The Term Relationship/Boy Friend

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 21, 2011 10:38 PM GMT
    What is with guys who seem to get in and out of relationships every week? They say they have a new boy friend and it turns out to be a guy they meet at the bar last night and next week there is a new guy on their arm. They have more “ex’s” then they do friends. Any guy who I’m with less then six months I don’t consider a boy friend and it was not even a relationship as much as it was fun.

    What do you guys think, can you really be in a relationship right after you meet and guy and really consider him a boy friend or do you wait some time before you start to use those terms?
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    Sep 22, 2011 12:50 AM GMT
    I wouldn't.

    I also wouldn't tell other people how to define their relationships. If they just met yesterday and today they're boyfriends, fine. It's not your place to tell them that they just can't.
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    Sep 22, 2011 12:58 AM GMT
    You can't call your guy your "boyfriend" unless your guy also considers you his "boyfriend." It takes two to tango. In any event, I don't think you can put a timeframe on relationships. Some relationships blossom faster than others, while some take forever to reach ripeness; likewise, others never reach full maturity.
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    Sep 22, 2011 1:18 AM GMT
    Why do gay guys need to create drama out of nothing? ? ?
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    Sep 22, 2011 11:23 PM GMT
    Interesting topic. My current boyfriend does not like the term "boyfriend" but I do. It is difficult for me because it makes me wonder "What does he view me as if he doesn't like using the term 'boyfriend'?" We've been together one year this Saturday. He also never uses the term ex-boyfriend either, so maybe I shouldn't get as worried. He's used the term "partner" a few times when he's spoken about his longest long-term relationship that lasted 7 years.

    I use the term "boyfriend" when I know that the guy and I are seeing each other exclusively and we celebrate milestones, i.e. one month, two month, three month anniversaries, etc. I dunno, just my opinion.

    Edited to add: He has used the term "couple" to describe us, so there's some consolation for me there I guess. icon_neutral.gif
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    Sep 22, 2011 11:34 PM GMT
    What you call them isn't as important as how you feel about them.

    Putting a time frame on terminology is also difficult. I've had what I term "relationships" that lasted one year [two] , six years and my current one of almost 22 yrs. Does that indicate that the one year relationships were less fulfilling than the others? Labels are by nature inaccurate and should be avoided if possible.