Dating 2 Guys, Which one stays?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 08, 2008 10:57 PM GMT
    I am currently dating 2 wonderful men
    The Pros...

    "P" is
    35 yo
    Latino
    great body
    even greater lover (Top only)
    lives minutes from my ranch
    has his own 2-story house
    is very supportive of my ideas/well-being
    works 2 jobs

    "B" is
    49 but youthful
    White (my favorite kind)
    PERFECT body, well-toned and slim
    He LOVES my body the way it is right now!
    The most beautiful dick I've ever seen!
    Lives in San Francisco, California
    in the military
    a doctor that travels FREQUENTLY!!
    sends me e-mails/phone calls asking about my day
    Fierce versatile lover!
    Loves my smile!

    -----now for the cons

    "P"
    Lives with and cares for a senior citizen with AIDS
    I'm not typically attracted to Latino men
    His face is not attractive to my tastes
    Likes phone sex (and I don't)
    is a pure TOP
    in the closet

    "B"
    Lives too far
    only visits me once a month for a week
    Always busy when we are away
    has not mentioned anything long term between us
    All about the sex sex sex...


    Ok, so...that's my dilema.



  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 08, 2008 11:18 PM GMT
    Good luck, and I mean that sincerely. It does not sound to me like a comfortable place to be unless everyone can enjoy sharing.

    Charlie
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 12:27 AM GMT
    Jadamo, you're asking the wrong question.

    What do you want in your life? Get clear on that. Then you might pick P or B or both or neither. Why put a binary choice to a bunch of people who have no idea what you want for yourself? This is a purely subjective you-centred question.

    You obviously want an attractive versatile lover who loves you just the way you are who is supportive and financially stable and who has a good job, and who lives nearby and is interested in a long-term relationship.

    Ummm, sounds like you have neither here.

    OR if you're determined to keep one, then you tell us:

    Which is more important to you if you could pick only one:

    a white sex-fiend you rarely see (not much of a "date scenario anyway)

    OR

    a closeted local top.

    Sounds like two f**kbuddies to me.

    Why "date" them?

    Just sayin'
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 12:35 AM GMT
    I'll be blunt and can only tell what I'd do - dump both of them.
  • UncleverName

    Posts: 741

    May 09, 2008 12:35 AM GMT
    I think OutdoorAthlete has a good point. Which makes me wonder why you are even thinking of choosing right now. Did one of them ask you? Is one of them unhappy with how things are right now? Or do you want something more long term?

    Considering the current state of things, it sounds like you could just continue exactly where you're at, and be happy, if that's what you want.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 3:05 AM GMT
    go for the military doc! he sounds hot!icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 3:53 AM GMT
    RunintheCity saidI'll be blunt and can only tell what I'd do - dump both of them.



    I agree. Your pros for both of them aren't strong enough to maintain a relationship. Your just infatuated with the idea of both - sorry to be harsh.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 4:52 AM GMT
    Just have Fun as it seem's neither are right for you?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 4:54 AM GMT
    neither sounds like a relationship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 10:27 AM GMT
    anim_lol.gifanim_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 09, 2008 10:42 AM GMT
    Neither.

    You should be with someone who meets at leasts most of your 'needs' and some of your 'wants'. It seems that both of these guys meet a bunch of 'wants', but few of your 'needs'.

    Enjoy yourself in the meantime, but don't invest anything into expectations with either of these guys.
  • boxerjockx

    Posts: 9

    May 10, 2008 12:42 AM GMT
    I agree with a good majority here on choosing neither.

    Find someone who meets some of your needs and wants.

    Good Luck man.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 10, 2008 12:55 AM GMT
    The one you love the most, it really is that simple. Find someone totally different sounds like a good plan too! icon_twisted.gif
  • HereNBoston

    Posts: 221

    May 10, 2008 4:11 AM GMT
    I'm going to agree with the rest of the replies, and i'll add that you didn't really say how either of them make you feel. matters of the heart aren't usually so rational, so finding a "good on paper guy" probably won't yield the results you're hoping for. with that, enjoy it. see where it goes. but i'll agree that it seems neither of them meet your needs entirely.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    May 10, 2008 11:49 AM GMT
    You know the answer...

    We can't tell you which one to pick
    which one do you like spending time with?
    ...in or out of bed
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    May 10, 2008 5:51 PM GMT
    Wow, so insightful.

    Thanks for the advice, and I really did leave out the part about how they make me feel. I suppose I was just shocked at the mere fact that I came from being TOALLY ignored by men, to now having to decide a potential bf.

    Truthfully, I just want someone who is spontaneaous, but realistic. Right now, I feel like a woman who wants to get married...Crazy, but it's true.icon_lol.gif

    How long does it take to find trust in someone? There is no right answer for that question, I know.

    I'm settling into a very fruitful and financially stable life - FINALLY - and I want to find someone who I can trust and ultimately SHARE my wealth and love with.

    The feelings gotta be mutual, right?

    I'll play out these two guys and see which one stands out the most, I just don't know for how long I should do it...