Techniques for checking out guys in the gym without getting caught?

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  Jul 12, 2007 5:30 PM GMT

  Well, I admit it, I have a tendency to check out the other guys in the gym. I go to a straight gym as i think most of us do. So, I find myself checking out the hotties while I'm working out. Then in the locker room. Some of the guys walk around naked and seem to invite guys to look. I have terrible gaydar so i cant tell one way or the other. I'm not obviously gay so I dont think thats an issue but. If someone is walking around dangling about is that an invitation to look or do you still need to be careful. So, i was wondering does anyone have some advice on techniques or experiences checking out guys both in the gym and or locker room to share?

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  Jul 12, 2007 5:51 PM GMT

  Even straight guys check out other men. There is always the measuring up going on. "Am I bigger or is he?" Key is not to stare. Just a quick, fleeting glance at the goods. Seeing another man's penis is reassuring that each of us is alright and normal.
  
  And the guy that seems like he is the straightest man in the universe, is probably gay.

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  Jul 12, 2007 9:01 PM GMT

  I think that it is most important to be respectful. You are at the gym to work out not look at men (I hope). It makes a lot of straight men uncomfortable to have gay men gawking at their naked bodies. I would venture to generalize that most men don't get naked in the locker room so that someone else can look at them, but to take a shower or dress out. I would say that a quick glance is ok but anything more than that is disrespectful to the person.

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  Jul 12, 2007 9:21 PM GMT

  mitchster said" "...I would say that a quick glance is ok but anything more than that is disrespectful to the person..."
  
  Well put. I couldn't agree more. While hookups/relationships can be made at the gym, it is a place for working out. Many people go to the gym to escape being hassled.
  
  It is indeed a presumption and rude to stare...no one should feel that they can't at least look or glance...
  
  By the way, If someone is walking around "dangling about", I specifically would take care NOT to look at him...just because he obviously doesn't have a sense of place and time, and gets off being at being ogled. If this gym is a place for working out, there is no room for that kind of over-the-top sexual exhibitionism.

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  Jul 12, 2007 9:54 PM GMT

  ????
  Being naked in the locker room seems pretty normal to me. Unless one is somehow just lounging around naked and not going about the normal business of changing and washing. But historically, and literally, gyms are places to be naked.
  
  Oh, but as to the actual question... I remember one time that I came across a guy in the locker room who was so stunning that I couldn't help but stare (briefly, I hope). Fortunately, his reaction, when I was caught, was to flash a big grin.
  
  Eying people from a distant angle in the mirror seems to be a time honored tradition. (Oddly, my pets will engage in staring contests with me all the time, but if I catch them staring at me through the mirror, they usually put their paws over their eyes. Weird.)

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  Jul 12, 2007 10:35 PM GMT

  Had a similar experience as mindgarden - one time, literally so taken in by this man's size, and by that I mean physique - he was so big. And cuuuute as could be. He was nude, but had his back to me so I was glad that he didn't catch my reaction. I purposely try not to look when in the changing room. I dunno, I just figure that it might make the other guys (straight) feel as if they can't use the room. Hm, now that I type that I realize that your question was HOW to look, not does one look.

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  Jul 12, 2007 11:02 PM GMT

  I belonged to a mainly straight gym for about 10 years and I was always amazed by the exhibitionism and voyeurism of the straight guys. It's a definitely homoerotic atmosphere, if not explicitly gay. As others have said, it seems to be about comparing, contrasting, checking out the competition. I always found it a little disconcerting when a straight guy complemented me on a body part.
  
  During one dark period of my life, while living in Houston, I did ghost-writing for competitive body builders featured in muscle magazines. I rarely met a straight bodybuilder in that world who didn't seem gayer than most of the gay men I knew: orange bods, catty remarks about other guys, weird hair, unable to walk by a mirror without cruising themselves, fashion from another planet, etc.

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  Jul 12, 2007 11:40 PM GMT

  i am so afraid that someone will catch me glancing and then beat the shit out of me because 80% of the guys there are bigger than me.
  
  there's a tv in the corner with the news so i just keep my eyes focused on that but i can't help taking peeks.
  
  i've noticed when i'm in the gym, most of my glances aren't sexual they're envious. I'll look and think (depresssingly) "how come my body hasn't gotten to be like that yet?"

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  Jul 13, 2007 12:01 AM GMT

  Hey, thanks for all the replies. all very good info. I see I'm not alone in the glancing arena. Perhaps what I was really looking for is reassurance that other guys look as well and what your experiences have been. No, I’m not talking about the long stare...with your hand on your privates. Being gay, in a straight naked environment I don’t want to offended any of the straight guys but at the same time....it can be really difficult not to look. Strangely, I found that some of the younger guy's 18-20 who are well endowed are doing a lot of naked locker room strutting. I remember those days of being glued to the mirror myself at that age...but I could never walk around in front of other guys like that without getting instant hard-on's. either due to the "gay" factor or the massive testosterone surging thru my body! probably both!
  

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  Jul 13, 2007 1:06 AM GMT

  I've gotta say I'm like guitarboi85. There are two or three guys at my gym how are regulars. Gorgeous, and built incredibly. I just assume they're straight. At most I'm envious of their musculature.
  On the other hand, they are mostly much younger than me and so I just watch what they do to workout. I am there to workout and not cruise. Besides, I was never good at cruising in a bar, the gym would simply be out of the question.

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• Paradigm_Shif...
  
