Haha, why is it so painful?

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    Sep 03, 2011 2:20 AM GMT
    I wish I could just take a pill and get rid of any emotions related to love, attraction or sex. There's this guy that is just AMAZING, in so many ways. I knew from the moment I saw him that I would like him. That's why I tried to avoid him as much as I could, but today he got a bit tipsy and came up to me and started talking.

    At first I was trying to keep it brief and just politely answer his question. However, a whole conversation ensued after his question. A very interesting one as well. He is enormously intelligent, so humble, so charming and handsome. He is funny, classy and nerdy at the same time.

    And then he asked me if I have a girlfriend, and I said no and asked him if he does. He said no too and then he told me that he was desperately looking for a girlfriend. I knew he is straight, it was very obvious, but you always allow yourself that tiny bit of hope and he just took that away from me LOL.

    I really hope he'll forget we ever had a conversation and all and that we will just go back to our friendly 'hello, how are you's'. Otherwise it will just hurt.

    I am sorry to bother you all with this crap, it's just that I don't have anyone to share it with so and I just need to get it off my chest.
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    Sep 03, 2011 2:57 AM GMT
    In love with straight guy thread.
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    Sep 03, 2011 2:10 PM GMT
    I remember those days.

    All it took was a conversation, a bit of friendliness from a guy, and I was hooked, but they were always straight. I thought when I started coming out in high school that guys would be desperate to tell me that they were gay or bi also, but no one ever did. It just made the girls want to talk to me about their relationship issues because I liked guys too.

    My advice, simply choose not to go there. It was such a relief when I grew up and started dating guys because so much of that anxiety went away, but you'll always meet straight guys you find attractive. Just take it for what its worth. He's an attractive guy with an awesome personality and thats it.

    If you can't progress a friendship without becomming too emotionally attached, then don't. don't sit by hoping he doesn't keep speaking to you, just choose not to speak to him if you have too.

    But hopefully someday you'll be able to get past this and you'll have healthy friendships with straight men without falling in love with them. There isn't a single guy on my team that I wouldn't sleep with, but they are straight so I appreciate them as friends and human beings.

    I don't know what your situation is, but it does become SO MUCH EASIER when you get into a situation where you can be more open about yourself. I hope you get that someday.
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    Sep 03, 2011 2:14 PM GMT
    Welcome to the gay life icon_smile.gif
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    Sep 03, 2011 2:23 PM GMT
    I take it you aren't out? Just being up front about it will probably ensure he either freaks out and wont talk to you (problem solved), admits to himself he is gay and pursues you (problem eliminated) or is a secure straight guy who doesn't have a problem being friends with a gay guy and want to be friends with you (which i guess would be a worse problem for you?) so hey you have 2 in 3 chance of it turning out better then it is now.
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    Sep 03, 2011 2:26 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidIn love with straight guy thread.

    Beats in love with bi guy thread.
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    Sep 03, 2011 2:32 PM GMT
    You have to relax and just let it slide in.
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    Sep 03, 2011 3:15 PM GMT
    waimea said
    Ariodante saidIn love with straight guy thread.

    Beats in love with bi guy thread.


    haha
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    Sep 03, 2011 4:23 PM GMT


    Why is it so painful? Well, because you have a heart that loves, Monir. It's receptive and kind, and sometimes situations arise where it gets a little hurty. One day you'll meet a gay man that triggers what this man you met triggers, and by then I think you'll be very good at handling it and seeing past the feelings to determine if the man also has that love for you....icon_wink.gif


    Here's a hug

    *hug*
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    Sep 10, 2011 2:59 PM GMT
    Halfstep saidI remember those days.

    All it took was a conversation, a bit of friendliness from a guy, and I was hooked, but they were always straight. I thought when I started coming out in high school that guys would be desperate to tell me that they were gay or bi also, but no one ever did. It just made the girls want to talk to me about their relationship issues because I liked guys too.

    My advice, simply choose not to go there. It was such a relief when I grew up and started dating guys because so much of that anxiety went away, but you'll always meet straight guys you find attractive. Just take it for what its worth. He's an attractive guy with an awesome personality and thats it.

    If you can't progress a friendship without becomming too emotionally attached, then don't. don't sit by hoping he doesn't keep speaking to you, just choose not to speak to him if you have too.

    But hopefully someday you'll be able to get past this and you'll have healthy friendships with straight men without falling in love with them. There isn't a single guy on my team that I wouldn't sleep with, but they are straight so I appreciate them as friends and human beings.

    I don't know what your situation is, but it does become SO MUCH EASIER when you get into a situation where you can be more open about yourself. I hope you get that someday.


    Wow! Thank you for writing this! And thank you all for taking time to write all that really helpful stuff, despite the trollish content of my topic.

    I am sorry for my late reply, I don't have internet in my new home yet.

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    Sep 10, 2011 3:17 PM GMT
    If they aren't Bi like me...Then it ain't worth the time to have a crush...

    But feel better alright!