Does this bother you too?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 2:16 AM GMT
    It bothers me how many times you have to tell someone that you're in a monogamous relationship and you don't sleep around... What's wrong with just being friends? And would a "real friend" keep pushing himself on you, knowing that if you do sleep together it would ruin your relationship?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 2:18 AM GMT
    He sounds like a nut case.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    May 14, 2008 2:51 AM GMT
    I second that... he isn't a friend at all, he doesn't respect you or your relationship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 2:58 AM GMT
    Meh, just beat the shit out of him the next time he pesters you. Either he'll piss off or become a friend. It would only be misdemeanor assault. /shrug
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 3:26 AM GMT
    That's pretty much how I feel too... Being someone that just doesn't cross those kind of boundries, I just can't figure out why friends would want to put you in a place to ruin your relationship. And it seems to happen all the time. And it's just not one friend that is doing this.

    It's very strange to me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 5:58 AM GMT
    Friend's are Friend's.... Lover's are Lover's easy eh?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 6:17 AM GMT
    Gay men and their dicks. A rising dick has no conscious. I've seen time , and times again. A gay guy dismissing another's partner, because he dose not want him too get in the way of what he wants.

    I am so glad I have control over my dick, and it does not control me, or if I had a good weekend or not.

    No root = bad weekend.
    root = good weekend.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 6:35 AM GMT
    I had a situation a couple years back where I had one of those friends that was constantly trying to make it something more even when I was in a relationship. I should have paid more attention to the warning signs and ended the friendship before he went into full blown stalker mode. My advice is get this guy out of your life before he starts showing up outside your partner's work and trying to follow him down the street, through the mall and within a block of the police station.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 7:20 AM GMT
    polobutt saidIt bothers me how many times you have to tell someone that you're in a monogamous relationship and you don't sleep around... What's wrong with just being friends? And would a "real friend" keep pushing himself on you, knowing that if you do sleep together it would ruin your relationship?


    Tell him to get lost. You already know the answer to your own question. No, a real friend wouldn't keep pushing himself on you.
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    May 14, 2008 8:21 AM GMT
    Pattison said
    I am so glad I have controle over my dick, and it does not controlw me, or if I had a good weekend or not.


    Pat, You're the same age I am. It's much easier to have control over you dick at age 46 than when you're younger. Duh.
  • MikePhilPerez

    Posts: 4357

    May 14, 2008 8:38 AM GMT
    Pattison saidGay men and their dicks. A rising dick has no conscious. I've seen time , and times again. A gay guy dismissing anothers partnre, because he dose not want him top get in the way of what he wants.

    I am so glad I have controle over my dick, and it does not controlw me, or if I had a good weekend or not.

    No root = bad weekend.
    root = good weekend.




    How many boyfriends did you say you have icon_question.gif

    Are you sure you have control icon_question.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 9:18 AM GMT
    MikePhil said[quote][cite]Pattison said[/cite]Gay men and their dicks. A rising dick has no conscious. I've seen time , and times again. A gay guy dismissing another's partner, because he dose not want him to get in the way of what he wants.

    I am so glad I have control over my dick, and it does not control me, or if I had a good weekend or not.

    No root = bad weekend.
    root = good weekend.




    How many boyfriends did you say you have icon_question.gif

    Are you sure you have control icon_question.gif[/quote]

    You no what. I don't need sex to keep my men! Do you?

    One is yet to have sex once this year! No I control my dick, and don't need it to keep my men, so One is not cheating. Also both my men know of each other. I don't spell love as LUST either.

    Oh One has two long term relationships.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 9:29 AM GMT
    JohnnyD saidPattison said
    I am so glad I have control over my dick, and it does not control me, or if I had a good weekend or not.


    Pat, You're the same age I am. It's much easier to have control over you dick at age 46 than when you're younger. Duh.


    I know of 70 year old whom still have no control. Age has nothing to do with it. Duh. I had control of it at 25. Did you? There is no age on self control! Certainly not for men.....So all guys over 40 have no excuse for not controlling their sex drive.

    I remember working for the gay community, and Sunday was the pensioners day out. They were mainly predators. Sorry but age has no bearing on self control. if you have had sex this year. then One has better self control than you floss.

    Also One is able to do what ever I want. I don't have too hide, or lie about it.