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  Jul 13, 2007 1:15 AM GMT

  I think this does a decent job of summing it all up.
  
  http://youtube.com/watch?v=I82-jzpL3EM
  

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  Jul 13, 2007 11:43 AM GMT

  LOL Paradigm_Shift. I forgot about that video. Very appropriate for this thread.

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• RSportsguy
  
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  Jul 13, 2007 2:35 PM GMT

  I go to my gym to get in my workout and try to stay focused on that. I am human though, so I do try to be as discreet as possible when I notice a hot guy that passes by. I am lucky (or unlucky) that most of the guys that are at the gym when I have to go are either much older and straight so I don't have any real temptations to distract me.

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  Jul 13, 2007 2:35 PM GMT

  Just be REALLY careful! Be discreet and remember that you are at the gym to workout... save it for the bars... though i see guys at my gym that i see at the bars... so checking them out is free game... i guess... maybe?
  
  And take Krav Maga... at least then if you get caught and they start something you can take their naked asses DOWN! (jk)

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  Jul 13, 2007 2:51 PM GMT

  from camps, to frat life, to high school and college sports and now the gym ive had my fair share stares, dicks danglin, men staring or not staring, mirror looks, quick glances and awkward moments. i think its a matter of intention. NO MAN TURNS DOWN FLATTERY even from another man when its regarding his body but its in how you approach and what your motivation is. i dont cruise the gym - by no means - and like most have said be respectful and do you workout, but i find it much easier to actually pick guys up in the gym...you clearly both are motivated, goal set... etc. its just a matter of not taking it too far and trust me if another man looks at you for whateve reason... its because they're - one some level - interested. its up to you to sort out whether or not you have the balls to say whats up... ie take notice of him taking notice of you or to walk away and leave the gym wandering if hes gay or not.

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• gymingit
  
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  Jul 13, 2007 6:39 PM GMT

  Yeah, I don't think it has to be just a QUICK glance... NOT saying to ogle or stare either. Just take a GOOD LOOK and go about your own business.
  
  There is one guy at my gym that comes into the lockerroom, changes and gets out. Yet the one day he and I were alone, he literally took his time. I was on the phone(cell, I know another discussion so hate me) and would occasionally look his way and he never made any attempt to turn away. Trust me, he is mighty fine and has a piece between his legs I wouldn't mind having myself.
  
  I don't think he's gay, I just think he didn't mind at the time. We were alone and noone around is what made the difference. I think he did it just for my benefit. lol
  
  LANCE

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  Jul 15, 2007 7:12 PM GMT

  THERE'S NO TECHNIQUES REALLY.
  i agree to those who said quick glances but why not try to approach this guy your looking at and start a conversation(if he looks friendly)?
  
  this would keep you looking at him every time you talk to this guy. you not only see him as a whole but maybe get a new friend or just n acquaintance.
  and lastly, when looking, try not to look like jerk.

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  Jul 15, 2007 10:05 PM GMT

  ...and fun. I actually enjoy catching guys looking my way. However, as I mentioned in another thread, I don't like those guys who follow you around, stare at you in the mirror and then invade your personal space to force eye contact (blatant cruising). Otherwise, I have to admit that the eye candy accounts for at least 50% of my motivation for going to the gym, in the first place.
  
  At my gym, there are a couple of really hot "thugs" (mmm thug lovin'). One of them -- the hottest of the pack -- looks at us and definitely likes to be seen. His buddy, on the other hand, puts out a strong "give me an excuse to kick your ass" vibe, so I avoid looking at him. So, my advice: be sensitive to the situation and don't look if the guy is obviously uncomfortable about it.

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  Jul 15, 2007 10:59 PM GMT

  I still can't get past the profound: "...
  Sad deperate..."
  
  I am having an existential crisis because I know there is a lesson in those words, but for some reason, I cannot fathom it.
  
  I am having sadly disparate thoughts. Or am I having sad and desperate thoughts.
  
  I don't know. But I will ponder it on my long run this afternoon. :-)
  
  John

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  Jul 16, 2007 1:36 AM GMT

  Nice ruck_us. LOL

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  Jul 16, 2007 2:05 AM GMT

  There is no such thing as a "straight" gym.
  
  Everybody check everyone else at the gym. Come to like yourself, and the rest will follow. Just don't be a creep.
  
  I about popped a little young man one day when I caught him shooting me in locker room with his cell cam. I walked over and told him if I caught him aiming the cell at me again I'd take the phone from the creep and not give it back.

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  Jul 18, 2007 5:58 AM GMT

  perhaps take the first step and talk to the guy. he may say thanks for the compliment or piss off. If there's something about his training that is unique or unfamiliar-ask him about it. Use common sense. The fella'll be appreciative.
  
  
  

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  Jul 18, 2007 6:26 AM GMT

  hm.

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• GQjock
  
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  Jul 29, 2007 1:34 PM GMT

  LOL...the refractory nature of mirrors has always worked well for me :)

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  Jul 29, 2007 11:13 PM GMT

  Yeah, the mirrors, they can be VERY useful lol - and a little dangerous too - I've seen guys in mirrors catch my wandering eye... (So who spied whom first? lol)
  
  I am a little self-conscious by nature so I think half my careful looking is driven by envy rather than attraction, although the two feelings can get mixed together sometimes.
  
  Working out to get fit is the reason most go to the gym, and I think it is only human that we compare ourselves to one another...
  
  And then there are guys who are flirts...

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