SHOVED BY THE GROOM >E (F*tard)

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    Sep 05, 2011 8:15 PM GMT
    Man was I royally disgusted and insulted this night.


    I attended a (formerly) close friend of mine for her wedding. Her and two other gal pals have known me and each other for six years. They are practically sisters to me, the latter two more so.
    However tonight really made me lose all respect for her(the bride) and her new asshat husband.

    We came to them just as they ended portrait photos and while the gals and I could sense something amiss she beckoned us to come. We do so. The girls make their congratulatory kisses and shake hands . I shake the grooms hand and when I proceed to shake the bride hand and kiss tap her cheek (more of cheek cheek kiss) , the groom grabbed me by the tie and shirt and shoved me hard off and said 'that's enough'!!

    I was stunned so were the two gals. The bride didn't even say anything... We immediately left and beckoned for our car.

    Afterwards I discussed with the two other gals. Turns out he's super jealous/insecure man who comes from a conservative background (explains the trashy suit) and though he hails from London, he's a bonafide 'paandu'....

    Because of her own insecurities and wishing to get out of her fathers house. she married this guy?!! I get the feeling that she hasn't been forthcoming...Seriously she could have called ahead to inform that her now hubby doesn't like her having guy friends or me to abstain from kissing her at the event. I would have obliged, but not being given a head ups and being treated like that, when I'm her invited guest.


    I'm not even going to be in the same city anymore, I held a dinner for four of us, and she couldn't make it because of excuses. I let it go. I even let go the trivial aspect that she couldn't give me the invite even though I lived two minutes from my other friend which she gave the cards to.

    I've effectively have terminated my friendship with her . I've messaged her this once she has free time to check.

    Wish her the 'best' in the 'marriage'

    Sad to see such behavior.

  • commoncoll

    Posts: 1222

    Sep 05, 2011 8:28 PM GMT
    I'm sorry this hurtful behavior towards you. Social and cultural constraints and simple foolery have broken your friendship; I think we come from the same culture. But the bride should indeed have had some common sense and done something in the way of curtsey in warning you before hand and not ignore your friendship.
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    Sep 05, 2011 8:50 PM GMT
    mayBbignow2 saidWhat in the world is a paandu?


    Well I hope sometime in the future you or one of your friends has a sofabed or a comfortable sofa with a blanket.




    Paandu means a backward thinking person that has no grace in etiquette.

    She's moving to London while I'm returning back to Toronto. So I doubt she'll find a place of comfort so quickly.

    I am forgiving person but she has yet to make an honest to go apology nor has the ass hat husband done so.
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    Sep 05, 2011 8:52 PM GMT
    I'm sorry to hear this happened. The groom is wacko. That's not normal behavior, even for a hetero. Both of them owe you a big apology.
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    Sep 05, 2011 9:05 PM GMT
    Your friend's new hubby is a cretin.icon_evil.gif
    You were cool under pressure so kudos for that.
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    Sep 05, 2011 9:09 PM GMT
    I think your friend has just married a wife beater. If I'm wrong, I'll show my ass in Harrods window.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Sep 05, 2011 9:10 PM GMT
    Bummer that happened to you, however I would be a little easy on your friend (The Bride) to see if she makes it a point to apologize to you for her new husband's inexcusable behavior. Try to remember that in that very instant, the bride was caught up in the moment of her own wedding day, and her new husband's behavior surely embarrassed her and was all kinds of awkward. Sometimes, depending on the setting, an awkward moment like that is best left alone until the dust has settled so as to not make an already awkward moment even worse. A wedding might be one of those moments.
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    Sep 05, 2011 9:18 PM GMT
    Sure I can be patient and I can understand wedding highlights and lowlights..I'll give till tomorrow...

    I could talk about more of past behavior, but not her to slander her, but rather her husband instead.icon_mad.gif

    Guys like that have no right to procreate!
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    Sep 05, 2011 9:25 PM GMT
    The groom is a whackjob. Your friend the bride has made her decision.

    "Decision" from the Latin de=off and caedere=to cut. In other words, to cut off or away from something.

    You've been cut off or away.

    I'm sad to hear this. I hope that when the divorce comes that you might be able to forgive her and be friends with her again.
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    Sep 05, 2011 9:26 PM GMT
    Mil8 saidI think your friend has just married a wife beater. If I'm wrong, I'll show my ass in Harrods window.


    Why wait. Please feel free to share pics with us now, hotness! icon_twisted.gif
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    Sep 05, 2011 9:42 PM GMT
    Don't blame her lol .... :/
  • Chele

    Posts: 28

    Sep 05, 2011 9:45 PM GMT
    Mind telling us about the bride and the groom's ethnic backgrounds? Whether they are liberal or conservative people. Might shed some light as to how he behaved.
  • petermalaka

    Posts: 158

    Sep 05, 2011 9:45 PM GMT
    Obviously he was jelly coe you're a pretty good looking guy, OP. icon_razz.gif

    But sad to hear it happened like that. I guess you know who your trued friends are now.
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    Sep 05, 2011 11:33 PM GMT
    Mil8 saidI think your friend has just married a wife beater. If I'm wrong, I'll show my ass in Harrods window.


