the choice deliberately, with a lot of forethought... on the other hand, they are less happy if they give too much forethought to a less important decision.. like saying which shampoo to buy at the store... such choices are best made intuitively or spontaneously
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 2:01 PM GMT
    GreenHopper said
    Guy101 saidThe right choice is the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and you won't have regrets.


    Hmmm but what if you have to choose between two things that will both make you uncomfortable.. or two things that will make you comfortable???

    Part of it is psychological.. studies have shown that people tend to be happier if they are given a choice, and a choice has finality to it (they are less happy if they keep the option of choosing differently).... they are less happy with any choice when there are more choices available to them (you keep wondering about the choice you made)..

    also, if the choice is something very important, like a house, people are happier if they make the choice deliberately, with a lot of forethought... on the other hand, they are less happy if they give too much forethought to a less important decision.. like saying which shampoo to buy at the store... such choices are best made intuitively or spontaneously


    Like I said....the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and not having any regrets.

    It's an air tight answer. In the scenario you created above the answer would be the lesser of two evils but one you could live with and have no regrets.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 2:04 PM GMT
    Guy101 said
    GreenHopper said
    Guy101 saidThe right choice is the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and you won't have regrets.


    Hmmm but what if you have to choose between two things that will both make you uncomfortable.. or two things that will make you comfortable???

    Part of it is psychological.. studies have shown that people tend to be happier if they are given a choice, and a choice has finality to it (they are less happy if they keep the option of choosing differently).... they are less happy with any choice when there are more choices available to them (you keep wondering about the choice you made)..

    also, if the choice is something very important, like a house, people are happier if they make the choice deliberately, with a lot of forethought... on the other hand, they are less happy if they give too much forethought to a less important decision.. like saying which shampoo to buy at the store... such choices are best made intuitively or spontaneously


    Like I said....the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and not having any regrets.

    It's an air tight answer. In the scenario you created above the answer would be the lesser of two evils but one you could live with and have no regrets.


    Ehm, no not at all, I never posted it so black and white.... in my experience, there is no such thing as a choice that leaves you entirely without regrets or comfortable with yourself... because each choice has negatives and positives..... The trick to being comfortable with your choice is not to think about it after.. this is what I stated above... "they are happier if their choice has finality, and less happy if there are more available"
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 2:13 PM GMT
    GreenHopper said
    Guy101 said
    GreenHopper said
    Guy101 saidThe right choice is the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and you won't have regrets.


    Hmmm but what if you have to choose between two things that will both make you uncomfortable.. or two things that will make you comfortable???

    Part of it is psychological.. studies have shown that people tend to be happier if they are given a choice, and a choice has finality to it (they are less happy if they keep the option of choosing differently).... they are less happy with any choice when there are more choices available to them (you keep wondering about the choice you made)..

    also, if the choice is something very important, like a house, people are happier if they make the choice deliberately, with a lot of forethought... on the other hand, they are less happy if they give too much forethought to a less important decision.. like saying which shampoo to buy at the store... such choices are best made intuitively or spontaneously


    Like I said....the one that leaves you feeling happy and comfortable with yourself and not having any regrets.

    It's an air tight answer. In the scenario you created above the answer would be the lesser of two evils but one you could live with and have no regrets.


    Ehm, no not at all, I never posted it so black and white.... in my experience, there is no such thing as a choice that leaves you entirely without regrets or comfortable with yourself... because each choice has negatives and positives..... The trick to being comfortable with your choice is not to think about it after.. this is what I stated above... "they are happier if their choice has finality, and less happy if there are more available"


    That's more of an opinion and not a fact and that would just be your experience and not the experiences of others who clearly would view things differently from you. Who's to say it isn't that black and white for others? Not every choice has a negative side. Some are just damn good to begin with and sometimes end up better then expected.

    Again my answer is pretty air tight but given that you think otherwise is an opinion best suited for you. Whatever floats your boat and keeps the wind in your sails I say. Case in point. You can choice to continue or not continue to debt with me on this and depending on who you talk to and what their view is there is no negative or positive to the choice you make. In any case I'm sure whatever the decision is you make you won't have any regrets. LOL.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 2:32 PM GMT
    If you're doing what-if-coulda-shoulda-woulda on your current choices, in all likelihood, you'd be doing the same even if the choices had been totally different. IMO, a better goal than endless pursuit of the right choices is finding equanimity with the choices you've already made.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 29, 2011 2:48 PM GMT
    When the results of your choices make you happy and/or or make you think that it's all worth it.