Muscles = more or less insecurity?

  • BlackRussian1...

    Posts: 323

    Oct 06, 2011 5:10 PM GMT
    I just wonder what your take on this is as it seems to be it's the more "average" men who are secure in their bodies while muscle men, imho, can be wildly and irrationally insecure in their looks. By pumping up are we becoming more or less neurotic in your opinion? Why or why not?
  • mizu5

    Posts: 2599

    Oct 06, 2011 5:13 PM GMT
    I think it depends on if you have a set goal in mind, or the goal of " to be happy". Plus it depends, are you filling a hole in your life with exercise and working out? Making up for something?
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    Oct 06, 2011 5:26 PM GMT
    jprichva saidMost bodybuilders, in my experience, build their muscles up like a vulcanized coat of armor to protect their inner pussy.


    This. Same goes for those who use roids too.

    It makes them feel valuable to society by being hugely ripped.
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    Oct 06, 2011 5:37 PM GMT
    I think it depends on the person.
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    Oct 06, 2011 5:38 PM GMT
    FistersChoice said
    jprichva saidMost bodybuilders, in my experience, build their muscles up like a vulcanized coat of armor to protect their inner pussy.


    I didnt know Dr. Ruth died.
    She kinda seems better than Sue


    Inner pussy is good pussy.



    Chainers said
    jprichva saidMost bodybuilders, in my experience, build their muscles up like a vulcanized coat of armor to protect their inner pussy.


    This. Same goes for those who use roids too.

    It makes them feel valuable to society by being hugely ripped.


    I thought you wanted a guy whos bigger than you.


    I do, but there is a thing such as too big. Many guys out here in the Castro use steroids and it is so the anti hot.

    I prefer naturally bigger guys. Plus body builder =/= muscular. I prefer a muscular hairy man to a huge one.
  • suedeheadscot

    Posts: 1130

    Oct 06, 2011 5:43 PM GMT
    ^ muscular hairy man checking in then (ahem).

    Ok - I find working out in the gym and doing the weights actually helped increase my level of security, which was pretty much ok to start with. As a slim guy, I started to get more definition around the chest and arms, and i noticed the health benefits too (believe it or not, there are some great benefits to doing weights and developing muscle - you're more unlikely to become diabetic, if you do squats you're less likley to develop bowel cancer etc etc). But with one of the previous guys who posted above, I totally agree - I believe there is such a thing as too much, such as when it overtakes your life and/or you start fucking around with steroids.
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    Oct 06, 2011 5:59 PM GMT
    FistersChoice said
    Chainers said
    FistersChoice said
    jprichva saidMost bodybuilders, in my experience, build their muscles up like a vulcanized coat of armor to protect their inner pussy.


    I didnt know Dr. Ruth died.
    She kinda seems better than Sue


    Inner pussy is good pussy.



    Chainers said
    jprichva saidMost bodybuilders, in my experience, build their muscles up like a vulcanized coat of armor to protect their inner pussy.


    This. Same goes for those who use roids too.

    It makes them feel valuable to society by being hugely ripped.


    I thought you wanted a guy whos bigger than you.


    I do, but there is a thing such as too big. Many guys out here in the Castro use steroids and it is so the anti hot.

    I prefer naturally bigger guys. Plus body builder =/= muscular. I prefer a muscular hairy man to a huge one.


    bodybuilder inequal to muscular?
    LSNED


    Someone who is muscular does not have to be a hugely build body builder. There is a thing as too much muscles fellas.
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    Oct 06, 2011 6:32 PM GMT
    It all depends on the reason for working out, of which there are myriad.

    I feel that those of us who work out solely for aesthetics, as opposed to health/function/athleticism (as well as/instead of), are more likely to have bigger insecurities, but not always.

    If somebody always feels a strong need to be bigger, heavier and more muscly or else be deeply self-loathing about their looks, then, that is a strong indicator.

    Most people are somewhat insecure to an extent regarding something or other about themselves, some only to an intermittent and negligible amount, and some are perpetually neurotically crippled by it. We can't just lump everyone in the same boat just because they like to look good/feel good.

    There is a fine line between a bit of harmless vanity and a neurotic insecurity. I think the difference is the latter will never be truly satisfied with their looks/physicality (despite how great others think they look), and the former usually already is content for the most part, but just likes to make the best of their features/enjoys maximizing what they already like about themselves as well as the feeling of accomplishment that comes from striving towards goals to be their best.
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    Oct 06, 2011 6:37 PM GMT
    It depends on their reason for working out. One of the most insecure people I know became a weightlifter because he likes bragging to everyone about how strong he is and how much he could lift. He was always bad at sports and he always got picked on in school so he had to do something to compensate for that. My reason for working out is to become what I'm attracted to and to attract guys that are my type.
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    Oct 06, 2011 6:40 PM GMT
    Oh, I'll own this. The world is full of happy, secure people. They are fat or thin, beautiful or ugly. Life is for living, animals are for eating, trees are for chopping. If that's you, that's great.

    Those who are not strive endlessly until they die, never fully happy with themselves--except for maybe moments of glee--and I'm OK with being one of them. If you're happy as you are, stay happy. If you're not happy as you are, it's not a melodrama tragedy. Perhaps you were raised as a Protestant (like me) and don't mind the shoulder-to-the-grindstone effort of life.

