Looks fade, but does personality fade too?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 11, 2011 3:52 PM GMT
    I know we've all been fed the idea that looks alone aren't enough to sustain a long-term relationship because youthful good looks will eventually fade. I totally agree with that, but I was thinking...does personality fade too? Well, maybe not "fade" so much as "change" for better or for worse. Have any of you guys ever ended a relationship with someone because they just weren't the same person they used to be?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 11, 2011 6:52 PM GMT
    I definitely think that the personality of a person does change.

    As a matter of fact I think that that's what makes it so hard to keep a relationship well going.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 11, 2011 7:11 PM GMT
    hardly anything is immutable. Change is most often expected.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 11, 2011 7:12 PM GMT
    Also, think about the fact that our brains do degenerate as we age. Just like we need to keep our bodies active, we have to keep our minds active. Personality changes are common as people age and we're more likely to devote more and more time to those around us while becoming less open to meeting new people or having new experiences.
  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Oct 11, 2011 7:27 PM GMT
    But...at what age do looks begin to fade? icon_confused.gif
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    Oct 11, 2011 7:30 PM GMT
    Everything fades.

    It's called entropy.

    Entropy is that nature tends from order to disorder in isolated systems.
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    Oct 11, 2011 7:35 PM GMT
    It does and should change. And yes, can go to better or worse depending on how you look at it.

    If you both grow together - you will have a good road ahead of you.

    If you grow in different directions, or one of you stops all together, then - things will have to change one way or another.

    Looks don't HAVE to fade btw. AT least not as soon as some dudes seem to think. Not looking 23 does NOT equate to faded looks. Period.

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    Oct 11, 2011 7:49 PM GMT
    motov8 saidEverything fades.

    It's called entropy.

    Entropy is that nature tends from order to disorder in isolated systems.


    That's true for stochastic systems, but ageing is genetic, i.e. programmed into us. In people who live to 100 and beyond, it's found that a certain set of genes seems to be key. The fraying of telomeres (the ends of chromosomes) also contributes to ageing, whilst things like balding are the result of male hormones causing hair follicles to atrophy (an evolutionary signal to females that the male has reached maturity).

    It is probably less a case of entropy and more a case of obsolescence. We evolve by dying out and being replaced by the next generation of product.

    Diet and exercise are about the only things you can work on to mitigate this predisposition.

    Anyway, in answer to the original question: Ageing tends to make a person more stable and reliable, because they realise they don't have as much time ahead as they've wasted in the past chasing after men and women and work reduces their free time. Women seem to prefer maturer men, whilst men prefer younger men and women, because they find them better looking.
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    Oct 14, 2011 5:14 AM GMT
    malefeet saidBut...at what age do looks begin to fade? icon_confused.gif


    For gays, at age 30. After that, gays don't want anything to do with you. If you are over 30, just forget about the gay community. It's only for people with smokin' hot bodies and who are over 18, but under 30.
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    Oct 14, 2011 5:15 AM GMT
    BlondOverBlue said
    malefeet saidBut...at what age do looks begin to fade? icon_confused.gif


    For gays, at age 30. After that, gays don't want anything to do with you. If you are over 30, just forget about the gay community. It's only for people with smokin' hot bodies and who are over 18, but under 30.


    False.
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    Oct 14, 2011 5:15 AM GMT
    Alzheimer's icon_sad.gif
  • waccamatt

    Posts: 1918

    Oct 14, 2011 5:18 AM GMT
    BlondOverBlue said
    malefeet saidBut...at what age do looks begin to fade? icon_confused.gif


    For gays, at age 30. After that, gays don't want anything to do with you. If you are over 30, just forget about the gay community. It's only for people with smokin' hot bodies and who are over 18, but under 30.


    Life begins at 30 and gets better with age.
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    Oct 14, 2011 5:23 AM GMT
    BlondOverBlue said
    waccamatt said
    BlondOverBlue said
    malefeet saidBut...at what age do looks begin to fade? icon_confused.gif


    For gays, at age 30. After that, gays don't want anything to do with you. If you are over 30, just forget about the gay community. It's only for people with smokin' hot bodies and who are over 18, but under 30.


    Life begins at 30 and gets better with age.


    Do the unicorns speak in your world too? Just wondering...


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  • dancedancekj

    Posts: 1761

    Oct 14, 2011 5:28 AM GMT
    I think that's true. There are some core values that will remain the same, but I think that a person's outlook and priorities can change very rapidly and drastically. A layoff, a near-death experience, a major loss, a major breakthrough or epiphany.

    That being said, I think a strong partnership is when one realizes the other is undergoing such changes and remains their metaphorical anchor and is comfortable enough to accept the person after the change. Human bodies completely turn over every seven years, and why would we assume the personality remains the same?

    ETA: I generally ignore most boys under 25. 30 is more my desired dating age, since by that time generally men actually have their lives and shit together, instead of being little man-boys. To each their own I guess.