    PS Johnie. until you have a face, and become verified. One has no interest, in your opinions or your put downs! Easy to have balls when you hid!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 10:33 AM GMT
    My last bf and I had this problem. We both had persons interested in pursuing us despite our closed relationship status. I scorned all those who approached me as such - my bf didn't. He liked the attention. As far as I know, he didn't cross any sex lines, but he would meet a couple of them in person without my knowing (which I discovered post-relationship.) So I'm all about, especially in my next relationship, cutting those people off at the start. Next time I'll intervene against his pursuers and make it clear in no uncertain terms that I will knock the shit out of them if they don't step off.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 10:45 AM GMT
    polobutt saidThat's pretty much how I feel too... Being someone that just doesn't cross those kind of boundries, I just can't figure out why friends would want to put you in a place to ruin your relationship. And it seems to happen all the time. And it's just not one friend that is doing this.


    Maybe they read that post about how your bf's sex talk mortifies you and they figure it won't be long now.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    May 14, 2008 10:50 AM GMT
    He's not a friend
    He's not respecting you or your boundaries at all

    Word of warning
    When he comes over hide the good crystal icon_confused.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 11:01 AM GMT
    Your "friend" sucks. He is disrespecting you and your boyfriend. If he doesnt respect you than cut him off.
  • Barricade

    Posts: 457

    May 14, 2008 12:15 PM GMT
    The fact that your off-limits probably makes you all the more desirable to him/others. The way some guys pursue straight men. It's not right, but he probably sees it as a challenge.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 12:22 PM GMT
    For some people, rejection really is the greatest aphrodisiac.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 1:04 PM GMT
    Barricade saidThe fact that your off-limits probably makes you all the more desirable to him/others. The way some guys pursue straight men. It's not right, but he probably sees it as a challenge.


    This is so true. I stopped wearing my wedding ring years ago because when I wear it I'm always getting hit on. When I don't wear it everbody leaves me alone.

    How sick is it for people to only be attracted to guys who are not available? I think some of these people need psychological help (and maybe your friend, too, Polobutt)!

    If your friend can't respect you, your partner and your relationship it is time to drop his sorry ass!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 2:20 PM GMT
    That is all some very great advice and I agree... Dump the friend. Thank you.

    I've decided that if he'll cross this boundry, he'll cross many.
  • MikePhilPerez

    Posts: 4357

    May 14, 2008 2:23 PM GMT
    Pattison said[quote][cite]
    You no what. I don't need sex to keep my men! Do you?

    One is yet to have sex once this year! No I control my dick, and don't need it to keep my men, so One is not cheating. Also both my men know of each other. I don't spell love as LUST either.

    Oh One has two long term relationships.






    No, I don't need sex to keep my MAN

    I guess I must have more control than you, seen as I only need one MAN.

    So your theory is if you keep it in your pants, you can have as many men as you want, and it is not cheating icon_question.gif

    Pat, I think you are confusing friends with boyfriends icon_confused.gif
  • Kevin82

    Posts: 273

    May 14, 2008 2:26 PM GMT
    Pattison saidGay men and their dicks. A rising dick has no conscious. I've seen time , and times again. A gay guy dismissing another's partner, because he dose not want him too get in the way of what he wants.

    I am so glad I have control over my dick, and it does not control me, or if I had a good weekend or not.

    No root = bad weekend.
    root = good weekend.


    Exactly :-)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 14, 2008 2:34 PM GMT
    I've had this problem too. In fact, it was my BF's very best friend who hit on me, and not very subtly either.

    I said "I cannot believe you would be interested in destroying your best friends happiness like this, because I am certainly not interested in hurting the man I love."

    And I agree - it's always when your partnered that suddenly people pay more attention to you. I think its the "but mommy, I waaaant it" syndrome in men - not just gay either. Many people desire things they do not have in their own lives when they see it in others.

    Cheating is not on the map for me.
  • SoDakGuy

    Posts: 1862

    May 14, 2008 4:40 PM GMT
    Long story short. Nope. Not at all. icon_smile.gif

    polobutt saidIt bothers me how many times you have to tell someone that you're in a monogamous relationship and you don't sleep around... What's wrong with just being friends? And would a "real friend" keep pushing himself on you, knowing that if you do sleep together it would ruin your relationship?