My experience: Manhunt: Guys lie about their status in some situations.
On this site, more than any other, it is about the 'sex'..and not the person. Online, I have experienced super aggressive guys with obnoxious sexual demands...
It is a frightening look into the entitlement these guys have regarding sex, and their lack of care and concern for the person they are with...
I have a friend who is HIV+ and displays it in his MH profile...he'll chat wih neg and poz guys often.
A typical interaction consists of
a few exchanged pleasantries and then talk of the possible sexual encounter. When he refuses sex with one of these neg guys due to being 'HIV discordant'
(he will not have sex with guys unless they are poz, like him...he believes neg with neg AND poz with poz, only) they THEN inform him that they are poz and they put neg in their profiles to be more appealing.
Shameful. Sad. Understandable.
The guideline of assuming everyone is positive seems to be a good rule of thumb...what we do with that info (oral, etc) is another decision. If there is a high enough viral load, then transmission is possible, thru oral sex.
Like redheadguy, I 'dated' a guy and then, months later, he informed me he was HIV+...he didn't know 'til recently...and is going through a terrible time of adjustment. Our romantic separation, previously, had little to do with the HIV+, there were other obstacles along the way.
I still have feelings for him, and am deciding what to do with them...
I'd like to be a good friend...my feelings go deeper than any passing romantic interest.
I truly care for him and want to be there for him...how this will pan out...not sure, yet.