    Can't rest? Insecure around people? So fucking what. It's my delusion, so let me enjoy it.
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    Oct 06, 2011 6:42 PM GMT
    I agree with Chainers, There is definitely such thing as too much. Guys who are over-buffed/overbuild beyond the natural physical state is absolutely not attractive.

    And to answer BlackRussian's question, if someone is already insecure and has interpersonal issues, they might work out to fill the void. In situations like that though, getting bigger does not fulfill anything, and instead they keep going because what they already have is never enough.


    For all I know I am talking out of my ass and might not make any sense. I don't work out and haven't completely observed such things.
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    Oct 06, 2011 6:43 PM GMT
    It really depends. Most guys would like to ramp up their bods so they can get better better lays .
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    Oct 06, 2011 6:45 PM GMT
    mickeytopogigio saidOh, I'll own this. The world is full of happy, secure people. They are fat or thin, beautiful or ugly. Life is for living, animals are for eating, trees are for chopping. If that's you, that's great.

    Those who are not strive endlessly until they die, never fully happy with themselves--except for maybe moments of glee--and I'm OK with being one of them. If you're happy as you are, stay happy. If you're not happy as you are, it's not a melodrama tragedy. Perhaps you were raised as a Protestant (like me) and don't mind the shoulder-to-the-grindstone effort of life.

    Can't rest? Insecure around people? So fucking what. It's my delusion, so let me enjoy it.


    QFT.

    Amen, brother.
  • starboard5

    Posts: 969

    Oct 06, 2011 6:48 PM GMT
    The neurosis/insecurity was there in the first place.
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    Oct 06, 2011 6:49 PM GMT
    There are vapid, insecure people of all shapes and sizes just as there are kind-hearted, accepting people of all shapes and sizes.

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    Oct 06, 2011 7:11 PM GMT
    Obsession with how others perceive you is insecurity, and does lead to neurotic behaviour.

    I was much less secure 12 years ago when I was way more buff. Being buff did not make me insecure, however. I did that on my own.
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    Oct 06, 2011 7:22 PM GMT
    "Muscles" are a consequence of the neurosis/insecurity, not the cause, or the cure. If you are insecure and neurotic to begin with, getting jacked will neither make it better or worse. That's not where it's coming from.
  • FRE0

    Posts: 4863

    Oct 06, 2011 7:52 PM GMT
    When I was a kid, my mother told me that I should always wear something more substantial than a T shirt so that people couldn't see how skinny I was. In high school, I was smaller than most of the other boys. I remember what a boy said when I was coming out of the shower (when I was a preppy): "For such a little guy, he sure has a big cock." So, at the earliest opportunity, when I was 22, I took up weight lifting; it made a big difference in my self-confidence.

    There is, however, a difference between being well-built and looking like a freak. My genes would not permit me to look like a freak anyway.
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    Oct 06, 2011 9:13 PM GMT
    I was brought up around a lot of judgement, and it was so passive and pervasive. It was embedded in my brain before I could stand back and look at myself. My dad could be termed a "people-watcher" by today's standards. Whether it was people we knew, or just someone walking down the street, he would have commentary on their looks, how they acted, or what they said. I'll admit that I still find myself judging people, but not nearly as much.

    Maybe things like that had a deal of influence of why I started lifting. All I know is that insecurity is not a big motivating factor now on why I lift. And yes, I do lift for "aesthetics" primarily but health is important too. Personally, lifting is a hobby now. Just like reading or making music. The closest comparison to why I lift would maybe be someone who likes getting tattoo's or piercings. Seeing my body change is awesome. Then again, I guess the insecurity argument can be made for people who like tattoos or piercings too. icon_razz.gif

    I think insecurity is a big contributing factor for why a lot of people lift, use steroids, etc. Not everyone, though.
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    Oct 06, 2011 10:05 PM GMT
    For me, less insecurity. I love what I see in the mirror. If others like what they see, wonderful. If not, I really don't give a shit.

    Also, these muscles are not just for show. They do work as well. My goal is to be able to be able to take a guy in my arms and repeatedly hoist him up and down at cock level.

    Pony ride! (at the "sekret kave"; No gurls alowed!)

    gay-asian-anime-hp-002.jpg
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    Oct 06, 2011 10:10 PM GMT
    Many pumped up muscle guys can be quite insecure, but their insecurity doesn't hold a candle to the insecurity held by very overweight and morbidly obese people. But the worst insecurity is held by RJ'ers with 10 extra pounds who are about to go on a cruise or to the beach for vacation.
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    Oct 06, 2011 10:15 PM GMT
    I'll be honest. . .I am not always 100% secure and confident with myself, and there is a part of me that constantly thinks - "If I can get my body to be perfect, maybe I'll be happier with myself."
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    Oct 06, 2011 10:16 PM GMT
    There is no necessary connection.
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    Oct 06, 2011 10:16 PM GMT
    7Famark saidI'll be honest. . .I am not always 100% secure and confident with myself, and there is a part of me that constantly thinks - "If I can get my body to be perfect, maybe I'll be happier with myself."
    If I could get my body to be perfect, I wouldn't be any happier with myself.
    But I would buy a lot of mirrors and towels.
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    Oct 06, 2011 10:58 PM GMT
    I think skinny little bitches that whine that big muscle guys are 'too big' 'just not attractive' or 'covering up massive insecurity complexes' are just insecure and jealous that they're not willing to put in the work and do what it takes to achieve something they would be happy with even though it's a quarter of what someone else whos still striving for bigger and better has achieved with their body.