HIV INFECTION ~ ORAL SEX

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 14, 2007 6:47 PM GMT
    We have all heard the saying that Oral sex is "safer " sex, which I too to an extent believe to be true with the very limited evidence at hand. However since my diagnosis in June 2005 I have learnt of many people claiming to have contracted HIV the same way as myself, Oral Sex !

    Yes we are shunned and even called liars, dismissed as false statistics and accused of trying to scare monger.

    Well the fact of the matter is oral transmittion of HIV is a very real threat, and one we should wake up too and invest more research and obtain reliable evidence.

    With the huge increase in herpes, syphilis and other STD's our mouth is becoming a more suitable route of transmission as the HIV has the ability to ' piggy back ' into our system.

    Since the Thatcher years of huge icebergs and information regarding HIV, I decided that it was something I would never catch. I always used condoms for anal sex and never allowed anyone to ejaculate into my mouth. I never had a condom split on me and wouldn’t even kiss if i had cracked lips. I was obsessed to point that I used to phone the National Aids helpline to ensure what I was doing was safe and that I was protected.

    In May 2005 I had oral sex with a stranger, he was fit, toned and looked the perfect bill of health. This didn’t prevent me from practicing safe sex. However without warning the guy ejaculated in my mouth. It happened so quick and with no warning. I was angry that it had happened, but not concerned as oral sex was considered safer sex.

    After 4 weeks I fell dreadfully ill, I had a sore on my penis and raised lymph nodes in my groin. I was suffering a temperature of 103 and was listless.

    I decided to get myself off to the GUM and gave blood for a HIV test, thankfully the results were back the same day and I was negative ( June 16th 2005 ). I was elated and so very happy and relieved.

    I was seen by a Consultant as I had also developed a body rash, he was mildly concerned that I was suffering a seroconversion illness, but from my sexual history and negative HIV test thought improbable.

    Due to the severity of my symptoms, it was decided that a special p24 test should be carried out. This test finds the HIV virus rather than the anti bodies, I was to return in 4 days time for the results.

    The next 4 days were fine, I had been given a negative HIV test and thought my illness was something doing the rounds. I was not worried about the result, lets face it Oral sex is safer sex right, wrong !

    I sat in the GUM waiting room for the nurse to give me the all clear. Instead the Consultant called me in, I thought this is odd, what does he want.? I sat down and was told that the HIV virus was present in my body and that I was also suffering with herpes. I starred at him and kept repeating " this is so unfair ". I had always protected myself, washed hands, rinsed mouth, used condoms covered any grazes I may have had.

    I sat there and just kept repeating " this is so unfair " Within 4 days I had been diagnosed HIV negative and then HIV positive. My head was messed up as you can imagine.

    The consultant concluded that the guy who ejaculated in my mouth could have been shedding the herpes virus and that the HIV came with it.

    I was gutted, the first time I had encountered any kind of ' safer ' ( not safe ) sex and I was infected.

    The turmoil then got worse as I was advised it could be a false positive result, so more bloods were taken to see if my body had yet produced anti bodies. Two weeks later it was a definite confirmation. I was HIV positive from oral sex.

    The usual philes of bloods were taken and my viral load came back at 100,000 and a cd4 of 535, within 3 months my viral load had dropped by 87,000 to 13,000 and cd4 increased to over 600.

    So what are the actual risks of catching HIV from oral sex ? Statistically I was told 1 in 50,000. Yet since my diagnosis more and more people have informed that they too caught it from oral transmission.

    We use lube and condoms for anal sex, but what protected apart from saliva do we have for our mouths. How healthy are our gums, how often do we bite our tongue whilst eating, what gum damage do we cause when flossing or brushing, how safe is our tongue after cleaning it. Tooth picks, knives and forks, sharp crisps, and other foods damage our mouth tissue. Hot drinks can burn the lining of the mouth causing small blisters. All these make a perfect opening for HIV and other STD's

    Perhaps through the circumstances surrounding my infection, others may consider a little more regarding what risk they are prepared to take when having Oral sex.

    Do I feel cheated out of a healthy life. Yes I do. I didn’t ask the guy to ejaculate and would not have invited such an act. The actions I took were considered safer, but how safe was my mouth.


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 14, 2007 7:28 PM GMT
    WOW - Thanks for sharing that with us.

    Rick
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 14, 2007 7:32 PM GMT
    I don't think you even need someone to cum in your mouth to get herpes.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 16, 2007 11:11 PM GMT
    I am a firm believer in being safe whether it is oral sex or anal. i mean we all take a risk if we have sex with people we dont know well. i agree that it is great that you shared that information, because it could deffinitely be true in my opinion.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 17, 2007 9:35 PM GMT
    I wonder how oral sex gave a sore on his penis?
  • dfrourke

    Posts: 1062

    Jul 19, 2007 12:34 AM GMT
    ...thanks for sharing your story...

    ...unfortunately, the only zero-risk situation regarding HIV is NO SEX...which [my personal opinion] is not an option for most gay men and not realistic...so, we all need to make choices about acceptable levels of risk and update our education...

    http://www.aidsmeds.com/ [is a really great website to educate yourself]

    ...I too have worked with far too many newly diagnosed individuals who have "done all the right things" and then contracted HIV...of course these are self reports and there is a great deal of shame many of us who are infected deal with initially to know how accurate these personal stories are...but it is worth talking about...

    ...I believe most gay men do not even know what "sero-conversion" looks like to recognize it in themselves [or others]...I certainly recognized symptoms but did not necessarily attach them to HIV and then also had my diagnosis confirmed a few months later after...

