The "Gay Scene"

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 13, 2007 5:32 PM GMT
    So, it was proposed to me that people of different generations view the "gay scene" as different things. I was wondering how people viewed the "gay scene" in their city/town/hamlet. Like, I am asking, how would you define the "gay scene" where you're from? Do you like it? Why or why not?

    Personally, I view there being two gay scenes in Boston. There is the clubbing/bar going scene of guys that go to bars to judge and look rude, but stay home at night on manhunt trying to find sex/a date.

    Then there is the 'I'm gay but it's not part of my life' people who are out, but never tell people they're gay. I am wondering if there are people here like that and if so, could you maybe explain to me why you behave/say that.

    And one last thing, for those that do say it is a none issue, and do not talk about it, I am interested in knowing what you do when someone, especially at work, says something blatantly wrong about homosexuality (not bigotted, but wrong) and if you say something back? And if not why?
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    Jul 13, 2007 6:56 PM GMT
    I don't feel the need to make a retort to someone all the time, I have before, and likely will again, but it just depends on what they said and why they said it and whether or not I feel like what I have to say would make a difference.

    So, as for PHX - there is a bar crowd. There is a jock crowd, the rugby players, the softball players, the swim team, the volleyball team. They sorta run w/ the bar crowd - afterall they are typically sponsored by the bars.

    Then there is the more socialite type - traipsing about in high fashion, driving a 3 series they can barely afford and draping themselves on the lounge furniture at the more upscale locals.

    Just my observations - love 'em all.
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    Jul 13, 2007 7:07 PM GMT
    Og manly man! Og like manly men!
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    Jul 13, 2007 7:15 PM GMT
    I guess nowadays I'm in the category you described as, "being gay, but it not being a big part of my life..."

    I'm gay, but I don't go to bars (anymore). Have a handful of gay friends that frankly, I don't see much of anymore. Just life & circumstances type of thing. I don't mind if people know I'm gay - but it's not like that's the first thing I tell everyone. Some people assume I am, others seem shocked when they find out.

    I did walk in the latest Pride parade here in PHX though. And when my brother got annoying about his homophobia I said, "Michael - it's not as if everyone gay is looking to hop onto anything w/ a penis!" Which shut him up cuz he's a total prude - seriously, the boy blushes at the word nipple!
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    Jul 13, 2007 7:22 PM GMT
    paradox...

    Oww, naw. Had not to do wit dat. Floppy chests? Masculine femmes, firment hite. Hite gerly bois. Danger, danger.

    Tike my word...be afride, very afrid.
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    Jul 13, 2007 7:34 PM GMT
    Another aspect of the scene, here is Boston at least, is of gay men's social groups. There used to be gay & lesbian neighborhood groups years ago, but a gay men's social group started up in Jamaica Plain (a neighborhood of Boston) about two years ago, and they are now getting 100-150 men at every event! Given the popularity of it (especially with the over 40 crowd) there are other groups popping up. Last night, a group of us from the Cambridge Men's Group went candlepin bowling (not like that easy ten pin bowling!) and out for a beer. It's just social, but the availability to meet guys in a low-key social atmosphere is nice.

    Since the decline of the bars, and many of us not wanting to be out until 2 a.m., it's a nice alternative.
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    Jul 13, 2007 7:38 PM GMT
    matt45710 "...Another aspect of the scene, here is Boston at least, is of gay men's social groups..."

    Exactly.

    Here in the East Bay portion of the SF Bay Region, we have a group like that. Meets once a month, a social reception type of thing, to encourage friendly interaction. It's always at someone's home. Very cool.

    Here are pictures for the one just before Halloween at my place:

    East Bay Gay Guys Halloween 2006 Event
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    Jul 13, 2007 8:05 PM GMT
    I guess it takes all kinds - which is good, because that means, that someone, somewhere is glad to have met me.
  • Lincsbear

    Posts: 2589

    Jul 13, 2007 8:36 PM GMT
    Not much of a gay scene in my local area,though there`s one or two "gay friendly"pubs within half an hour`s drive.There`s a gay pride festival this month in Lincoln,but that`s about all.I`m completely out but not into the gay scene of clubs,bars,etc.I`m a quiet,masculine guy who most people who don`t know me would think was straight if they saw me on the street.My scene is either private,one-to-one,or like this,cyber based.The other guys I know are similarly based.Any support groups are non-existent.Even though I don`t make a big issue of being gay,I am out,so ignorant/homophobic comments I do try to correct/challenge.This can be quite a surprise to some people coming from someone so unstereotypical as me!
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    Jul 14, 2007 12:48 AM GMT
    I am finding that Richmond, the city that is still fighting the American Civil War, actually has a fairly large and open gay community. Especially down around Virginia Commonwealth University where I work.

    Outside of a very small number of people who know I am gay it is not something I go about discussing with people.

    I have spoken up for gays and lesbians in the past as well as anyone who is being selectively picked on by a group or person. It is the right thing to do. Regardless of race, color, creed, religion, gender, or sexual orientation.

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    Jul 14, 2007 3:20 AM GMT
    "Oww, naw. Had not to do wit dat. Floppy chests? Masculine femmes, firment hite. Hite gerly bois. Danger, danger.

    Tike my word...be afride, very afrid."



    Sound camp plus cyber not man but femine come from behind but not show face. Danger spread like pancaked make up on fake face of man would be woman. No matter the continent I go it everywhere creeping and crawling like fake eyelashes travel down sticky face of man would be woman with tampon up ass.

    Withdraw tampon! Be man!

    Be mannish lose femine rubbish trade it in! Proud you should have in penis with which you to fuck me like bitch in sweating heat not cyber -- on sidewalk like David Beckham but keeping mouth shut so voice not so manly cause sphincter to tighten and bruise penis of soccer star. Maybe he come home to England and do it me again!
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    Jul 14, 2007 4:08 AM GMT
    Obscenewish.

    Faggity wimpy thing is girly. Ya know, CU all time here talkin to girly boys...I hite these. Be a man, eat birbed wire, ya know. In the UK, we do. Ya cyber goys are too moch. I grok only boys at the Millenium Dome, ya know.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 14, 2007 6:43 AM GMT
    hey scally, try this: "the RAIN in SPAIN stays MAINLY in the PLAIN."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 14, 2007 6:48 AM GMT
    take a lesson from stewie:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=_Q5-aYUYrqw
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    Jul 14, 2007 11:59 AM GMT
    I think this site reflects the different types of homosexual men and "gay" men out in the community.
    I'm a homosexual that grew up in a rural farming community. There is no "gay" anything to speak of. I left the farm, went through college, went to live in large urban centres. In the time in the city I went to a few bars and explored the ghetto and couldn't see where I could fit in.
    Bottom line is I dont like cities, I don't live in one and like I said there's no community.
    Is here homosexual activity where I am-yep. Culd I live as a homosexual with a compadre here. Small townand rural people know you and your business-not been a problem for me.
    Would I speak up at work-it depends on the situation because I have trouble with how you phrased the issue. Some people are ignorant about verything around them not just about homo's-so I would consider the source it's coming from.
    A few others bring up the point that "gay" has nothing to do with who they are, what they like-masculine men who want to be around other masculine men. I agree.