Just came out to my first friend

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 06, 2011 3:11 AM GMT
    I know another story about coming out but just thought I'd share that I came out to one of my good friends the other day and she was the first person I've come out to and it went great. Now just gathering up the balls to tell the ol parents and siblings. Always been nervous about coming out because I didnt want me being gay to be the only defining label of me. At the point in my life now though where I am comfortable with myself and slowly coming out to my friends/family. Just now having the confidence to put my face pic as my main profile. 1 down, lots to go....wish me luck
  • smudgedude

    Posts: 260

    Oct 06, 2011 3:14 AM GMT
    congratulations, dude. i'm glad to hear that your first reveal went well.
  • thinnfit

    Posts: 11

    Oct 09, 2011 11:09 AM GMT
    It's definitely not an easy task, but being able to open up like that is courageous. Congratulations man!
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    Oct 09, 2011 11:21 AM GMT
    Congratulations man! Think of it as "letting in" rather than "coming out."
  • djzilla

    Posts: 138

    Oct 09, 2011 11:35 AM GMT
    Awesome and congrats. One step at a time and we're all proud of you. Keep us posted!
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    Oct 09, 2011 11:53 AM GMT
    Congrats!
    I'm happy to hear that.
    One advice, choose who is deserves/needs to know you're gay.
    Don't just go telling everyone, coz most of the time (you being gay) is no one's business.

    High five! icon_razz.gif
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Oct 09, 2011 12:25 PM GMT
    Well best wishes. Sounds like you are taking very positive steps in your life.
    Congrats for that. I would hope that your friends and family will only wish you the best. You look like a great guy and if your famly loves you like I'd expect, I'd think you won't have many problems.

    icon_biggrin.gif
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    Oct 09, 2011 12:32 PM GMT
    You are a great looking guy and seem friendly and laid back.... I know that Kentucky is conservative, but no more so than South Carolina and I started coming out about a year ago... let me give you some observations. You will have to find your own way, but these are just some thoughts I have....

    - weirdly,while you think that telling everyone "labels" you as gay, you get a point where so many people know that it is a non issue. The more I have come out, the less it matters. It is counterintuitive, but has been true for me.

    - about half of the people I have come out to said, "Welll.... duh..... I know that. I was just waiting for the day you told me."

    - You are you... you are not a "gay you". Balance is what you want.... your homosexuality defines you if that is how you define yourself. I can honestly say that I am so happy to be gay. I LOVE being gay. But it doesnt define me.... there is so much more.

    Good luck!!!
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    Oct 13, 2011 12:39 AM GMT
    Thanks everyone. Came out to another good friend and went well now working towards the parents lol.
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    Oct 13, 2011 12:44 AM GMT
    You've already shown your courage my friend! This is awesome and I wish you all the best with the days and weeks to come. Once I came out I never looked back and neither should you.

    Cheers,
    Scott
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    Oct 13, 2011 12:44 AM GMT
    Hey man congrats.....I wish I had the courage to make those steps like you are!
  • buckeyeboi

    Posts: 1

    Nov 10, 2011 1:43 AM GMT
    collegeguy47 saidThanks everyone. Came out to another good friend and went well now working towards the parents lol.


    The parents are always the hardest... I waited almost a year after coming out to friends before I came out to my parents. Just remember that you'll always be their son, nothing will change that!
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    Nov 10, 2011 2:12 AM GMT
    Great job. Congratulations. The first is the toughest. It gets easier and easier. At some point, you'll learn to just mix it into the conversation and move on. "Great weather we're having. I'm Gay. Pass the sugar."

    The people who count won't care either way. Parents are a different matter, sometimes, so just be prepared to give them time. You've had years to adjust. It may take them the same.

    By the way, if they're the least bit perceptive you won't be telling them anything that they don't know already.

    Congratulations. You've shown more courage than most men will show in their life.
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    Nov 10, 2011 2:14 AM GMT
    aww man .. thats great .. good luck !!
  • XiongWei

    Posts: 89

    Nov 10, 2011 2:14 AM GMT
    Nice one mate ! I wish you the best of luck with everyone else you choose to tell.
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    Nov 10, 2011 2:16 AM GMT
    collegeguy47 saidI know another story about coming out but just thought I'd share that I came out to one of my good friends the other day and she was the first person I've come out to and it went great. Now just gathering up the balls to tell the ol parents and siblings. Always been nervous about coming out because I didnt want me being gay to be the only defining label of me. At the point in my life now though where I am comfortable with myself and slowly coming out to my friends/family. Just now having the confidence to put my face pic as my main profile. 1 down, lots to go....wish me luck


    congratulations!!! you're doing this at your pace and your time, that's awesome.

    thank you for sharing, please keep us posted, yeah?

    icon_biggrin.gif
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    Nov 11, 2011 1:42 AM GMT
    mdstudio saidCongratulations man! Think of it as "letting in" rather than "coming out."


    This is actually a great way to think of it that has never occurred to me before.

    I've been struggling to come to terms with my sexuality for a long time now but im starting to gain a bit of confidence and feel a little more comfortable in my own skin. I came out to my parent's last christmas break and I've only been out to a handful of others for a little longer than that. Just a few days ago I came out to a really close friend and they took it really well. I'm sick of living this double life and absolutely hate lying to my friends about who I am. It's time to take control of my life.

    I'm now working on telling my close friends at school. It's my final undergrad year and I'd rather tell people in person before I graduate than just say nothing and have them find out on their own down the road. While I've still got plenty of ground to cover, as other's have said the process of coming out never really stops. It does have to start somewhere though.

    All the best and good luck!
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    Nov 11, 2011 1:43 AM GMT
    Good luck to you. Best wishes!
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    Nov 11, 2011 1:58 AM GMT
    Congratulation my friend!!!!!

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  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Nov 11, 2011 2:10 AM GMT
    Blow the cork out of the bottle of emotions. Come out to your parents. You need to do it now while you are this free. The world on the other side is worth staying alive for.
  • somedaytoo

    Posts: 704

    Nov 11, 2011 2:12 AM GMT
    Glad it went well.
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    Nov 11, 2011 2:21 AM GMT
    Congrats! I will keep you in my prayers that all goes well for you!
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    Nov 11, 2011 2:44 AM GMT
    collegeguy47 saidAlways been nervous about coming out because I didnt want me being gay to be the only defining label of me.

    Courage, mon ami, you're doing fine. And don't worry about gay becoming your defining label. Rather, pity the poor straight guys who define themselves as Rangers fans or whatever, or by whether their pickup truck is a Ford or a Chevy. You couldn't do worse with gay. LOL!