    What's the address of Harrod's?...The topic at hand: Seriously, the problem doesn't rest with you who posted this excellent question, but with the groom. If some day your former friend calls and wants to talk to you, you need to decide - not now - but at that time: Do I talk to her?
  • pecsman_5

    Posts: 35

    Sep 05, 2011 11:36 PM GMT
    Okay, she married an asshole. She just might need you down the road.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 05, 2011 11:36 PM GMT
    Glad you're being the bigger person...but yeah as another poster said, he was jelly because of your looks ;)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 05, 2011 11:37 PM GMT
    Feel sorry for her, buddy. He is a dick and will make her life miserable, but she is making her choices.

    When it falls apart, if she reaches out to you post seperation, you should "forgive and forget" and let her be your friend again afresh.

    While I am sorry that happened to you, what is about to happen to her is worse.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 05, 2011 11:47 PM GMT
    I'm sorry.
    Yes, that guy was out of line.

    I don't know that you need to end your friendship over this. It probably would be hard to remain friends when the husband will get jealous over any time that the two of you spend together or any communication that you have with each other.

    Take a few days to cool down and maybe you can reevaluate if you would like to remain friends.
    Brides are usually so caught up in their own emotions and what's going on in the wedding ceremony that they're usually clueless about how the guests are doing.
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    Sep 05, 2011 11:50 PM GMT
    Sounds like she ended the relationship before you did, but you didn't pick up on the clues (the missed dinner, the invite). I had a friend in the same predicament: her boyfriend was a control freak with a pretty strong personality disorder (not just my opinion). Fortunately he dumped her and she had to crawl back to her former friends. We all forgave except her very best friend.
    Wondering, though, if she belongs to a culture where unrelated men definitely don't touch women. Might explain the bizarre response of the groom( she might be his property, so to speak).
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    Sep 05, 2011 11:59 PM GMT
    this is why you can never trust girls. not that its her fault but kinda messed up she didn't say anything.
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    Sep 06, 2011 5:33 AM GMT
    Here is the background info.


    She is liberal but she trying play a person who she's not. Her family comes from a conservative background, as does the grooms family.

    What fails me is that as I found out, she never told him that she had any male friends. In fact I just found out that she's lying on other things to him and to a please her mother in law (she apparently had a bitch fest with my other female friends days earlier about this )basically she's being opposite of what the person she is.

    I know the wedding etiquette, don't kiss the bride unless she is , your sister or relative etc but I personally known her for several years and I was confidant at one point. We were close.

    I know people change but this was grossly out of line. Lets see if an apology even comes.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 06, 2011 6:00 AM GMT
    So let me get this straight (LOL).

    You attended a close friends wedding and you didn't even know anything about the groom and hadn't heard anything about this dude yet until this incident to which your information came from two lady friends of the bride who you claim are like sisters yet they didn't tell you anything about him til after the fact.

    You should reevaluate this friendship and maybe a little about yourself for getting so bent out of shape because the groom got defensive that a stranger was kissing HIS bride on their wedding. Rethink this before you get so upset.

    This is hilarious nonetheless.
  • suedeheadscot

    Posts: 1130

    Sep 06, 2011 12:14 PM GMT
    Fivealive saidTurns out he's super jealous/insecure man who comes from a conservative background (explains the trashy suit) and though he hails from London, he's a bonafide 'paandu'....


    What the hell's a paandu?????

    By the look of it, your pal married a complete dickhead. Is a paandu a dickhead?
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    Sep 06, 2011 12:17 PM GMT
    mayBbignow2 said
    Guy101 saidSo let me get this straight (LOL).

    You attended a close friends wedding and you didn't even know anything about the groom and hadn't heard anything about this dude yet until this incident to which your information came from two lady friends of the bride who you claim are like sisters yet they didn't tell you anything about him til after the fact.

    You should reevaluate this friendship and maybe a little about yourself for getting so bent out of shape because the groom got defensive that a stranger was kissing HIS bride on their wedding. Rethink this before you get so upset.

    This is hilarious nonetheless.


    I dont find this funny.

    Its not like they tongue kissed and he should have knew who fivealive was since they are partners and all.

    LIke I said- sofa + blanket


    Well I do find it funny and as I pointed out in my previous post if he was that good of a friend with the bride (who he considered a sister mind you) then he would've already known about the groom. As you can clearly see he didn't. Also why should the bride have to apologize for what the groom did.

    The groom didn't know him and he got somewhat protective. That's actually pretty natural considering the grooms position since he doesn't know Fivealive.

    Sometimes it helps if people step outside their box and view all the angles instead of just going to the first corner that seems comfortable for them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 06, 2011 8:36 PM GMT
    Incidentally, does anyone else think 'SHOVED BY THE GROOM' sounds like a Hollywood rom-com? I think there is a screenplay there.