    - David
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 20, 2007 1:03 AM GMT
    Regarding herpes, the simplex 1 virus and the simplex 2 virus can mutate from one to the other, one being genital, and one being oral. If you have a cold sore on your mouth, touch it and then touch your penis, it is entirely possible to give yourself genital herpes. Sorry guys, I got that from a doctor. No guessing here.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 21, 2007 12:26 AM GMT
    My advise, use a rubber while giving or receiving head. Always do!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 22, 2007 6:11 PM GMT
    Oh Please what load of rot! Give me a break!
    SEX = DEATH we get it already.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2007 4:15 PM GMT
    I read this and got tested...I am negative, but I will also not think oral sex is as safe as I have been lead to believe.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 07, 2007 4:01 PM GMT
    thanks for the brief information. that would be a great help...


    regards,

    risch
  • shyguysport

    Posts: 62

    Sep 28, 2007 5:26 AM GMT
    I have been in this field for a long time and I have a couple of observations. First, a lot of guys just can't bring themselves to admit they get fucked. So, they simply lie when disclosing their sexual practices. Second, most of the definitive studies have shown that orally transmitted cases, in the absence of some prior sore of open wound, is next to nothing. I would have to agree.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 28, 2007 12:40 PM GMT
    "First, a lot of guys just can't bring themselves to admit they get fucked."

    I wondered about that. My recollection of when Andrew Sullivan came out as HIV+ is that he made a big deal about it being from oral sex without ejaculation. But, later he was discovered hooking up online for bareback anal sex, and I find it hard to believe that he only became a cum pig bottom boy after his seroconversion.
  • dreamer

    Posts: 91

    Oct 25, 2007 3:50 PM GMT
    As someone that just tested neg 2 weeks ago, I was interested in reading this thread. I am also super careful to the point of paranoia - but this gentleman's story put that irrational fear right back in me. Is sex worth the risk?icon_confused.gif
  • janu88

    Posts: 345

    Dec 01, 2010 6:07 PM GMT
    dreamer saidAs someone that just tested neg 2 weeks ago, I was interested in reading this thread. I am also super careful to the point of paranoia - but this gentleman's story put that irrational fear right back in me. Is sex worth the risk?icon_confused.gif


    i think having sex with strangers is not worth the risk......

    just have sex within a reliatonship..
    untill you have all the PORN and hand you need icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 01, 2010 6:17 PM GMT
    An alarmist thread by a hidden member.

    More likely a plant meant to disrupt us. The OP reeks of stereotypical myths that have no basis in reality.

    We need to know when we are being conned here.
  • commoncoll

    Posts: 1222

    Dec 01, 2010 6:37 PM GMT
    An alarmist thread by a hidden member.

    More likely a plant meant to disrupt us. The OP reeks of stereotypical myths that have no basis in reality.

    We need to know when we are being conned here.

    This was three years ago.
  • Mepark

    Posts: 806

    Dec 01, 2010 6:59 PM GMT
    I'm not going to claim the OP was lying but no need for alarm. Oral sex is still safe absent an unhealthy mouth and lack of common sense.. The evidence proves it: the gay community would be wiped out by AIDS if it weren't.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 01, 2010 8:28 PM GMT
    Mepark saidI'm not going to claim the OP was lying but no need for alarm. Oral sex is still safe absent an unhealthy mouth and lack of common sense.. The evidence proves it: the gay community would be wiped out by AIDS if I weren't.


    True. Very True.

    Also with regards to herpes. U cant transmit it from ur mouth to ur genitalia. This is called 'autoinoculation' and can only happen within ur first herpes outbreak because then you have not yet developed antibodies for it. If anything, having oral herpes (which 80% of the population have as it is basically a cold sore) gives you protection for herpes as it is then impossible to get infected by the same strain 'down there' and a lot harder for another strain be it HSV1 or 2 as the anitbodies for both are virtually identical and will put up a good fight if the u come into contact with the second strain. x
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 27, 2013 6:03 PM GMT
    We should continue educating others about this. So many people still have no idea. The recent HIV revelations from porn stars
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    Sep 27, 2013 6:32 PM GMT
    Im so sorry to hear that happened to you.
    Contracting HIV through oral sex is less likely but still possible. This one should be a wake up call to all the idiots around here dismissing this disease and even having random sex with no condoms.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 27, 2013 6:42 PM GMT
    David3000 saidIm so sorry to hear that happened to you.
    Contracting HIV through oral sex is less likely but still possible. This one should be a wake up call to all the idiots around here dismissing this disease and even having random sex with no condoms.


    Indeed. Sex is good. Condom is good. Sex is good. Condom is good. Repeat and repeat. But I guess get tested often if you are sexually active. Awareness is important.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 28, 2013 2:17 AM GMT
    David3000 saidIm so sorry to hear that happened to you.
    Contracting HIV through oral sex is less likely but still possible. This one should be a wake up call to all the idiots around here dismissing this disease and even having random sex with no condoms.


    Do you have any HIV+ friends? Have you ever personally known anyone who is HIV+?
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    Sep 28, 2013 2:18 AM GMT
    DweebDude said
    David3000 saidIm so sorry to hear that happened to you.
    Contracting HIV through oral sex is less likely but still possible. This one should be a wake up call to all the idiots around here dismissing this disease and even having random sex with no condoms.


    Do you have any HIV+ friends? Have you ever personally known anyone who is HIV+?


    yes, why?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 28, 2013 2:21 AM GMT
    David3000 said
    DweebDude said
    David3000 saidIm so sorry to hear that happened to you.
    Contracting HIV through oral sex is less likely but still possible. This one should be a wake up call to all the idiots around here dismissing this disease and even having random sex with no condoms.


    Do you have any HIV+ friends? Have you ever personally known anyone who is HIV+?


    yes, why?


    Just wondering.